Me: "I have now added ibuprofen and Band-Aids to the things I carry in my turse..."
RX: "That sounds like a good idea."
Me: "...along with the Kleenex and handi-wipes and toilet paper and a spork."
RX: "Uh, that last combination is a little gross, when you think about it."
Hey, in and out. Mother Nature's way; just don't get things confused.
ReplyDeleteSO WRONG.
ReplyDeleteSo this is what happens when you lose the directions for the three shells?
ReplyDeleteHow low we have sunk.
stay safe.
As long as you don't start describing your take-along snacks this thread should not devolve into anything more horrible than sporking euphemisms.
ReplyDeleteWell, here I've been thinking about how I need to flesh out the kit in the car, when what I really should do is a little Altoids-tin 1st aide kit. Fortunately, I have almost everything I need for that. I normally despise the little individual foil packs of this or that, but those would be just what I need.
ReplyDelete@Mikee: I suppose some twisted wretch would try to eat Slim Jims with a spork.
Prepared IS prepared! Just sayin...
ReplyDeleteThe spork has to be the most useless thing ever invented. They're better than nothing for glop but ever try to eat a salad with one? How about some soup?
ReplyDeleteGrinfilledCelt
Ah, ibuprofen and Band-Aids. Did you know that you're now suitably equipped to preform the functions of your average Corpsman?* :P
ReplyDelete* For the idiots (and our Fearless Leader, but I digress), it's not corps-man.
"Digress". You spelled "repeat myself" wrong.
ReplyDeleteUm, your spork, sir? Madam?
ReplyDeleteDarned thing actually has a deep enough bowl for soup but will still stab most foods. Personally, I'd add a set of takedown chopsticks, which'll let you power through most salads. If you know how....
Folding tactical chopsticks with Picatinny rails and a Kydex holster?
DeleteSporks have their dangers.
ReplyDeleteI normally wear an Ex-Officio fishing shirt with a deeeeep left pocket. In that pocket normelly reside two or three pairs of el-cheapo(Free) Cninese restaurant chomp stix. They do make eating a salad much easier, and yes, I know how to use them. As for soup, eat the solid(ish) bits with the Chomp Stix, then sip the broth from the bowl. Who cares what the snotty Matier-dee thinks? It's my soup.
ReplyDeleteI can get around a bowl of ramen in half the time someone wielding a spoon can.
Gerry N.
Why also toilet paper? I just have paper tissues. Works as well for wiping your nose as wiping the other end. But I do agree that you better have something.
ReplyDeleteAnd a couple of needles and a small spool of thread, and some spare buttons and a couple of safety pins fit nicely inside the small first aid pack I carry. Also small scissors and a small folding knife are in there.
Most times I also have something like a space blanket. With my knees I may want to sit down even when there is nothing like a suitable open coffee shop to be found, and it's nice to have something I can place between me and the possibly wet or snow covered park bench or big rock. And of course a flashlight. Which I have needed to use last about five or so years ago, I think. I do check the batteries on regular intervals, though.
Spork? Haven't thought of that. Hmm.
Errr.... What's a turse?
ReplyDeleteAnd Tam, wonderful Oleg Volk portrait!
Temnota,
ReplyDelete"Folding tactical chopsticks with Picatinny rails and a Kydex holster?"
No, just takedown titanium hiking chopsticks. I keep meaning to get some of those to carry along.
Charlie Foxtrot,
"Errr.... What's a turse?"
It's a Tactical pURSE. Kind of a joke name for one of those Maxpedition- or 5.11-type bags that are so common these days. Mine's a 5.11 PUSH Pack.
No tape? Railroad flares? 80 feet of rope? No gloves? No garrote? Where are the fishing hooks?
ReplyDeleteThat Altoids tin emergency kit works nicely. Had to replace a one-use bag of burn cream last week, and it was nice I had it.
ReplyDeleteThough with the other stuff, I don't think a MRE roll of toilet paper will fit.
A bit of searching failed to come up with any take-down chopsticks short enough for the Altoids tin. What I thought was amusing was the spendy Snow Peak brand "Carry-on" chopsticks. Whuh? The TSA thugs will let you carry those on a plane? Okay, so maybe I'm a bit over the top in my criticism of of the security clowns, but I'm also not surprised that something which makes a better weapon than a nail clipper (ball-point pen, knitting needle) is just okey-dokey.
ReplyDeleteThe Snow-peak brand appears identical to off-brand much cheaper stuff. I also found the "kung foon" model spork, which has slots in the handles for a pair of chopstick, thus extending the handle portion. Nifty, and perhaps more useful than the toolhead of the CKT spork (of which I have two -- so I don't really need yet another spork).
I'm old-school -- German army surplus nesting utensil set from CTD stored in a Baggie in the Maxpedition pack.
ReplyDeleteY'all ever read "Backwoodsman"? Some of those guys can go a week with their pocket knife, a cigarette lighter, and a .22 rifle. Not that they don't discuss extra odds and ends... needles/thread, band aids, waterproof matches, string and/or rope, flares, duct tape, space blanket, and whatever else. Their key idea is pack simple and travel light.
ReplyDeleteI used to travel light, now I travel comfortable. If Maxpedition ever sells a trailer to tow behind my Versapack, I am so buying one.
Deletemustanger,
ReplyDelete"Some of those guys can go a week with their pocket knife, a cigarette lighter, and a .22 rifle. Not that they don't discuss extra odds and ends... needles/thread, band aids, waterproof matches, string and/or rope, flares, duct tape, space blanket, and whatever else. Their key idea is pack simple and travel light. "
That's nice.
The stuff I'm talking about fits in a not-uncomfortably-heavy 1'x1'x6" pouch along with a Kindle Fire, a digital camera, cigarettes, flashlights, a smartphone, a SAK, some multitools, pens, markers, a 50' hank of 550 cord, and enough other random crap to re-start civilization.
If somebody thinks they're more manly because they're too girly to carry that, then that's awesome, but there is no virtue in suffering. ;)
Nobody said anything about "manly" vs "girly". It's all personal preferences in a given area along with the distance/duration of their excursion.
ReplyDeleteNobody said there was any virtue in suffering. If somebody thinks they're more girly because they're too manly... Oh, whatever.
mustanger,
ReplyDeleteI dunno, you're the one that brought it up. You tell me. ;)
I'm still trying to figure out what good a .22 rifle will do at an interstate rest stop with sub-par shit tickets. ;)
Tam, All possible joking aside...
ReplyDeleteIt looks to me like we're talking about two different AO's. I'm not thinking of running the interstates and you may not be thinking of a backcountry hunting/fishing trip.
I'm still trying to figure out what good a smart phone and a Kindle Fire, and all this other electronic stuff, will do when we all can't plug in the chargers. Oh, that's right... it won't do any good beyond what previously shared knowledge helps us survive to rebuild civilization.
mustanger,
ReplyDeleteI am talking about stuff I use in my day-to-day life. The one with grocery stores and mortgages and traffic lights. This is, after all, my purse I'm talking about, not my Emergency Nuclear Armageddon Survival Bugout Zombie Bag.
I realize that a lot of people on the internet expend a lot of time planning on how they're going to survive the complete and total collapse of civilization, which is always Just About To Happen (seriously, I remember reading Mel Tappan as a little kid,) but I feel fairly comfortable in saying that the blanket in the trunk of my car is more likely to be used if it gets stuck on the highway in a blizzard than in making an emergency shelter after EMP UN Invasion Zombie Apocalypse Doomsday. (But it's nice that I could use it there, too.)
PS: You charge your Kindle Fire or smartphone with a solar panel or a generator. If it finally fails, you can always go back to the paper books in the attic.
Tam, I see what you're saying about what's in your purse for day to day. I also know I've conversed with plenty of people who cannot grasp why anyone gets away from "civilization" for any length of time unless it's any sort of massive trouble. I think I see how this conversation turned to TEOTWAWKI, but that's not necessarily what I'm talking about. Case in point... I'm a deer hunter and I'm generally out there every open firearms season in my state. (Kinda nice to have some extra gear with you out like that... Stuff that comes in handy in camp.) Some people think hunting is crazy/unnecessary... Everybody knows they manufacture meat at the grocery store, and it's not from a dead animal, right? Consider quiet time to slow down, relax, think... It's suddenly not so crazy/unnecessary. Oh, and I grew up fishing, too... I grew up in and out of small boats. Some of that stuff you keep in your purse, and others have mentioned in this thread, can come in just as handy on a boat as in deer camp.
ReplyDeleteAnd between grocery runs and other errands, I've been known to whittle down the rats around the barn... A .22's pretty good for that. It's not TEOTWAWKI, but shooting is a lot less boring than dropping poison down the holes.
Yeah, I make grocery runs and other errands too... Gotta have the green beans and 'taters to go with the deer steaks and if you're not gardening some vegetables... Or the deer the beans... Some people seem to think gardening's crazy TEOTWAWKI, too. Plenty of us know that's not right...
I meant the deer maybe ate the beans... Lousy proof reading.
ReplyDeleteI'm betting the "Spork" is a TAD Gear folding titanium model!
ReplyDelete