Wednesday, February 12, 2014

Shrimp-kabobs, shrimp creole, shrimp gumbo...

Hey, Tam! Can you get some plain cranberry juice while you're at the store?

There's pineapple shrimp, lemon shrimp, coconut shrimp, pepper shrimp, shrimp soup, shrimp stew, shrimp salad, shrimp and potatoes, shrimp burger, shrimp sandwich. That- that's about it.

No, no I can't.

I can get you diet cranberry juice, light cranberry juice, cran-apple juice, cran-cherry juice, cran-raspberry juice, cran-grape juice, diet cranberry lime, diet cran-lemonade, cran-strawberry juice, white cran-peach juice, white cranberry juice, diet white cran-strawberry juice...

...but if you want regular plain ol' cranberry juice? Sorry, you're just sierra oscar lima on that one.


*Actually, they had the little four-packs and one remaining big-ass jug on the bottom shelf. This was the morning of  Superbowl Sunday, so Bobbi hypothesizes that the former contents of those holes in the shelf facing were at that moment being poured into punch bowls across Broad Ripple.
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12 comments:

  1. Life imitates Brian Regan.

    http://youtu.be/pAajpt9SyNM

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  2. Reminds me of Adam Carolla's rants about trying to get ice tea without passion fruit.

    Corey

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  3. Off topic, but did you hear about the sinkhole under the National Corvette Museum that swallowed up 6 cars from the museum indoor display?

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  4. Diet Cranberry is OK, and fulfills the same purpose as drinking regular cranberry. So does Cran-grape, for that matter, and if I have a bladder infection, Cran-grape was always my go-to choice, it being somewhat less repulsive to drink.

    Of course since I stopped swapping bodily fluids with my ex, the occurrence of bladder infections has dropped to zero.

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  5. You might still be able to find straight cranberry juice in the cocktails mixers section.

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  6. I have to vote with og; Cran-grape is the only one I can stomach.

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  7. Cran pomegranate is very good, but the new Cranberry Lemonade Ocean Spray makes is awesome. I wish it came in a handle jug.

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  8. I now have the same problem at the local tavern. A third of the bar-back is occupied by every flavor of vodka, for crying out loud, and I feel as silly as a goose when I have to specify "vodka flavored vodka" anymore when I order a mixed drink, in the off-case they try to slip me some fruity concoction. Don't get me wrong, we Croats love ourselves a good liqueur - it's what we do best with all the leftover fruit we have rotting behind the barn in the old country - and there's no fruit we won't ferment and distill, but don't pollute the vodka with grape, "citron," or [shudder] chocolate.

    I'm sure there must be a health food store in the Ripple that has plain old cranberry juice. Of course it'll cost more than from a supermarket, especially if it has the money word "organic" involved.

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  9. @bluesun: thanks for the link. Dang, but Calvin and Hobbes was a good comic. I hope Bill Watterson is enjoying his retirement.

    @Douglas2: WTF? Waah!

    don't pollute the vodka with grape, "citron," or [shudder] chocolate.
    I've seen chocolate "wine" in a few places lately. Eugh. That said, the local Russian restaurant makes their own infused vodkas, and I have to admit I really like the horseradish-infused vodka. Then again, it may be because I just like horseradish. Horseradish roast beast sammich*, horseradish hummus (an actual Trader Joe's product), horseradish ... you get the idea.

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  10. Nobody drinks "plain" cranberry juice because it is basically undrinkable.

    That's why it's always blended with something else and a fair amount of sweetener.

    Upon reflection, it may be possible to drink plain cranberry juice if it is diluted with plenty of vodka.

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  11. Horseshit, tailwind, I MUCH prefer 100% cranberry (and grapefruit) juice over the sugar water flavored to taste like juice.

    Tam: Trader Joe's. The clientele will make you feel like you're still in SoBro, so wear some leather or real fur for fun.

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