Shootin' Buddy called the other day. His friend with whom he normally goes to gun school had taken a spill and hurt his shoulder and was listed as day-to-day. Just in case, would I want to step into the on-deck circle for an upcoming three-day Awerbuck Shotgun I class? I mean, since it was already paid for and everything?
Duh. "Hey, kid! Want some free ice cream?" Uh, yes.
Phone rings this morning. It's official, his friend is out and said he'd be cool with me taking his slot. Awesome!
When's the class?
Tomorrow.
Uh...
I call down to the dental school, but because of the way the students are scheduled, it's not like they can just bump me back to Friday or Monday. Oh, no; the next morning opening for my almost-a-dentist is two weeks out and there's an afternoon slot (which I hate) a week and a half away. And I can tell from the tone that re-scheduling would be viewed as a little uncool, because my case is my student's competency exam and tomorrow's appointment is one more than we'd initially planned on anyway.
I am missing a free trip to gun school because of a dentist appointment. I am going to be sitting in that chair tomorrow, with my face numb and my teeth getting poked and scraped down below the gum line and thinking "Right now I could be at a shooting range, using somebody else's pimped 870, shooting somebody else's ammo, on a free trip to gun school." I am typing this through actual tears of frustration.
I swear, some days it's not worth getting out of bed.
.
ACK!!! That is bad luck. :(
ReplyDeleteYeeouch. It might suck more if you'd written to report you've been diagnosed with leprosy. Not a lot more, though. My condolences.
ReplyDeleteOn the other hand, somebody cares enough about you to offer the free class, gun, and ammo.
ReplyDeleteThat's the gift that keeps on giving...
Stoopid Teef!
ReplyDelete"Gloom, Despair & Agony on me!!"
ReplyDeleteEspecially the agony part. Man, I hate sitting in the dentist's chair.
I'd stand up the almost-a-doctor, and figure out the make-up later!
ReplyDeleteWorst case scenario they make you new teeth out of wood, just like Gen George!
Oh Tam, that's terrible, Louie's Shotgun Class is beyond fantastic. Hand's down I prefer him to any other instructor I've trained with.
ReplyDeleteThink of your new "Pepsodent Smile" and stop torturing yourself about what could've been.
ReplyDeleteHope you get better soon!
Ulises from CA
Sport Pilot,
ReplyDeleteHe is a very good teacher. I've had Handgun I and Carbine/Pistol with him so far and was really looking forward to more. :(
Maybe next year.
Weer'd: part of what you agree to for cheap dental service at a dental school is conforming to the school's schedule.
ReplyDeleteTough luck indeed. I concur that Awerbuck is exceptional when it comes to shotguns, especially pump shotguns. A lot of instructors run pump shotguns the way you would run a semi auto by assuming that the bolt will be back after the last shot. Awerbuck's thesis is that for simplicity and consistency, you should load exclusively to the mag tube and not through the ejection port with the bolt back, because the bolt should almost always be forward.
ReplyDeleteThat sucks. But the way Murphy's Law works, if your teeth were fine, there'd be a Malf with the 870 that would break a tooth or something, so you'd be in the Dentist Chair anyway. Murphy's a Jerk like that, you know.
ReplyDeleteAw man! Well, at least the saga of the teeth will be finished.
ReplyDeleteI feel for you Tam. I have a Dentist appointment Thurs. Maybe I'll cancel and go to the range in your name.
ReplyDeleteJumpthestack: What you say about Awerbuck's views on always loading from the tube makes me want to take his shotgun class even more now.
I'm not a huge fan of pump shotguns. I don't hunt, so I don't have experience with them in the field, and I find the normal manual of arms confusing. Add in tactical stuff like "select a slug" drills and I feel like I'm in over my head very quickly.
I already had heard Awerbuck prefers to run "slugs only". That and his belief that you should load from the mag tube only makes me think his system might be simple enough for me.
The gods are cruel.
ReplyDeleteGerry
Rod Serling could not have come up with a better RF.
ReplyDeleteOy vey, I hear you. Feel better soon. *hugs*
ReplyDeleteWTF, I'll go.
ReplyDeleteWe ran amore buckshot in Louie's class than slug's IIRC, but I'll not forget some of the shooting positions we used when shooting slug's. To this day I can still go to prone and suprise my self with how well an 870 will group with slugs.
ReplyDeleteCouldn't you just fail to properly seat the shotgun once or twice(or even 4 times) and take care of your dental problems yourself?
ReplyDeleteSo which particular deity did you piss off Tam?
ReplyDeleteBGM
Yeah.........that blows.
ReplyDeleteAnon 5:45,
ReplyDeleteCan you hold this target? Just for a second?
Chuck a boomslang into his rickshaw.
ReplyDeleteAnon 5:45 makes me laugh.
ReplyDeleteAnon@5:45
ReplyDeleteI know several absolutely primo American women who would love to be alone with you in a locked room for about five minutes...
In every way you show a complete lack of understanding of the fairer AMERICAN sex...
I would tell you to do something very rude and physically impossible to yourself, but I do not wish to in any manner contaminate the blog of our fair hostess...
cap'n chumbucket
Boy......
ReplyDeleteTalk about a target audience FAIL!
This one had me laughing so hard I had tears running down my face.
Of all the places to try that particular bit of spam...
BGM
OH HOW CUTE! POOR WITTLE BABY IS UPSET BECAUSE MEN ARE BOYCOTTING HER!! BWAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAA!!!!
ReplyDeleteAnyway, you American women still have two options:
ReplyDelete1. Get used to living alone with your 10 cats.
or
2. become a lesbian
Those are your only two options, American WHORES!
I've got popcorn going folks if somebody wants to bring the soda/cola/pop (choose your regional preference) that'd be nice.
ReplyDeleteBGM
Anon wants to pay an exorbitant Indian dowry? If not, wait till the relatives come head-knocking. He may get what he pays for too, but sitting around getting fat easting chapatis and idlis is some peoples' life-dream. Sub-optimal childhood nutrition can result in major adult dental issues, and it's very evident among post menopausal Indian women, but a cheap bastard who just has a wife for a slave won't bother to pay that bill, so Anon must be a snaggle-tooth'd old Brahmin.
ReplyDeleteI too would cry real tears to miss an Awerbuck opportunity, but I may have to wait until October to shed them. Having seen two implant$$ and other a$$orted major dental procedure$ strike my wife, I'm on the side of getting things fixed even though real tears are shed - so good luck and god bless you.
Somebody apparently has a blister on his palm and is all butthurt about it. I'm just sayin'...
ReplyDelete(Although with a charming personality like that, it's not hard to figure out why.)
Is it possible to convince Indian men that suttee is good for them also? Dood, if I wanted a docile punching bag, I'd buy a punching bag.
ReplyDeleteItalian women get fatter faster than anything else on the planet, there is no way I'm going through life on a diet that's mostly vegetables and curry, and I strongly suspect most eastern European women would screw around far faster than their American counterparts. Given what they have for men, I couldn't blame them either.
As for their being unchaste, this is a problem why? Sauce for the goose buddy. Would you really want somebody who didn't know which end of the whistle to blow on?
I realize you're just trolling for 45 year old guys who still live in Mommy's cellar, drumming up business for some agency that caters to ladies afraid that their inlaws will set them on fire if their families don't up the dowrey.
But Jesus, or whatever cow-licker watches over Bangalore, could you find a site run by a less doctrinaire "decadent" American female? I doubt Tammy would need a gun to put you away, a spatula would probably suffice. If she could even connect through all the laughing fits.
Dear Anon @ 5:45,
ReplyDeleteIt's you.
XOXO,
Mister_V
It's kind of funny how this train of thought gets derailed so quickly...
ReplyDeleteAnyhooze, sorry to hear about the free ice cream melting all over the place and I hope your toofies feel better soon. I get to go in for my second (and final) round of clean and scrape this week and my gums are still sore from last week. Yay.
anon, it takes a special kind of * to piddle on somebody elses carpet. Congratulations Sunshine.
Ouch... in more than one way... Look at the positive, the world will owe you one for actually doing the right thing (for the student)...
ReplyDeleteThat's a level of suck that I can barely begin to fathom. I'm so sorry for you, friend.
ReplyDeleteWhat NFO said.
ReplyDeleteGood karma.
I notice it's all been said, and I won't add anymore, except: on the 18th, this last Thursday, I took a women's handgun class. I had not shot in 17 years, and did I ever have a lot of fun. Sorry you missed your class! :)
ReplyDeleteGee, and there I thought the Phantom Hindoo visited me specially. Turns out he's a slut...
ReplyDeleteTam, I'll bet your almost-a-dentist will be grateful (I say as I go in for a crown replacement in an hour).
ReplyDeleteGeez. Make a collection for me. Like most of us I have a job to fund my activities. I don't have fools to fund $$ so I can Play. Geez.
ReplyDeleteI have an urge to use my super 'leet skilz, to hunt down Nony and truss 'em up with a roll of duck tape. Leave 'em on Tam's doorstep as a gift.
ReplyDeleteAs she'd tell me to take out my own trash, I'll spring for a box of 12 gauge for her next range trip!
unless she would rather have cheap Russian .223?
I got that deal at cabelas just after they sent me a credit card!
Deciding to give equal time to the troll, I wandered his site.
ReplyDeleteThere are some pissed off guys out there!
I'm glad I never met any of those kind of women!