Wednesday, May 07, 2014

Unpossible.

The local news claims that Dude A and Dude B got in an argument over a video game and, when Dude B would not leave Dude A's house, Dude A started shooting at his feet with (and I quote) a ".40 calibre gun". Which, you know, is apparently what one does to solve video game arguments and why I only play online these days.

Dude B hopped in his car to speed off to the hospital and get his gunshot feet looked at. Dude A hopped in his own car and tore off down the street to flee the scene of the crime (not demonstrating very good planning skills, since the scene of the crime was, in fact, Dude A's own house, to which one presumes he would eventually need to return.)

The po-po apprehended Dude A. According to this news report, though, Dude A has an alibi, in that he's a convicted felon and we know that they can't have guns because it's against the law. Further, even if he did have the gun, it can't be serious because:
Streit told police, "It wasn't like I was trying to kill him."
Well, heck, I know that when I'm not trying to kill somebody, shooting a gun at them is practically the first thing I do to prove it.

Cue cries to make it double secret illegal for felons to have guns in five, four, three...
.

12 comments:

fast richard said...

He was only trying to wound him, so that must be okay, right? It's not like there are any important bones in the feet and ankles or anything.

You might know more about that than I do.

Kevin said...

Dude A was "turning his life around," right? Oh, wait. No, that's when the guy dies.

When does his mother say "My baby didn't do nuffin'"?

Windy Wilson said...

No, no, no, they won't make it double secret illegal for felons to have guns, that's not the cause, it's because you and I have guns that he was able to miraculously change his finger into a gun, and the spoken words, "Bang, bang" into bullets that is the cause.

Jerry Shaw said...

Well, Of Course he wasn't trying to kill the dude. Otherwise he would use a .45 ACP.

Jerry Shaw said...

Well, OF COURSE he wasn't trying to kill the dude. Otherwise he would have used a .45 ACP.

Stuart the Viking said...

The cries won't be to make it double secret illegal for FELONS to have guns, they already have that.

The cries will be for more background checks. That seems to be their game lately. See, if Sumdood had been required to run a background check on Dude A before selling him that gun out of the back of a beat-up minivan, probably behind a strip club because "Exploitation!", then the Dude A clearly wouldn't have been able to get a gun! Without a gun, he probably wouldn't have even gotten mad that he sucks at video games!

Of course, if you disagree it means you want felons to have guns! On top of that, you want to see women be Exploited! Your opinion doesn't count, because WAR ON WOMEN!!!! (and RACIST!!! yea... yea... that's the ticket...).

s

Al T. said...

Reminds me of the local drug dealer who liked to shoot his under-performing subordinate salesmen in the feet with a .38 loaded with snake shot. Always nice to see young entrepreneurs thinking outside the box....

Joel said...

Cut him some slack. He comes from a broken home.

Matt said...

Just trying to teach Dude B to dance. nuttin wrong with that.

Jim said...

Dude B is gonna get a bunch of speeding tickets now.

Leadfoot driver.



Jim
Sunk New Dawn
Galveston, TX

Kristophr said...

That's a fair cop.

It's not as if he was some peasant with a weapon. Those are scary.

Matt G said...

Unlike what television has taught us, a round or two to the feet with a mid-to-high caliber round could absolutely kill a man, absent swift appropriate action.

In most states, force that can cause the loss of a limb is defined as "deadly force."

What say we charge Player A with Aggravated Assault With A Deadly Weapon, and push for 20 years?