Sunday, January 15, 2012

The inevitable end-state of government.

No, not "emperors" or "death camps", but something much, much worse.

Sooner or later, every government instituted by man will cross the bureaucratic event horizon and be reduced to placing recursive signs on vending machines that consist of naught but a positively Escher-esque message in bureaucratese which, translated into English, reads:
"This sign must be displayed on the machine. If this sign is not displayed on the machine, please call the number on the sign to report its absence. That is all."
I... just... I mean... wow. From here we just spiral down toward the inevitable singularity of the Department of Department Inspector Inspectors.

I get to feeling all anarchic just reading that.
.

23 comments:

  1. Sort of like a place I used to work, where they had an email address to notify the IT department if your email wasn't working.

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  2. Hi Tam,

    "All machines have their friction. But when the friction comes to have its machine, let us not have such a machine any longer."

    Thoreau


    Trying to talk people into letting go of their government is about like trying to talk a Christian out of his religion.

    Dave

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  3. http://www.coinwash.com/mb/showthread.php?t=9913

    That's the first hit I got when I did a search-fu on the number. It has a bit of background but you'll still scratch your head.

    -SM

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  4. 'Department of Redundancy Department' (Firesign Theatre)

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  5. It's not the 48% of the population that don't pay taxes that are the problem. Most of them don't vote.
    It's all the voters that are employed directly or indirectly by the government that lock us into the death spiral.
    Do you think any CPAs or tax preparers will ever support a flat tax?

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  6. I haven't laughed all day. This helped me smile. Thank you....even as I weep at the horror of it existing.

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  7. Dumb, I agree: but my brother owns a vending machine business, and I asked him the same question.

    The answer to this is: Before July 2010, the sticker also had the name, address, and FEIN of the owner/operator of the machine. Many identity thieves were using this information in unscrupulous ways, and so the vending machine operators of the state wanted permission to stop posting the stickers. They were unsuccessful in lobbying to have the stickers removed from the law, so they did the next best thing: they got the person information that was being stolen removed from the law. Now all that is left is what you see above.

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  8. There's an explanation of sorts, whether it leaves a satisftying taste in your mouth depends on something something something oh crap I've run out of pointless helpfulness...

    Anyway, something to do with replacing the previous sticker which enabled people to plainly see business and tax information.

    I guess I don't really worry about it, since I don't own any vending machines, because they won't let us have the cool Japanese kind that dispense whiskey and suchlike.

    Mike James

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  9. Divemedic is very good.

    Mike James

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  10. Actually, you can see the end state of government with the end of the Soviet Union. They started with more and got there quicker.

    When enough people decide to stop producing because it is no longer worth it, the standard of living collapses. When enough people stop obeying meaningless regulations, the government is powerless to do anything about it.

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  11. Read somewhere that, during the 1848 Revolutionary Summer in Europe, the Prime Minister of Austria Metternich was being escorted by Security Guards to a place of safety. When they were walking down through the building to a waiting carriage, they passed a wing full of Bureaucrats still at their desks. One of his Aides turned to him and said "Shouldn't we warn them to get out before the Rioters get here?" Metterenich turned to him and said "Them? Don't worry about them. They be fine where they are. In fact, they'll ALWAYS be there, long after you and I are dead and gone."

    Paraphrased, of course, but the Eternal Bureaucracy lives on. Best we can do is trim it back.

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  12. Like what happened in India 3-Thousand years ago with the Caste System - it's a born-to job-for-life, putting stickers on The Turtles all the way down. Upside is; you marry the sticker-wife, fight anyone who tries to stop The Stickering, have many sticker-children, and if you pay enough Sticker-Priests you can attaining Sticker Nirvana, where you become born again as the Hundred-Head Sticker Monkey God King...

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  13. This requirement is non-optional.

    Please perform mandatory informing when convenient.

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  14. Try the inevitable :

    "If you notice this notice, you will notice that this notice is not worth noticing".

    can't say you were't warned ...

    Phil B

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  15. It is forbidden to throw stones at this notice.

    (Supposedly posted on a wall/fence on a Scottish moor a long time ago).

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  16. Makes me want to rip tags off of mattresses.

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  17. Somewhere out in the Great Beyond, The Holy Saints Andy (Kaufman and Warhol) are laughing themselves apoplectic.

    Hail Eris! All Hail Discordia!

    Fnord,
    gvi

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  18. Hey, Underground? There is a difference. It is obvious to anyone of the meanest understanding that worship of government is obviously a false religion. People differ on whether or not Christianity is true, but at least you can't refute it with logic, as you can government-worship.

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  19. global, your comment just warms my cockles. I do believe Kaufman and Warhol were members of one of my ethnic groups. You know, the guys who hang out at Wrongplanet.net?

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  20. "The Department of Redundancy Department is currently closed while being audited for redundancy; the redundancy of the Department of Redundancy may be at risk of being declared redundant..."

    And people wonder why I love going to POETS corner on Friday evenings. :)

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  21. You sneer, but think of what these tags represent and the other option.

    The stickers tell us that wise, highly-trained, incorruptible government employees (top men, if you will. Top. Men.) are keeping close watch over the coin-operated food and beverage industry, ensuring that the mcahines are clean and in good repair, that our Twinkies and Nabs are fresh, and that we get a Coke when we press the button and not a Pepsi.

    But imagine the situation without those wise bureaucrats and their stickers. Why, people might sell Cokes and Nabs in unregulated machines! And... that might mean... oh, the horror!... that the State might not collect taxes??? Could our society survive???

    / sarc

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