Sunday, February 12, 2012

I hate it that I have to put this in reruns...

Attention DhimmicRATS, Rethuglicans, Libertardians, and anyone else I may be leaving out:

I do not own your particular political faction's decoder ring, nor am I likely to order one simply so I can figure out what you're saying or who you're talking about. For clarity's sake, please try and keep the Politi-Jargon to a minimum. Your forefathers spent centuries looting the vocabularies of the world to give you a beautiful and splendid language which we can all share and understand.

In the words of the great western philosopher, Jules Winnfield: "It's called English, m*%$#*%$&r! Do you speak it?"
.

23 comments:

Cincinnatus said...

Do they speak English in "What"?

Bob said...

Is "Paulbots" on the approved list? I see that you used it yourself, just a few posts down from this one.

JD Rush said...

Please don't take away Debbie "insert insulting name here"-Schultz. That would ruin my day. I promise to use it only when she says something stupid.....

Tam said...

Depends. Is the person actually a, you know, Paulbot?

By this I mean not just somebody who is going to vote for Ron Paul, but somebody who will not shut up about Ron Paul, and even perhaps attributes him with mysterious godlike powers, such that, were he to be elected, a new millennium of peace and love would dawn and the lion would lie down with the lamb?

'Cause if it's the latter, that's a Paulbot.

Ancient Woodsman said...

I've got an old Whig decoder ring you can borrow - I'm not using it anymore. For other-party-name-calling it's probably just as relevant as anything you'd get from any party today.

Found it in a box of Saleratus ;)

Guffaw in AZ said...

Dear Tam -
It's the same with uber-gunnie speak.
Some of us aren't in the higher echelon. We DO learn from you, though!

a new millennium of peace and love would dawn and the lion would lie down with the lamb?
"Yea, so the lion shall lie down with the lamb, but the lamb won't get much sleep." - Woody Allen

Bubblehead Les. said...

And what if your Forefathers weren't English?

Roberta X said...

Depends Les -- if you're talkin' English, you're using a language built of the very shiniest bits of every other language our (linguistic) forefathers could lay hands on, somewhat complicated by misdirected grammatical borrowings from Latin.

It turns out (paging Conrad!) you can do that no matter who your own personal forefathers were. The Englitch, she dunna' sae much care who speaka'da

Anonymous said...

I forget which prominent wiseass it was who said, "The English language doesn't just borrow words from other languages, it follows them down dark alleys at night, coshes them over the head, and rifles their pockets looking for their money and valuables."

Mike James

atlharp said...

Let me say this: As a former middle school civics teacher and political follower I severely despise the above jargon you noted. I find it needlessly annoying (more so than "More than a feeling" by Boston) and usually the telltale sign that someone usually has no depth of understanding about politics. In reality it's baby talk for the political minded (sic-or mindless) ;-)

Ken said...

Shouldn't that be RethugliKKKans? ;-)

wolfwalker said...

"The problem with defending the purity of the English language is that the English language is as pure as a crib-house whore. It not only borrows words from other languages; it has on occasion chased other languages down dark alley-ways, clubbed them unconscious and rifled their pockets for new vocabulary." ― James Nicoll

Wikipedia (grain-of-salt alert) identifies "James Nicoll" as an SF fan who wrote the above in a Usenet post in 1990. There's a variant that has the last phrase as "loose grammar." I can't tell which is the original, or if he actually wrote both at different times.

Critter said...

what is this English you are saying of?

the pawnbroker said...

But don't take my BOBO away...

It might be a rhyme, but it's acronymical, hilariously and accurately descriptive, and even comically self-applied (the first dog).

On second thought, DO take him away. Please.

Lanius said...

To quote that decent 2003 flick, Code 46..


1: Normans. Amazing.
1: They invented the whole English language out of nothing but French.
2: And some Latin, obviously.
1: Yeah, obviously.

Lewis said...

Wait, where on the spectrum do Paulbots fall in relation to us Paultards?

WV: endat. Whodat gonna endat Fed?

Kristophr said...

Do not awaken the Sheeple ...

Blackwing1 said...

Kristopher, you posted the link to XKCD I was going to stick up there!

Instead of "Paulbots", are we allowed to use, "Ronulans"? Doesn't much matter to me, I'm gonna vote for the Wookie.

Oops, maybe that's yet another one. These rules are confusing me (not a hard thing to do, though).

Can I still refer to the whole mess as being the DemoPublican Party? The two wings of the same vulture?

Spud said...

Easy...Bankruptcy gonna end dat Fed

Fuzzy Curmudgeon said...

"English is the result of Norman men-at-arms attempting to pick up Saxon barmaids and is no more legitimate than any of the other results."

-- H. Beam Piper, Fuzzy Sapiens

Brian N. said...

Blackwing1, it depends on what you're talking about...

I suppose one could be excessively fond of L. Neil Smith's Boot-on-Your-Neck as an epithet, but not by much. It describes the situation too damn well.

Vote BOYN! Our cannibal pot is the biggest in town!

Drang said...

Went back and read that post, now I'll never know if I came up with "Obamarama" as a blogpost tag or if I stole it from you. Damnit!

WV: odrat. Exactly!

Lanius said...

"English is the result of Norman men-at-arms attempting to pick up Saxon barmaids and is no more legitimate than any of the other results."

The Piper guy owes me five minutes I spent cleaning beer off my laptop screen..