Tuesday, July 22, 2008

Will someone explain this to me?

Mears said the man had been distraught after his wife told him she would be ending their relationship, and he waited in her off-post apartment until she came home late Thursday night.

When she arrived, Mears said, he stabbed her twice and forced her to drive with him to Las Vegas, Nevada.


How does that work? "I love you so much, honey, and I hate to think you're leaving, so I'll stab you a few times, and then we'll go have a honeymoon in Vegas." I mean, WTF?

Some folks sure do have a strange way of showing people that they love them. Whatever happened to, you know, flowers and a box of chocolates? That would probably get the message across to me better than shivving me in the ribs.

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

So, I take it you don't subscribe to the "You only hurt the ones you love" meme?

That meme makes no sense to me, and from what I've seen of your personality, you're far more likely to subscribe to the "you only hurt the ones who try & thug you" meme...

Brad K. said...

Tam,

Today we have delightful little ditties like, 'Maybe Next Time', tunefully defacing an expensive vehicle because her guy is messing around. We grew up with 'Pistol Packing Mama' by Al Dexter, "With some lead she shot him dead; His honkin' days are done". We watch TV shows and movies where a man or woman is 'punished' for tarnishing a(disrespectful, self-absorbed, callous) social image for someone with more ego than brains.

Mears' problem was butt-ugly ignorance. He dabbled in dating with not clue as for the reason - to build a family, to raise children. He did get the intense attachment of obsession and his ignorant version of 'devotion' - and the idiot thought that 'bought' him something from the lady involved.

Many people don't realize that there is grief involved in any loss. In Mears' case, the loss was a relationship with this lady. Looking from the outside, we often overlook the depth and impact of grief. To the one involved, though, grief is a function of their own feelings, their own attachments. The stages of grief are predictable, and often take a skilled outsider to help guide one through to healing. Denial, anger at the loss, acceptance, and healing are some of the seven distinct stages of grief over loss.

I imagine Bozo got carried away in Denial. And unlike sensible people, he immersed himself in thoughts of revenge ("I carved my name in his leather seats") and plans to 'win' her back.

I marvel at the number of people that will spend time with someone disrespectful. If you hang around a guy because he is 'exciting', ie, risk of danger or violence, his jealousy turning to anger and aggression should not be a surprise. If you respect the person you date, then it follows that you respect their decision to stop seeing you. She said 'No more' and he failed to respect her choice. You don't stop respecting someone all of a sudden - he had to have been disrespectful in small and large matters from the moment they met.

She picked a bozo, she settled for a lot less than respect, and thank goodness she survived to maybe learn something before selecting another disrespectful, 'exciting' date.

From Mike Shepherd's "Kris Longknife: Resolute", "A girl's mettle is proved by the dates she walks home from, not the ones she rides home with."

No, I am *not* saying she got what she deserved. This bozo was likely to blow in any direction, and this time there was only one victim. I do think she could have chosen to not be around this guy for his escalation in antisocial mayhem, or maybe have sought help in disengaging when the first warning flags showed.

Your article doesn't mention how much alcohol was involved at the beginning, during the relationship, or on the night of the attack.

CounterClckWise said...

See, that's why you'll never marry. IF a shiv in the ribs ain't a clear message of love, then gods know what else is.

Matt G said...

Hey, Brad K.-- Mears wasn't the actor in this love-voyage from one ugly desert city to another. The actor in that story wasn't actually named, because CNN says that they don't name sexual assault victims, and the actor's name might identify the victim.

Chris Mears is the El Paso Police Department officer acting as spokesman for the story.

Imagine that compilation road music CD:

"Cuts Like A Knife"
"I Want You To Love Me"
"Mac The Knife"
"Baby You Can Sleep While I Drive"
and maybe, just for the Johnny Cash value, "Delia." (Wrong weapon, I know.)

Charles Pergiel said...

I wuz gunna say yur no fun, but looks like CounterClckWise beat me to the punch, er shiv.

A friend of mine once said that some people don't get enough emotion in their lives, that's why they listen to country music. Sometimes they listen to the other kind, too. You know, Western.

Har, har, har, ain't I the funny one.

workinwifdakids said...

Britney Spears even had a song about it! Don't you remember? "Shank me baby one more time."

John B said...

note to self,

Send Tam flowers and chocolates! Maybe Menthol Marlboros, Ruben Sannys, and India Pale Ales.

At that point I wouldn't HAVE to use the shiv. An arterial scraper maybe.