Saturday, June 27, 2009

This just in...

Michael Jackson is still dead.

30 comments:

  1. And I bet Elvis is kicking his ass!

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  2. And yet: Even after being steeped in the wailings of demen - erm, make that dedicated fans, the sack cloth and ashes donned by the talking heads, and yeah unto him even the appearance of Jesse Jackson with the family - the ol' world still keeps on turning. Amazing, that.

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  3. OK, bring on the day! I've had my morning bowl of snark and skim milk and I'm spun up... 8)

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  4. It hasn't been 3 days yet. Just wait until tomorrow morning.

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  5. And the little boys of the world are sleeping safely in their beds....

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  6. Along with General Franco...

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  7. Oh, please assure there won't be a . . . wardrobe . . . malfunction tomorrow!

    I wonder how Frank Sinatra and Ludwig von Beethoven welcome MJ, and whether MJ finds solace with Eva Peron, Cleopatra, Helen of Troy, whether he winds up chasing an aloof Mama Cass - or dodging Liberace. At least Liberace would understand . . . the glitter . . .

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  8. No he's not.

    He's hanging out in the pediatrics ward, having a stroke.

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  9. John Peddie (Toronto)11:21 AM, June 27, 2009

    Guess the Man Upstairs plays with an even hand.

    He snuffed Mike to improve the world's gene pool, and as atonement for taking Farrah.

    As if either really mattered.

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  10. Target's having a MJ sale next week in his honor:

    Boy's pant's half off.

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  11. I heard that Heath Ledger dude died!

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  12. Are you syre? Did you pay attention to the "Thriller" video?

    He may be after brains as we speak -- and he damn sure isn't going to find them among the toady sycophants currently whitewashing (heh) his weirdness.

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  13. Are you sure Tam?

    There hasn't been anything in the news about it.

    Just lots of coverage of two wars and a collapsing economy.

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  14. I wonder when the Larry King interview with Bubbles the Chimp and Elizabeth Taylor will be aired? And will Bubbles be allowed to attend the funeral?

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  15. He is? NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

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  16. Uh, Somerled, wasn't Bubbles abandoned by him when he turned from a cute little thing into a big mean adult male?

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  17. AD, oh man... I'm glad I didn't have food in my mouth when I read that.

    Jim

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  18. Stopping off for a burger, I noticed the new McJacko.

    50-year aged meat jammed between 8-year-old buns.

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  19. Well, he won't be blowing bubbles in the bathtub anymore. Bubbles is sad.

    Darn it, all these jokes and double entendre's that are no longer good anymore, now that MJ's dead. Michael, you helped me make people laugh more than any other real live person.

    Oh, for one final go, before I retire my repertoire: when is it bed time at the Neverland Ranch? When the big hand is on the little hand...

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  20. Comments from the Facebook "REMEMBERING MICHAEL JACKSON!!!!" group:

    "He was a brave soul. He lived outside the box. It s ashamed there arent more people like he was. All our great leaders are gone. God be with his children."

    "It's just not possible. I'm still waiting to see if he will rise again on the third day..."

    I only wish I was making this up. Excuse me while I go hurl.

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  21. And why is Jesse Jackson demanding a new autopsy?He's not even one of the right Jacksons.
    Is there anything in popular culture he won't stick his headline grabbing face into?

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  22. And I'm still happy he's dead.

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  23. Yeah, just can't work up a lot of grief here. Hated the Jackson Five, hated every phase of Whacko Jacko, wanted to hurl every time I saw that alarming surgery-damaged face on the tube while he was coming apart a few years ago.

    Didn't wish him (very much) harm except for the business with the pedophilia, really. Just...not very sorry he's dead.

    He was a helluva dancer, though. I gotta give him that.

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  24. "Stopping off for a burger, I noticed the new McJacko.

    50-year aged meat jammed between 8-year-old buns."

    Yes, 50-year old aged meat with mostly plastic filler.

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  25. Joe, Joel--

    Yep.

    WV: thropipt-- appreciative sound made after a meal of human liver and a nice chianti

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  26. So who gets to buy the Beatles catalog from his estate?

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  27. "Jackson 5 Reunion Tour Tickets-- 20% Off!"

    Sorry, couldn't resist.

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  28. Joined by Billy Mays, now.

    Word Verification: Midar - kind of what happened when Billy Mays got bonked in the head during the hard landing the other day, probably bursting a blood vessel in his brain, etc...

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