Wednesday, April 06, 2011

Just because, that's why!

In case you were wondering, CNN had an article patiently explaining "Why Libya 2011 Is Not Iraq 2003." Here, à la Letterman, are the Top Ten Reasons that Libya is not Iraq:
10. Libya's totally on a different continent. Duh!

9. George Bush was dumb.

8. Halliburton is a much eviller company than Agip, and doesn't have as cool a logo, either.

7. Because cool countries like Spain and Italy are doing it too!

6. Errrm... uh....

5. Kha... Qa... Gadhafi supposedly had a nuclear program once, but dropped it for some reason. He might have started it back up!

4. RACIST!

3. Kha... Qa... Gadhafi was oppressing his citizens and killing them. On TV!

2. We totally have an exit strategy this time. Mission Accomplished!

1. He may be a bumbling warmonger, but he's our bumbling warmonger.

23 comments:

  1. I love how the article left out a very important difference. Bush had a vote from congress to engage in war. Not that it appears to count for anything since nobody who was in congress at the time has memory of anything they did before 2008.

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  2. 6 is also "George Bush was dumb" but filtered through bongwater.

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  3. I think they left one out:

    0. Øbama is Awesome.

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  4. Does this headline count as one of those "abuses and usurpations," thingies that sumdood was nattering on about a couple hundred plus years ago?

    'Cuz I say it is.

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  5. I think 6 had something to do with Sarah Palin.

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  6. Obama is a much better president than Bush. Obama has only started half of the wars that Bush started.

    Unless you count the one between two useless political parties.

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  7. @Nathan: Since #1 *really* refers to Obama, that takes care of your #0.

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  8. #11 "We don't need no stinkin' congressional resolution" [/Blazing Saddles Mexican voice]

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  9. Dammit, let Reagan be Reagan!

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  10. Nice that CNN felt the need to do what The Dear Golfer can't do for himself, i.e. explain WTF we're doing there in the first place.

    Jeebus, they need a bloody tanker truck to carry all that water, don't they?

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  11. docjim505,

    "Jeebus, they need a bloody tanker truck to carry all that water, don't they?"

    ...and the tank needs to be big enough for the entire MSM to get in it. :D

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  12. "This is all quite in contrast to George W. Bush's ineffectual attempts to gather international support for the invasion of Iraq in 2003."

    "The Bush administration's largely unilateral decision to go to war in Iraq (the U.K. and a few other nations provided troops) undermined America's standing in Islamic countries."

    On behalf of Australia and every one of the other 39 countries that have deployed troops to support the US's unilateral Iraq invasion so far I just want to tell Mr. Bergen that "We hate you to."

    I do think you're being a bit inaccurate in your summary of his arguments though. I may have missed something, but his argument seemed to come down to "The Arab League said jump, and Obama jumped, while the Arab League said don't jump and Bush jumped anyway; therefore Bush bad, Obama good."

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  13. Carnac sez: David Letterman and Mua... wait, Moa- Mua... Muamar -jeeze- Gad... Khod... Ghadaffy - Who are two old media whores who take advantage of their station and pork young chicks.

    word: asmop

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  14. 6. This is a PEACEFUL war mission, 'cuz this president has a Nobel Peace Prize!

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  15. docjim505,
    "Jeebus, they need a bloody tanker truck to carry all that water, don't they?"

    ...and the tank needs to be big enough for the entire MSM to get in it. :D

    Ooh! Ooh! Can we fill it to the rim, and then seal the lid?

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  16. *I'm sorry, but the definitive Number One Reason was given by Little Blonde Bobble Head down at "Wow"...

    "I don't care, Obama is awesome."

    It's how he got where he is, and how we got where we are.

    AT

    *Damn it, Nathan...scribbled this before I saw yours, but I'm lazy so I ran it anyway.

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  17. "It's how he got where he is, and how we got where we are."

    It's also who they truly are. There is nothing genuine about them, except their dishonesty. I truly believe they believe their own bullshit at this point. Tam brought up a great point about their disconnect from reality. It's startlingly surreal in a very schizophrenic fashion. Hearing things that aren't there, seeing things that don't exist. I mean we put people in nursing homes for less!

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  18. "Because Shut-up that's why!"

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  19. atlharp:

    Jesus Christ, what happened to Peppard?

    :)

    AT

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  20. "Strikingly absent from those protests has been the ritualized burning of American flags, something that hitherto was largely pro forma in that part of the world. That's because Arabs have finally been able to express publicly that their biggest enemy is not the United States, but their own rulers."

    1. He needs to watch the news.

    2.And Neither Iraq nor Afghanistan have aaaaanything to do with that.

    (I say that as one who believes the execution of the GWB wars was criminally awful.)

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  21. Nathan and AT, you forgot the hand wave!

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  22. More cowbell.

    http://fyitup.ytmnd.com

    (Loud audio, may not be SFW.)

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  23. The Arabs have a saying. "The camel smiles because it knows the 100th name of Allah."

    It ought to be amended to add, "The camel spits because it knows the 100th Spelling of Khaddaffi."

    I'm convinced they've re-animated the late Peter Sellers and propped him up in a chair somewhere in Brussels. If not, someone ought to; this war-that-ain't-a-war was tailor-made for him.

    gvi

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