Saturday, April 28, 2012

usa.gov: Childhood illusions crushed while you wait!

Unc is engaged in the process of home wine-making, strictly for domestic consumption and which will in no way ever enter the stream of interstate commerce, except in a vague Filburn-ish sense. His daughter notes that he could make money, were he to sell some of it. He tells her that the .gov has declared that to be illegal.

The money quote?
At seven, she then says So, you can’t just make stuff and sell it? I said to her that if you did, you’d be breaking the law. After a few seconds, she says that’s stupid.
Out of the mouths of babes and sucklings...

10 comments:

  1. Ya actually don't even have to wait! Pre-crushed dreams are always available at usa.gov!

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  2. I was looking forward to fulfilling a lifelong goal of mine, and ordered a pre-crushed dream from .gov, but unfortunately they'd already shipped that particular pre-crushed over to China, so my dream of a pre-crushed dream has been crushed. I'm....not sure how I'm supposed to feel about that, now.

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  3. I was reading somewhere that every US citizen was guilty of committing at least three Federal Felonies because there are so many laws. So you may have already won your pre-crushed dream from the US Gov. As a fall back, check with your state, county, municipal, or mother-in-law for one.

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  4. RabidAlien

    I hear tell that PLA factories over in China can ship you a boatload of Pre-Crushed Dream real cheap.

    Below wholesale .gov brand even...Landed. And they even got it in every shade of red, not just the pink domestic stuff.

    Try: www.cheapcommiedreams.cn

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  5. Whenever I hear about home winemaking, I always think of Steve Martin in 'The Jerk' complaining that his wine was always too old, and that he wanted some fresh wine, now.

    In my experience, though, homemade wine usually tastes like it was fermented in a toilet tank inside a prison.

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  6. The execrable quality of home made wine is why Tennessee is famous for white lightning instead of beaujolais nouveau .

    And I see a future as a moonshiner for that delightfully logical child.

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  7. "Sparkling Muscatel, one of the finest wines of Idaho."

    ...

    "Don't you want to smell the bottle cap?"

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  8. You want to really mess up the budding wellspring of logic that is that young mind, explain to her that while having the ambition to make or grow something and sell it is likely a crime that will be deterred with hefty fines and/or jail time, doing nothing will be rewarded with the EBT and SNAP debit cards .......

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  9. No, no Mikee, that child can't even make moonshine for herself and unc to drink, at home. Tis illegal to make whiskey unless you are licensed, etc. That's why the good, self-reliant, independent folks of the south have such a problem with the revenoowers. Larry

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  10. At a gun show in Calgary some years back, my then 9 y/o nephew said much the same thing when I tried to explain Canadian gun law to him. Made me quite proud.

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