I dreamed I was at a gun show, and I was walking the aisles looking at stuff, carrying my McCann Puffin Magnum knife and a Ruger Super Blackhawk that I was trying to sell. Who knows where the Blackhawk came from, but anyway...
So I run into Kirk from Fun Turns To Tragedy!, who wanted to buy the knife. He had apparently gotten a job at a super-secret Area 51-type compound for the Military-Industrial Complex, so I needed to mail it to some permanent address for him.
Now I'm left wandering the aisles with just the Ruger .44. As I'm browsing over a table full of Colt Lightnings and top-break Smiths, up walks frickin' Charlie Rangel, right in the middle of my dream, and asks to buy the hogleg. I'm all like "Charlie Rangel? At a gun show?" And he's making noises about how he likes guns just fine himself, but they should be kept out of the hands of the wrong people and blah-blah whatever.
I figured this was my only chance to get these particular tax dollars back, so I let him take advantage of the ol' gun show loophole right there. But I spent a good long time checking his ID.
While I was dickering with him, somebody bought the Colt Lightning I'd been looking at.
With a dream like that, had you said you had dreamt of your grand Dutch uncle last night, I wouldn't have been shocked. By the way, what was on the menu at Roseholme cottage last night?
ReplyDeleteSell the Puffin? OMG! Silly person, auction it on your blog!
ReplyDeleteAl T.
You have the best dreams. Except for the Colt getting sold out from under you.
ReplyDeleteDon Juan (the yaqui medicine man) suggested that when one meets a monster in a dream you should wrestle it to submission and make it show you the secrets of dreamland
ReplyDeleteRangel at the gun-show tops my recent one about having to kill a crazed time-traveling government agent vampire with his own lightsaber. (Note: Not as fun as it sounds...) Not sure if I should blame that one on the giga-ton of meat at the Labor Day barbecue, or the Osso Bucco I fixed that evening.
ReplyDelete"But I spent a good long time checking his ID."
ReplyDeleteI bet you did. So in your dream, what was on the backside of Charlie's ID? "Good for one free waitress sandwich at La Brasserie (when accompanied by Chris Dodd)"?
Not sure about dreamland but pretty sure that in real life Charlie's ID is identical on both sides.
ReplyDeleteBeing a Congresscrittur he's two-faced as all bejeezis.
Well, it sounds like to me that Charlie was able to get a Ruger out of your hands, prevented you from getting a Colt Lightning, and all you had was Money that already had come out of your hard-earned wallet in the form of Taxes. Plus he was now Armed, ready to fight to defend his Job, while you had nothing to prevent him from keeping it.
ReplyDeleteT'was not a dream, t'was Night-mere, me Lady.
Was that knife Damascus steel???
ReplyDeleteIf so let me send you an address right away!!!
In my dream, you'd have capped him while he was blathering and been carried around the show floor on the shoulders of an admiring, grateful crowd.
ReplyDeleteBut I guess that's why dreams are weird.
That Puffin looks an awful lot like my 1992 D/D Bancroft Field & Bloodstream model, right down to the parkerized 01 steel and micarta scales. If it fits and functions anything like the Bancroft knife, I'd have a hard time letting it go up for sale.
ReplyDeleteWV = "Warks" Damn skippy, that knife just plain warks, no matter what you throw at it.
I would have worked out something with the nearest dealer to let me "steal" a firearm (hopefully the same kind) because I'm about to Sell it to Rangel.
ReplyDeleteAfter the deal, why, the cops are just one phone call away. 2 actually, the dealer to report it stolen, then the tip.
You want to get crooks, ya gotta think like them.
That's a really awesome knife
ReplyDeleteFortunately, it's legal to sell a gun to an unindicted felon.
ReplyDeleteUnfortunately, he's an unindicted felon from New York, so you are still going to DFCI Alderson.