[I]f Steven Seagal asks you if you will stage a cock-fighting raid with a tank for the benefit of his reality show, if you have a badge, then you say no.There are certain jobs where thinking "Wow! This is fun!" should be considered a potential warning sign that You're Doing It Wrong.
I'll put "Embalmer" on that list of jobs*.
ReplyDelete*Note: That is not my job...
"There are certain jobs where thinking "Wow! This is Fun!" should be considered a Warning Sign that You're Doing It Wrong." :
ReplyDeleteDoes this apply to Presidential Candidates?
Why is every tracked vehicle a tank? Is that like every autoloading firearm is a machinegun?
ReplyDeleteI would go with the subset,anytime Steven Segal asks you to do something, run away quickly.
Gerry
What should concern us is the same question asked by a prosecutor.
ReplyDelete"Should we use the tank and bring out the SWAT team?"
"Yes, definitely."
I never heard this rule. I suppose, like Mudbone, that's why I'm in the position I'm in today.
ReplyDeleteOr, if you want a job where you say "WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOO FUCK YEAH!" - take a ride down to your local recruiter's office and tell him you want to be a paratrooper or tanker. He will be very helpful.
ReplyDeleteOnce you get it out of your system, then think about a career in law enforcement.
In eleven (11) years in law enforcement, after hundreds of arrests, I can tell you that I only felt a "Hot DAMN!" exhilaration rush about three times. Twice was while arresting burglars caught in the act. Once was after having successfully negotiated a 40 mile car chase and arrested the drunk driver, with rocks of crack in his mouth. (That was when I was younger. Nowadays, I'm scared as sheeit during all pursuits, and literally am recounting the whole thing in my head during the arrests, trying to think of how I could have done it better.)
ReplyDeleteConfession of sexual assault? No "yahoo." Tackled guy resisting arrest? No yahoo. I almost went "yahoo" over getting to spike a car that had tried to drive over a police officer and was going 130 to evade, but then I was concerned how it would end. It worked out all right, but still: no "yahoo."
NEVER let a television producer for a "reality" TeeVee show suggest to you how to do your job. First? He's a liar. It's not reality if he's making suggestions. Second, you'll lose your credibility and perhaps your job, if not your life, if you take direction from that guy.
Oh, and a tangental rule:
ReplyDelete"If it feels good to say it while you're on duty, then you probably shouldn't be saying it at all."
Learned that one the hard way, I did.
So do I need to go search your archive for that particular story Matt or will it be a post in the not too distant future?
ReplyDeleteBGM
"Or, if you want a job where you say "WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOO FUCK YEAH!" - take a ride down to your local recruiter's office and tell him you want to be a paratrooper or tanker. He will be very helpful.
ReplyDeleteOnce you get it out of your system, then think about a career in law enforcement."
Even then, the fun will be very controlled, planned, regulated, risk assesed and make sure you have your safety briefing before the weekend, kids!... Uhm... Oh yeah, and if you're at any level of responsibility, your fun comes at the very end of the list, if at all.
But don't tell the new kids that, they'll stop showing up!
Shhhh!
ReplyDeleteYep. You pay for every "Fuck Yeah" moment with hours of cleaning floors with a toothbrush and speed walking endless miles with a metric ton of crap tied to your body.
" (Take, for instance, the local ATF’s notorious big-guns-and-barbecue-in-the-desert gatherings. Holy shit, that sounds like fun, doesn’t it? Yeah. Never attend a desert barbecue-and-gun-extravaganza by a federal agency that vacillates between “WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOO FUCK YEAH” and “Hey guys, watch this!” as a motto.)"
ReplyDeleteBlink. blink. I guess this is my shocked face..