Wednesday, July 02, 2008

What was their first clue?

What tipped Starbucks off to the need to close some 600 stores?

Was it when they realized that they'd inadvertently opened a free-standing Starbucks kiosk in the foyer of a mega Starbucks? (And forget the LHC, hippies; what would that do to causality and the fabric of spacetime? A Starbucks infinite regression loop...)

11 comments:

Turk Turon said...

People have been lampooning Starbucks' explosive growth for years.

In an episode of the Simpsons, Lisa is seen entering a shopping mall; there are the usual odd-ball "boutiques" - Hair Today, Just Pencils, Goys 'R' Us and so forth. Lisa is inside the mall for only five seconds or so. When she exits, all of the stores have been changed to Starbucks.

Even NPR, on April Fools Day, ran a story about Starbucks building an enormous "coffee-bean sluice" from Seattle to Chicago, to carry roasted beans in a slurry over the Rocky Mountains.

Unusual thing about Starbucks is that all the stores are owned by the company; it's not a franchise.

verification: uziwctr

Ken said...

There's a ceiling on demand for burnt coffee? Who knew?

Rabbit said...

There's a silver lining to the proliferation of Starbucks mushroom.

The numbers of Mom-and-Pop coffee stands have increased significantly as a result of introducing people to foo-foo coffees; when we had our coffeehouse, one of the most frequent comments we heard was "This is soooo much better than that Starbucks we had the other week".

At least they quit asking if "it was like that good Hills' Bros. coffee they had the other day".

I've introduced JPG and Matt to Dunn Bros. coffee, roasted fresh daily. Of course, Matt got his own home roaster so he's officially a coffee snob now.

Regards,
Rabbit.

RM1(SS) (ret) said...

Here's a better Starbuck's loop: http://improveverywhere.com/2003/03/22/the-moebius/

Anonymous said...

The Onion did a story years ago headlined "New Starbucks to open in restroom of area Starbucks."

As for Starbucks' effect on local Mom 'n' Pop coffee stands, I've read in several different articles that many business consultants advise against opening an independent coffee shop unless there already is a Starbucks in the area, because they create and enhance the demand.

As for me, I am not a coffee drinker, but I do enjoy a double short mocha from time to time. And given the choice of a Starbucks with their pay-to-surf T-Mobile and the little shop down the street with free Wi-Fi and lower prices, I don't even hesitate.

I will say this for all espresso vendors - if you're new to an area and want to see some cute chi- uh, some attractive young women, find the nearest coffee shop.

Anonymous said...

Lewis Black has a bit about finding a Starbucks directly across the street from another Starbucks in Houston, Texas (my hometown). This was in fact true at the time. With any luck at least one or the other will close.

Fuzzy Curmudgeon said...

I can identify two separate locations on the north side of Indianapolis where you can see a Starbucks from another Starbucks -- the Target in Nora (there is another Starbucks in the mall across the parking lot) and the Target at Michigan and 106th (another Starbucks in the strip mall across the street).

Undoubtedly there are more.

phlegmfatale said...

Rolling through Little Rock on the way home from visiting the folks several months ago, I stopped at a Starbucks and brought in the laptop to hop on the wifi and see what was happening back in the 21st century. Darned thing wouldn't work. I axt the counter boy wtf, and he said I could get on their wifi but I had to pay $10. I sat there and checked the email on my cell foam for free, instead. Meh. At $10 a pop, they can keep their wifi.

Tam said...

What does it say when Krystals have free WiFi and Starbucks don't?

Anonymous said...

Starbucks as outposts of Gallifrey--interesting concept. Does that meant Gitmo is really Shada?

http://www.drwhoguide.com/who_5v.htm

Anonymous said...

Here's how it used to work:

Starbucks had an elaborate formula that analyzed traffic patterns. Projected store revenue was a matter of traffic density. Thus, it was entirely possible that you could see multiple stores seemingly too close together. In reality, these stores turned a healthy profit.

I suspect a number of things did in this formula. One was their folksy image gave way to the corporate look. Their stores lacked charm and a certain romance people associate with a coffee café.

The other, I suspect, is the original tie-in to traffic. People do not want to stop while gas prices are a large part of their budget. The more people carpool, take transit, get off the road, and telecommute, etc., the more this formula flips to badness.