Me: "Wow. Bobbi, check out that hipster douchebag over there. Some elderly lesbian wants her glasses back."
RX: "Rachel Maddow's been looking for hers all morning. The last place she saw them was at the Hipster Douchebag Appreciation Dinner."
Me: "They can't have those in Manhattan. They'd have to invite everybody."
RX: "That's what the island is."
Me: "A hipster douchebag penal colony?"
Later:
RX: "Oh, that's a cute little kid over there."
Me: "Yeah, but look at his mom's eyewear. The kid's a member of the Future Hipster Douchebags of America. When he gets older, they'll be enrolling him into the local Hipster Douchebag Scouts troop. He'll be getting merit badges in 'Dressing Ironically' and 'Buying Apple Products'."
The table talk devolved into what said merit badges would look like. The Apple and Starbucks logos were the obvious ones. Perhaps a goatee, the little Twitter bird, and a QR code, as well.
Rare form indeed this morning!
ReplyDeleteWV: "theshe" Official title of the Chairperson of the Hipster Douchebags of America, Inc.
Don't forget the Advanced Facebooking Badge, and the OWS Support Pin!
ReplyDeleteI may have tried to make a comment or two but it has been my experience that, when Tam and Bobbi get rolling, the best thing to do is shut up, listen and enjoy.
ReplyDelete"A hipster douchebag penal colony?"
ReplyDeleteAs someone who works in Manhattan, I assume they smiled when they said that,. . . right pardner?
To those of us who live in "flyover country", New York and Los Angeles are those places where we wouldn't go if you paid us.
ReplyDeleteHaving firmly established that the Algonquin Round Table has had its charter moved to Indianapolis, there remains just one question...
ReplyDeleteWhich one of you gets to be Dorothy Parker?
gvi
Yep, y'all are on a roll... :-)
ReplyDeleteI assume the QR code badge links to their "About ME" page?
ReplyDeleteYeah, I'll go there.
ReplyDeletehttp://hipsterhitler.com/
'Dressing Ironically', damn, yet another Tam quote to be.. er, quoted.
ReplyDeleteThe hipsters are all in Brooklyn now. Manhattan is so played out, doncha know.
ReplyDeleteAnd an Instagram photo badge.
ReplyDeleteThe first word legible in the first image on the right on that website is "granola."
ReplyDeleteJust sayin.
Didn't they axe the Starbucks badge when Starbucks refused to cave on open carry?
ReplyDeleteYou're eating at Cafe Patachou and you're surprised that a hipster works there?
ReplyDeleteI like when the unemployed ridicule people with jobs!
ReplyDeleteAs a former Boy Scout and actual Eagle Scout (Troop 388, South Florida Council) I must say that the very mental image of that kind of thing makes me throw up in mouth, a little.
ReplyDeleteGee, gals, y'all sure can mess with a guy's mind!
Anon 8:44 That's gainfully unemployed for Tam -- and as for me, chum, I punch a clock. Over 40 hours a week, every week. When'd you last break a sweat? (Video games don't count).
ReplyDeleteGals, is there some way y'all can apply the bolt-cutters to the typing fingers of the obvious spammeer who posted just before me, here?
ReplyDeleteTo be fair, one could award similar "merit" badges for "Dressing Tactically" and "Buying Magpul Products".
ReplyDeleteOTHER people sure have weird hobbies & tastes.
What an ironic post.
ReplyDeletehootie11bravo