Friday, October 07, 2011

Oh, and about that GPS...

"Do you want to plot your route to avoid toll roads?" is a handy question, but when you're 'way out past where Jesus left his sandals, "Do you want to plot your route to avoid your car getting high-centered?" might be more relevant.

Not that it happened, but let's just say that the car in which I was passengering got its undercarriage scrubbed with grass courtesy of the Tom-Tom...

I am somewhat disappointed that at no time did we get pulled over, because I was all ready to answer "Do you have any weapons in the car?" with "What do you need, officer?"

12 comments:

  1. I just love it when that happens.

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  2. I've contemplated starting a blog titled Google Maps Hates You. I can't tell you how many times Maps has sent me off on wild goose chases. The best bad example is the Thai restaurant near my office' It's next to a correctly located Quiznos but Google Maps sends you all over the place and then tells you an open stretch of highway is the destination.

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  3. Google Maps has replaced Darwinism for modern man.

    If you are stupid enough to follow the map down that one lane road with the crossbar over it and drive over that cliff, then you should have children.

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  4. "Do you have any weapons in the car?" with "What do you need, officer?"

    I am SO going to have to remember that next time I get stopped. If for nothing other than the facial expression!

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  5. Actually, I understand that in some parts of Texas, when the Police stop you and ask if you have any weapons in the car, their next question is "And if not, why not?" ; )

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  6. ""Do you have any weapons in the car?" with "What do you need, officer?"

    I am SO going to have to remember that next time I get stopped"

    Hold on there tex.

    The NEXT time? It happens a lot to you? (I've been pulled over once in my life.)

    "Do you have any weapons in the car?" - is this a standard question? All I got was "do you know how fast you were going?"

    (Yes, I did. it was 2AM, the road was straight, clear, and the full moon fully illuminated it. I was sober and awake. I still fail to see the safety hazard.)

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  7. I lived in North Texas for 19 years. The door guard at a bar asked me if I had any weapons. When I said no, he gave me one. Sometimes I really miss Texas.

    Be safe out there.

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  8. "What do you need, officer?"

    Yeah, I've had that response ready, a time or two. :-)

    Google Maps has recently changed from the arrow pointing towards 12 O'clock/front of the vehicle to random directions, which makes it much less useful. When the arrow always pointed straight ahead, there was a point of reference for all direction changes...

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  9. The trouble with GPS software is that when you tell it to take you by the shortest route and you haven't told it to avoid unimproved roads it believes that you really mean it. :-)

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  10. Nah, it's better in Utah, where they can't ask you if there are any weapons in the car, but simply ask if you have any on your person. So, when you respond with, "which would you like" the look on their face is just priceless.

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  11. A new phenomenon this is not.

    Long and long ago, before modern GPS's existed, I planned a trip out west using the then-current version of Delorme Street Atlas. On a certain leg of said trip it tried to route me by way of something called "forest roads," this route being perhaps 30-40 miles shorter and therefore (it thought) faster than the nearest highway.

    Some research revealed that "forest road" is the western equivalent of "fire road," the sort of unimproved dirt road that only a Land Rover can travel with reasonable odds of emerging intact.

    I went via the highway.

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  12. I've got to post the pics of that road we took, Tam. Narrowing asphalt giving way to gravel giving way to graded dirt, finally giving way to ungraded dirt.

    --Matt G

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