Monday, September 18, 2006

How did I wind up on the wrong side of the cage door?

In a scene that would be right at home in the primate cages at Yerkes, a bunch of folks burned effigies of some guy in a dress yesterday because he allegedly said bad things about their invisible friend. Or something.

As best I can tell, it went down like this: The guy in the funky clothes, who is the head spokesdude for a bunch of people who like an invisible guy, repeated some seven hundred year-old slander about a bunch of people who like a different invisible guy (or maybe the same invisible guy going under a different nom de guerre; theologians differ.) Basically, he implied that they were all violent and warlike. The fans of the second invisible guy, upset at being called violent and warlike, immediately protested this unfair characterization by rioting and promising to go to war against the followers of the first invisible guy.
"We shall break the cross and spill the wine. ... God will (help) Muslims to conquer Rome. ... God enable us to slit their throats, and make their money and descendants the bounty of the mujahideen,"
This would be comical, if it wasn't for the fact that the followers of the second invisible guy are trying their level best to get nukyular weapons.

Personally, I don't see what there is to get all-fired upset about. I mean, so the spokesdude for the first invisible guy said some mean things, but how seriously can you take a guy who wears dresses with red loafers and has a staffer in charge of casting out demons who gets publically wrapped around the axle over children's novels? This doesn't stop the followers of the second invisible guy, though, not for a minute; they can get their noses out of joint to the point of rioting over an editorial cartoon, so actual seven century old slander is like a red flag to them, and rates a spot of nun-killing at the local children's hospital.

*Sigh.*

How did I get stuck on this planet?

10 comments:

Lizard said...

Like the saying goes, a religious war is a fight to see who has the best imaginary friend.

Sigh.

I think South Park (as is often the case) had the truth of it: This planet is a 'reality show', entertaining aliens across the universe as we do stupid, goofy, violently self-destructive things. No other explanation makes sense.

phlegmfatale said...

I love the way you point out the irony of them becoming violent and crazed at being called violent and crazed. Clearly it's time we really open up a can.

treefroggy said...

You were placed here by one of the invisible guys. Your pick.

DirtCrashr said...

I thought it was, "Spill the wine, take the pearl"...

B&N said...

Proving the arguments for us, and all that.

I think it's funny that they won't imbibe, considering that the Egyptians are generally accepted as the first civilization to actively make large quantities of beer.

The irony is killing me.

phlegmfatale said...

Ok, the day has worn on and I want to say something else, having achieved a rolling head of steam on this issue. What is the deal with killing an old lady who lives a spartan existence in a disease-rife community just to help people of predominantly Muslim faith? Do they think that in some way makes inroads or makes some triumphant point for the justice of their cause? Add "stupid" to the list of adjectives we already have for them.
What a bunch of maroons!

Chris said...

"We're a non-violent people, and we'll kill anyone that says different!"

bjbarron said...

What do you expect.

They are barbarians, practicing a faith offered up to some vicious warlord in a cave by a demon, and they see the 7th century as the standard for the world.

They neither sow nor do they reap in the modern sense. But, like all barbarians, they are good at killing and taking.

If there weren't so many freakin' many of them, their rituals would make an episode on Ripley's Believe It or Not. If they didn't have oil under their dirt, they'd still be starving in the desert where they belong.

Why they strike anyone of worthy of negotiation or appeasement, I'll never know...I would prefer just to strike them.

Zendo Deb said...

"How did I get stuck on this planet?"

Karma....

TripleNeckSteel said...

Only problem is, it wasn't "slander".

Muslims only want other Muslims to be able to comment on their faith- and not even really then.

They have a pathological aversion to the truth.