Fluffy the Killer

The old joke goes: "Why are cats such assholes? Because they're God's perfect killing machines, but they're also tiny and adorable and humans keep scooping them up and talking baby talk to them."

At an adorable 3.5 pounds, the black-footed cat has the right to be among the crankiest of them all...

"Adorably big-eyed and smaller than a house cat, black-footed cats are far more successful at hunting than lions. They can jump up to five feet in the air and 6½ feet in distance; they kill eight to 14 meals per night and can eat 3,000 rodents a year.

“They’re considered the fierce cat,” said Bob Cisneros, Hogle Zoo’s associate director of animal care, who described kitten Gaia as a “mighty warrior.”

“These guys are voracious hunters,” he said."

That new resident at the Salt Lake City Zoo is pretty much fully grown at three pounds, which is about a fifth of the mass of Huck or Holden when they're in fighting trim. (Less than a fifth if we haven't been monitoring their dinner portions carefully.)

It looks like if I want to see black-footed cats, the closest ones are in Cleveland's Metroparks Zoo or the Brookfield Zoo in Chicago.

.

The most wholesome thing this week (so far)

Allow me to introduce you to the most ridiculous yet amazing thing you will see this week. pic.twitter.com/MHlGmz9Ph2

— fragrance and foolishness (@Brieyonce) February 27, 2023

The family that VROOOMs together...

It's the doggles on the pupper that make the photo...

click to embiggenate

D'awwwww!

Timeline cleanser:

The shock and awe on the face of this kitten upon realizing he has more than one paw to lick is just what I needed today...pic.twitter.com/P0dvx2Dbeg

— Rex Chapman🏇🏼 (@RexChapman) March 22, 2021

In case you needed a smile...

...here are some carpet sharks playing in packing peanuts. Guaranteed to make you smile.

The rest of the evening after some time with that goober Torm...

Not terrible. pic.twitter.com/KU5EYng4Uh

— OldManSethus (@OldManSethus) March 17, 2021

Huit Chevaux

Citroen announced a cute little almost-a-car electric runabout, a sort of 21st Century 2CV successor. Supposedly it's going to retail for under seven grand, and because of its low horsepower and maximum speed, it'll be treated like a scooter in several Euro countries.

It's unbearably twee and would make an awesome around-Broad Ripple inclement weather grocery fetcher.
.

Peak State Fair

This kid swarming up onto the tractor just made my day.
Peak State Fair, right there.#IndianaStateFair pic.twitter.com/UWscQRxh49

— Tamara K. (@TamSlick) August 19, 2018

"Oh god, it reeks of murder... Mustn't panic..."

When your sleep buddy is a cozy guinea pig.. pic.twitter.com/taWhXKBdXS

— Land of cuteness (@landpsychology) June 21, 2018

Here is cat video to keep you amuse.

Special puppy needs special home...

Major and Minor being puppies.

The Atomic Nerds have a special puppy that needs a special home.
.

A member of Future Politicians of America!

"But you have campaign contributions all over your face!"

This kid will go far in Washington.
.

Links, zwo, drei, vier...

1. Connecticut state lawmaker proposes making public the handgun carry permit holder database in the Nutmeg State. I don't mean to go all Godwin here, but I was moderately surprised when his rhetoric didn't close with "demonstrations against gun owners should not be prepared or organized by the party, but insofar as they erupt spontaneously, they are not to be hampered."


2. Sebastian breaks down the WaPo article on the forthcoming Administration assault on your Second Amendment rights.


3. AGirlAndHerGun posted some family range time pics. That looks like fun! I need to shoot long guns more.


4. Remember that 'world without guns' post I wrote the other day? Well, Tim at Gun Nuts Media took the ball and ran with that sucker. Expect to find this essay in your email inbox within the next six months, credited to a "Maj. Caudill, USMC".

Intermission

...or are you happy to see me?

In your best Apu from The Simpsons voice, say the following phrase out loud: "Pardon me, sir, but there seems to be a monkey in your pants."

That's right, a guy got busted at the New Delhi airport with a slender loris down his trousers. He was apparently trying to board a flight for Dubai when either someone noticed his crotchal area was more animated than it should be, or the crotch fondler at the customs checkpoint got his hand fondled right back.

However it happened, they discovered he had the little fellow in there with his little fellow and was trying to get the critter, which is on both the Endangered Species and Cutest Animal lists, out of the country, an act that is strictly verboten.

Knowing the attitude of wealthy Emirates citizens towards anything that smacks of work, I'm wondering if this guy was the intended future owner of said loris, or just a hired smuggler? And if the latter, did he use the line so familiar to any cop in America: "I don't know how that got in there! These aren't even my pants anyway, they're Sumdood's! I didn't know he had a monkey in there!"

At any rate, Story. Of. The. Year.

Welcome To The Future.

I may have mentioned that every time the last happy little singing frog in that FedEx commercial disappears, I die a little inside.

Thankfully, FedEx craftily found a way to make a buck off my verklemptness: Look what I found at Kinko's The FedEx Store today!



He rode home in the passenger seat of the Zed Drei with a big, happy grin on his face, safe from evil FedUPS drivers...

Incidentally, not having been in a Kinko's FedEx store recently, I was taken aback at how handy it is to print out a .pdf file in your shiny modern world. Just stick your card and your USB thumb drive in the printer, select the .pdf file off the touchscreen, and fire away. I wanted to tell Middle School Tam, who had paid a nickel a page to photocopy the best parts of the Tolkien Bestiary back in the day, so I took a picture with my phone, but couldn't figure out how to send it to Ma Bell back in the '80s...



I'm sure my thumb drive picked up stuxnet, which will now attack the weapons-grade uranium centrifuges in the basement... (ATTENTION NSA: THAT WAS A JOKE.)

You want the cute? You can't handle the cute!

Puppies generally tend towards cuteness, but Marko wasn't kidding when he said that Henry was pretty cute even for a puppy.

There's a step up to the hallway at the back of the house that is dachsie territory, and said step has about a ten-inch riser, which is to say 'over a dachshund's head.' Guinevere, Henry's grandmother, is slowing down a bit and tends to take it with a hop and a bit of scrabble, while her three children clear it on the run like cruise missiles in terrain-following mode.

Henry, on the other hand, will try to emulate his mother and uncles by charging headlong at it, only to wind up chinning himself on the step two or three times as though he were trying to catch Bob Saget's attention. I will try to capture this on video. If I do, you will say "Awwwww," because you won't be able to help it.

The standard response on the internet...

...when faced with a total case of writer's block is to say "Look! A cute cat video!"





The thing with Huck is that, being a cat, he doesn't associate being asked to do something with getting a reward for obedience; he just realizes that when he flips on his back, a snack is produced, so any time you're in the kitchen and he's feeling peckish, you'll hear the basement door start thumping against its jamb as Huck is intently somersaulting away, looking up at you expectantly between reps, wondering why you aren't breaking out the treat bag.

Video courtesy of my roomie.

 .

Cutest. Ever.

Robb Allen introduces his little girl to the joys of shootin' with an air rifle.

Judging from the pictures, if she'd been any happier, she might have exploded or something.

Awwww!

I got all lump-in-the-throat kinda early this morning. You can, too.

.

When camouflage fails...

...you can always try the tactic of being made out of pure weapons-grade cute-onium.

On "Three". Ready? One... Two... Awwww!


.