Sunday, April 06, 2008

Read carefully.

So, the headline read "India offers firearms permits for vasectomies."

But out of the corner of my eye, I saw "Indiana offers firearms for vasectomies," and I thought "Hell's bells! I'm buying a case of Boone's Farm, renting a van, and going to the bus station right now!"

"Hey, you! Want a bottle of Ripple? Hop in..."
@

17 comments:

  1. Anonymous7:54 PM, April 06, 2008

    'They're a press gang. They convince drunks and vagrants to become sailors.'

    'What happens when they sober up?'

    'They're at sea.'

    ReplyDelete
  2. Anonymous8:04 PM, April 06, 2008

    They don't make ripple anymore.

    Thunderbird and Night Train are still available though.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Tam8:06 PM, April 06, 2008

    Note To Self Before Renting Van...

    ReplyDelete
  4. Jeffro8:14 PM, April 06, 2008

    Performing a valuable public service and getting guns? What could be wrong about that?

    ReplyDelete
  5. staghounds8:54 PM, April 06, 2008

    Spell check, Jeffro!

    And I had to pay for mine...

    ReplyDelete
  6. Anonymous9:16 PM, April 06, 2008

    What can I get? I have had all the kids I ever need to have. PLus, there's a body of evidence that suggests I should not reproduce anyway. If I could get a Merkel double out of it in 470 nitro express, wiht Octagonal barrels, I would let them do it with a can opener. And broadcast it on Youtube.

    I'd probably end up with a rusty surplus 99/44.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Turk Turon9:54 PM, April 06, 2008

    Is the offer retroactive?

    ReplyDelete
  8. Anonymous10:17 PM, April 06, 2008

    Note that the result will be that law abiding indians will forgo children for a gun whereas the criminals will take the illegal gun and keep on having children. Encouraging criminal population enlargement and lowering the number of honest people. If the place isn't a total hell hole now it will be in 25 years

    ReplyDelete
  9. Turk Turon10:51 PM, April 06, 2008

    There must be easier ways to build up your gun collection.

    (Well, it says,"Read carefully.")

    ReplyDelete
  10. Anonymous11:10 PM, April 06, 2008

    I'll bet there is a sudden cottage industry of beggars who will offer to go get a vasectomy while carrying your ID so you can get a gun permit.

    Another India-Scam is born ...

    ReplyDelete
  11. phlegmfatale11:25 PM, April 06, 2008

    I haven't laughed that hard in, oh, a week or so. Thanks!

    ReplyDelete
  12. BryanP8:01 AM, April 07, 2008

    Hell, I've already has one. Where do I sign up for my free gun?

    Oh, and whoever decided that is classified as minor surgery should be forced to get one. When scalpels and cauteries are that close to The Special Place there's nothing minor about it.

    "Doc, I smell something burning. Doc?"

    BryanP

    ReplyDelete
  13. Frank W. James9:08 AM, April 07, 2008

    Yeah, just don't pull an LBJ and show me the scar.

    All The Best,
    Frank W. James

    ReplyDelete
  14. Matt G9:43 AM, April 07, 2008

    It's nice that they recognize that the real danger to society is their overpopulation, rather than firearms.

    HTRN: and also MD 20/20.

    Jeffro: It's actually a valuable pubic service...

    Byran: Calcutta.

    ReplyDelete
  15. Anonymous10:17 AM, April 07, 2008

    Overpopulation is not an issue but rather overpopulation of idiots, thugs, and welfare rats. I think offering sterilization for free Cheetos might hit our target market rather effectively.

    ReplyDelete
  16. Jeffro10:59 AM, April 07, 2008

    staghounds said...

    Spell check, Jeffro!

    and

    Matt G said...

    Jeffro: It's actually a valuable pubic service...

    That's me, straight man to the stars...

    ReplyDelete
  17. Anonymous2:10 AM, April 08, 2008

    Matt:

    Yah, forgot about "Mad Dog".

    Interestingly enough, box wine is starting to get decent. VRAC springs to mind..

    ReplyDelete

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