I got bored while waiting for the VW/Audi dealership gnomes to install some extremely expensive piece of Hunnish hardware in my GTI. I wandered into the showroom to see what was new & shiny, and plopped into the nearest sedan and started pushing buttons and flipping switches. An extremely anxious salesdrone couldn't get me out of the car quickly enough, and it wasn't until I glanced at the window sticker that I had a clue that an Audi A8 with all the bells & whistles could be swapped pretty much dead even for the 3/2 house I was living in...
I see your German auto fetish is rising once more. My taste runs more along Ford Expedition lines myself (used to be GMC Yukons but I won't support Gov't Motors anymore.)
Yeah, after that commercial, I wouldn't buy an Audi even if the only other alternative was a Trabant. I love their dystopian view of the future where greenies have taken over and get their jollies roughing up styrofoam cup drinkers.
I like Unc's idea of driving a big Ford Earthfucker with the optional baby seal seats. http://www.saysuncle.com/2010/02/09/ad-fail-2/ Oh, and just WTF is that animal on the leash by the truck, an anteater? If so, why???
I'll not be having any of the Audi brand, thankyouverymuch, and yes, the commercial pissed me right off.
The Subie will be good to go for a good while longer, and though they are about as big a Lib-wagon (short of the Prius) as they'd lead you to believe in their commercials, at least they are doing the peace/fluffy clouds/love angle. Subaru adds just make me want to puke, not commit mass murder.
Had a VW. The only parts on it that didn't go TU were the Audi ones. Shame. I'll never EVER have and Audi now. That 'mercial put it on my “never even look at list” with Government Motors, Chrysler, and Porsche (only pricks drive those Nazi Ass-winder* heritage cars!)
We've got an R8 for sale in the paper up here in Vail. The tag line reads, "Tired of not being able to drive your Ferrari, Lamborghini, or Bently in the Winter. Try all-wheel drive."
I like the Audi enough that I wish they wouldn't give it the Green stamp of approval; it was the kiss of death for the Prissy, I mean Prius, but that was hilarious.
"Next thing you know when you stick it in, the m'er f'er will just f'n explode."
(thx to e. murphy in his aids bit, but he wasn't talking about putting keys in ignitions).
I feel some pity for Audi. The TDI is an engineering marvel by all accounts, and right frugal with fuel. Yet here in the US you can't sell diesel passenger vehicles to anyone except for the alt-fuelers in ancient Vanagons with bumper stickers that read "Biodiesel: French Fry Power!" and "0-60 in FIVE MINUTES." I was stuck behind one such only yesterday, and it didn't add much to the commute.
All other car buyers either seem to think that diesels only come in filth-belching flavors or that they will be buying a slow, complex, high maintenance nightmare. As for the commercial - if one hadn't realized it was intentionally absurd before the appearance of the car-sniffing aardvark, then one surely should've by the time the 'regular' police had been told to "put 'em on the hood." I'm still rewatching and laughing three days later. I guess it succeeded after all.
"That 'mercial put it on my “never even look at list” with Government Motors, Chrysler, and Porsche (only pricks drive those Nazi Ass-winder* heritage cars!)"
Oh, jeeze, an ad agency made a dumb commercial. Like that's a new event.
And the P.J. O'Rourke quote is "Ass-engine Nazi slot car", from the essay "Ferrari Refutes the Decline of the West". I've never read PJ saying anything bad about the cars themselves. Lord knows I liked both of mine...
german JUNK The worst cars that have ever ome out of the fatherland! Just the name means repair every day due to the bad design of many of the green parts.
If I'm laying out cash for (another) German car and fueling the thing regularly it will be this one - with a manual trans and sport package, thanks. My wife's 328xi is too thirsty.
Had 2 Audi 4000s, back in the bad old days when I was married...one for me and a new one for the wife...got sick and tired of sliding under the dang things every year to change out the starters...when she left she took her krautmobile and I traded mine on a Ford Taurus. Been happier ever since.
I stand corrected on the direct quote about the Nazi Poop-Shoot Power Plant. I lost my copy of “Republican Party Reptile” a ways back and always remembered it as “Nazi ass-winding slot car” BTW: his description of “apexing a turn” still makes me giggle when I think about it.
The personal feeling of those cars comes from the observation of those who tend towards driving them. "Middle" aged men on their 3rd trophy "wife" (complete with tail antlers and a "wet ink fresh” GED). I think you get the Porsche free when you buy hair implants and a double set of veneers for you and your new bride. Also comes with a side of “Pre-nup”.
The Green Police won't approve, but I'd love an Audi RS6 wagon to tote the wife and twins about. 572 hp should get us to wherever we are going rather promptly.
I thought you were more of a vert gal?
ReplyDeletehttp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Audi_R10_TDI
I got bored while waiting for the VW/Audi dealership gnomes to install some extremely expensive piece of Hunnish hardware in my GTI. I wandered into the showroom to see what was new & shiny, and plopped into the nearest sedan and started pushing buttons and flipping switches. An extremely anxious salesdrone couldn't get me out of the car quickly enough, and it wasn't until I glanced at the window sticker that I had a clue that an Audi A8 with all the bells & whistles could be swapped pretty much dead even for the 3/2 house I was living in...
ReplyDeleteI see your German auto fetish is rising once more. My taste runs more along Ford Expedition lines myself (used to be GMC Yukons but I won't support Gov't Motors anymore.)
ReplyDeleteYou'd look nice dressed in one of those. :-)
ReplyDeleteYeah, after that commercial, I wouldn't buy an Audi even if the only other alternative was a Trabant. I love their dystopian view of the future where greenies have taken over and get their jollies roughing up styrofoam cup drinkers.
ReplyDeleteI like Unc's idea of driving a big Ford Earthfucker with the optional baby seal seats. http://www.saysuncle.com/2010/02/09/ad-fail-2/ Oh, and just WTF is that animal on the leash by the truck, an anteater? If so, why???
I'll not be having any of the Audi brand, thankyouverymuch, and yes, the commercial pissed me right off.
ReplyDeleteThe Subie will be good to go for a good while longer, and though they are about as big a Lib-wagon (short of the Prius) as they'd lead you to believe in their commercials, at least they are doing the peace/fluffy clouds/love angle. Subaru adds just make me want to puke, not commit mass murder.
Audi A2 1.2TDI, 68mpg. :-)
ReplyDeleteBest car ever.
Had a VW. The only parts on it that didn't go TU were the Audi ones. Shame. I'll never EVER have and Audi now. That 'mercial put it on my “never even look at list” with Government Motors, Chrysler, and Porsche (only pricks drive those Nazi Ass-winder* heritage cars!)
ReplyDelete*long live P.J.!
From Joe in PNG:
ReplyDeleteFunny how the Bugatti Veyron is also, technically, from Audi. 1001 hp, 253mph top speed, and a carbon footprint almost as big as Algore's.
Hey Green Police! Just try to keep up with this! (Drives off with "Red Barchetta" playing on the stereo)...
We've got an R8 for sale in the paper up here in Vail. The tag line reads, "Tired of not being able to drive your Ferrari, Lamborghini, or Bently in the Winter. Try all-wheel drive."
ReplyDeleteBrass
I like the Audi enough that I wish they wouldn't give it the Green stamp of approval; it was the kiss of death for the Prissy, I mean Prius, but that was hilarious.
ReplyDelete"Next thing you know when you stick it in, the m'er f'er will just f'n explode."
(thx to e. murphy in his aids bit, but he wasn't talking about putting keys in ignitions).
AT
I feel some pity for Audi. The TDI is an engineering marvel by all accounts, and right frugal with fuel. Yet here in the US you can't sell diesel passenger vehicles to anyone except for the alt-fuelers in ancient Vanagons with bumper stickers that read "Biodiesel: French Fry Power!" and "0-60 in FIVE MINUTES." I was stuck behind one such only yesterday, and it didn't add much to the commute.
ReplyDeleteAll other car buyers either seem to think that diesels only come in filth-belching flavors or that they will be buying a slow, complex, high maintenance nightmare. As for the commercial - if one hadn't realized it was intentionally absurd before the appearance of the car-sniffing aardvark, then one surely should've by the time the 'regular' police had been told to "put 'em on the hood." I'm still rewatching and laughing three days later. I guess it succeeded after all.
Dantesfiringrange,
ReplyDelete"That 'mercial put it on my “never even look at list” with Government Motors, Chrysler, and Porsche (only pricks drive those Nazi Ass-winder* heritage cars!)"
Oh, jeeze, an ad agency made a dumb commercial. Like that's a new event.
And the P.J. O'Rourke quote is "Ass-engine Nazi slot car", from the essay "Ferrari Refutes the Decline of the West". I've never read PJ saying anything bad about the cars themselves. Lord knows I liked both of mine...
That commercial didn't put me off buying an Audi.
ReplyDelete*AUDI* put me off buying an Audi...
The Green Police was bad in so many ways that I'm surprised it made it to air time.
ReplyDeleteAudi, the third best car company in Germany, just like Chrysler is here.
Gerry
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mCzCXyQ-bv0
ReplyDeletegerman JUNK The worst cars that have ever ome out of the fatherland! Just the name means repair every day due to the bad design of many of the green parts.
ReplyDeleteYour shift key was made by Audi, I take it? ;)
ReplyDeleteIf I'm laying out cash for (another) German car and fueling the thing regularly it will be this one - with a manual trans and sport package, thanks. My wife's 328xi is too thirsty.
ReplyDeletehttp://www.caranddriver.com/reviews/car/09q2/2008_bmw_123d-short_take_road_test
Saw an R8 in real life for the first time recently, and was surprised at how compact it is. Nice car.
ReplyDeleteYes, A. D. had an R8 in France this year- it came up right behind me in the farm yard. Wide, low, and RUMBLY.
ReplyDeleteI like the Green Police adverts, they are a send up of the green dream.
WE are the ones with the sense of humor, remember?
I'll take a Type C. Audi won't make money offen it, and the Green Police won't be able to catch it.
ReplyDeleteHad 2 Audi 4000s, back in the bad old days when I was married...one for me and a new one for the wife...got sick and tired of sliding under the dang things every year to change out the starters...when she left she took her krautmobile and I traded mine on a Ford Taurus. Been happier ever since.
ReplyDeletecap'n chumbucket
Tam, your second choice looks like a real kidney buster. Us old folk think of those kinda things.
ReplyDeleteheh
Co-worker has Audi V-10 Quattro sedan with 450 ponies going to all 4 wheels.
ReplyDeleteI giggle like a schoolgirl whenever she takes me to lunch in that car. Good thing she's a PhD so she can afford new tires all the time...
I stand corrected on the direct quote about the Nazi Poop-Shoot Power Plant. I lost my copy of “Republican Party Reptile” a ways back and always remembered it as “Nazi ass-winding slot car” BTW: his description of “apexing a turn” still makes me giggle when I think about it.
ReplyDeleteThe personal feeling of those cars comes from the observation of those who tend towards driving them. "Middle" aged men on their 3rd trophy "wife" (complete with tail antlers and a "wet ink fresh” GED). I think you get the Porsche free when you buy hair implants and a double set of veneers for you and your new bride. Also comes with a side of “Pre-nup”.
The Green Police won't approve, but I'd love an Audi RS6 wagon to tote the wife and twins about. 572 hp should get us to wherever we are going rather promptly.
ReplyDelete