Thursday, August 09, 2012

You might have a drinking problem if...

Country music star Randy Travis, who pleaded no contest to public intoxication following the Super Bowl in February, was arrested again Tuesday after being found naked, smelling apparently of alcohol and lying on a remote stretch of roadway in northern Texas just before midnight, authorities said.
I'd say that when you start finding yourself lying naked on remote country roads in the middle of the night, it's about time to have your agent call Betty Ford and book a room. I hear the Saul Hudson suite is nice.

31 comments:

  1. "and felony retaliation, after allegedly threatening to fatally shoot highway patrol troopers "

    This won't go well for him. Granted, at least he made this mistake in his home town. I would imagine things would not go quite as well for someone making threats like that to cops in Boston or Philly.

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  2. But just think of the hit songs that he could write about this!

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  3. "I'd say that when you start finding yourself lying naked on remote country roads in the middle of the night, it's about time to have your agent call Betty Ford and book a room."

    Or swear off NyQuil forever.

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  4. Are you sure that was not part of his application process for IMPD?

    Shootin' Buddy

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  5. "and felony retaliation, after allegedly threatening to fatally shoot highway patrol troopers "
    Uh, did he have a gun on him somewhere?
    IANAL, but I thought that for a threat to be criminal, it had to be imminent and possible. Or is that only for "civilians"?

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  6. He wouldn't sound any less guilty if the press had said he was allegedly naked and allegedly smelled like alcohol when he allegedly threatened the officers. Once you're naked in a convenience store you're done for in the court of public opinion.

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  7. If he crashed his truck in the rain while going to see his mom in prison he would have been fine.

    Gerry

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  8. Love the reference to Slash...

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  9. I've known people who were big Randy Travis fans, and hate to think that this situation probably fits into one of their fantasies...

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  10. I think this is the country music equivilent of what hiphop artists do crimewise to keep their "street cred".

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  11. Robert,

    ""I woke up naked on a county road were a po-lice-man knew my name...

    I said I'd shoot his ass if he didn't go away..."
    "

    The internets is yours for today. Please don't break it.

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  12. I wonder. If Michael Jackson made the news big time like this, I would be looking for a new album to be coming soon.

    Travis hasn't just released any new recordings, has he?

    Besides, if the dude was nekkid, it makes the shooting words less than threatening. "Forget something, there, Tex?"

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  13. Yeee Hah! Looky what I got! (ROARS OFF IN A CLOUD OF BYTES)

    Thanks Tam, I always wanted one a these!

    (I had a lot more lines, but no time to write 'em.)

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  14. Could have been worse.

    At least he wasn't running down the road naked and yelling that the gators were chasing him ( do not mix Jimsonweed and pot ... just dont ).

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  15. Lying on a remote stretch of roadway in northern Texas around midnight sounds all starry-night romantic etc. until you realize that "remote" in today's world means around a quarter-mile from the Kevin's Quick-Stop in Vega (or " North Texas is generally considered to include the area south of Oklahoma, east of Abilene, and north of Waco." so it could be) and one can use Street-View to find the exactitude of that location...

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  16. Mycroft said:
    "IANAL, but I thought that for a threat to be criminal, it had to be imminent and possible. Or is that only for 'civilians'?"

    Mycroft, Texas' law Obstruction Or Retaliation is for everyone who reports a crime, is a witness to a crime, or takes action on it.

    It probably gets filed more with police victims, because it pretty much is instantly reported when it's committed against them.

    This is good law. It gives us recourse when that child molester that you called in on threatens you and your family. It gives our cops, DA's, and judges some kind of expectation that they can do their jobs without being threatened for it. It means that if you sit on a jury, anyone threatening you commits a 2nd degree felony.

    As for the gun needing to be present? Nope. You make a threat in retaliation, and the threat stands. If you have to have imminence, consider that his car was right there, and we pretty much assume that there's a gun in it. Also, the officer is armed, bringing a gun to the scene.

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  17. The part I can't get over is the car: 1998 Pontiac Trans Am. . . apparently 20 million albums sold doesn't get you a Jaguar or a Maserati these days. .

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  18. Anon 1:15

    "The part I can't get over is the car: 1998 Pontiac Trans Am"

    I think the point is not the 14 years since the car was made, but that it was a decent car, much admired, and heavy enough to face Texas roads that would shred a millionaire type vehicle. For fun driving, I am not sure you really need better than this. Especially in country when you check for cross traffic at the intersection ahead by looking for trails of flying dust from the side directions.

    A Trans Am in decent condition, of any age, won't be sneered at in any rural area.

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  19. "The part I can't get over is the car: 1998 Pontiac Trans Am" Anon, that was his "drinkin' car".

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  20. That car the one with the chicken on the hood? Kewl!

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  21. M'self, I'm not willing to quit drinking just now. I did not start drinking heavily until quite late in my life, so I figure that the usual diseases of old age will get me before the alcohol does.

    Alcohol does seem to have fewer and lesser side effects than the doctor-drugs commonly prescribed for anxiety, and one can buy alcohol anonymously, over the counter at the Publix.

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  22. An almost 7ft tall suitless wookie

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  23. Wake up late and honey put on your clothes, take your credit card to the liquor store...works for me.

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  24. It's a trick, the mob got him drunk and stripped him before stranding him in the desert, hoping the exposure would kill him so they could cash in his insurance policy. That or he made the mistake of partying with frat-bros.

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  25. It's either that, or we'll be reading his obit in a year...

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  26. Ancient Woodsman8:53 PM, August 09, 2012

    "You might have a drinking problem if..."...you go to the comments section of Tam's blog to rag anonymously on Caleb's business model or writing skills.

    Oh, should that have gone elsewhere?

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  27. What part of country/western singer did you miss? THIS is just a normal Friday night. And EVERYday is Friday night for them.

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  28. Cargosquid:

    You are casting aspersions in the wrong direction. That would be more accurate if aimed at rock/metal musicians. Or hollywood actors, for a bigger target! A more general label would be: entertainers as a group.

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  29. Usually the country singers wail on about missing their dog, truck and girlfriend or wife. He can can know sing about missing his pants.

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  30. He should of never smoked weed will Willie Nelson.

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