Tuesday, July 27, 2010

A what-by shooting where?

When the TeeWee news announcer this morning intoned that two teens had been capped in a drive-by shooting in Zionsville, it had about the same effect on the smooth flow of my train of thought as would driving down a highway in North Dakota and running over an alligator.

For those unfamiliar with our metro Naptown geography, Zionsville is a small town in the northern outer 'burbs with a hopelessly twee main street given over to antique shops and old Victorians and the surrounding environs given over to homes ranging from large to ostentatious where one can sleep in bucolic peace and quiet after a hard day of middle managementing in downtown Indy.

I blame that jazz music these kids are listening to these days. It makes them smoke marijuana and hang out with hoodlums and flappers.


UPDATE: The official story now is that Seth & Jared say they drove home to Zionsville from Indy after being capped out of the blue while they were sitting in their car all minding their own business and not doing anything wrong, honest, officer.

21 comments:

  1. Given that they were shot at what was most likely point blank range and only suffered minor injuries, it's possible it was a BB gun used.

    That would not be inconsistent with life in the 'burbs, at least not as I've known them lo these many years...

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  2. According to what I hear, one was hit in the arm and the other in the chin, neither of which is necessarily immediately fatal with a .44 Magnum.

    Judging by the glass on the passenger-side window of the car, I'm going to guess 'tweren't a BB gun.

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  3. BBs will shatter car glass try it sometime

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  4. damned kids all hopped up on goofballs!!

    wv: Grank. Grampa+crank

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  5. "BBs will shatter car glass try it sometime"

    I know.

    Just not usually after going through somebody, they won't.

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  6. Brazen flapper hussies! Next thing you know, there'll be a pool hall in that town. Right there in River City!

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  7. "BBs will shatter car glass try it sometime"

    Many many many years ago, an errant BB touched the corner of my sisters 1963 Chevy Impalas rear window. The entire window exploded like a Hollywood special effect mans wet dream.

    An expensive lesson at a young age on rule #4.

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  8. According to the story, the shooting was (reportedly) in Marion County - but I-65 near I-465' is rather vague. Trust me - if there had been a shooting in Zionsville, I would have heard (about) it. Yeah, it's that quiet here.

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  9. "According to the story, the shooting was (reportedly) in Marion County - but I-65 near I-465' is rather vague."

    Ah.

    That hadn't come out yet at 0600.

    That makes sense. Seth & Jared decided to go downtown...

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  10. "UPDATE: The official story now is that Seth & Jared say they drove home to Zionsville from Indy after being capped out of the blue while they were sitting in their car all minding their own business and not doing anything wrong, honest, officer."

    While waiting for church to open so they could sing in the choir. Sumdood strikes again!

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  11. We weren't doing nothing.

    Some dude gave us the car.

    These aren't my pants.

    Great lines of a heard by police officers every day for their entire careers.

    Gerry

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  12. Libertine men and scarlet women, and ragtime!

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  13. Idjits, don't they know that sitting in a car and MingYOB is, statistically, the most dangerous thing a young man can do?

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  14. "a hopelessly twee main street given over to antique shops and old Victorians"

    Hey, don't forget The Friendly!

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  15. do the phrse "These aren't my pants" work????

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  16. Aaand it gets even more interesting.

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  17. I sense that my arch enemy Sumdood is the culprit here.

    And Seth and Jared should have known better. Statistically speaking, sitting around minding your own business is one of the most dangerous things you can do in any city.

    Ask anyone in the ER who was beaten/shot/stabbed, and you'll find that 95% of them were doing just that.

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  18. Holy crap, I live in z-ville! You mean to say I'm not 100% safe here in the burbs?

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  19. Homer and Jethro got it right on "Homer and Jethro at the Supper Club" - "We don't drink; and we don't chew; and we don't go; where there's girls that do!"

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  20. Three teens drinking, out at 2:30AM. That'll find trouble. In this case, the cops're saying that it wasn't random; they were targeted.

    Boyz iz stoopid even B4 being crunk drunk.

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  21. Sumdood. One day AD (or Lawdog or maybe MattG) is going to catch that guy, and when they do...

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