Me: "Washington, George Washington, fifty feet tall made of radiation*..."* UNLESS YOU ARE A LONGSHOREMAN, VIDEO IS ABSOLUTELY AND COMPLETELY NSFW!
RX: "No."
Me: "Yes. It's true. One time, George Washington killed a giant gorilla by yanking a great white shark out of the ocean by its tail and beating the gorilla to death with it. Then he used the shark to cut down a cherry tree."
Wow, the things one can learn on the Internet. Amazing!
ReplyDeleteWow...
ReplyDeleteI always liked Manly Wade Wellman's short story that featured Washington:
ReplyDeleteBut a long hand like a tongs caught his wrist, and I heard the bones break like sticks, and Mr. Loden whinnied like a horse that's been hurt. That was the grip of the man who'd been America's strongest, who could jump twenty-four feet broad or throw a dollar across the Rappahannock or wrestle down his biggest soldier.
That makes me feel so much better about the State I live in...it almost makes up for Seattle.
ReplyDeleteIf he saw the cesspool known as Washington DC he would probably start calling out Congressman to duels and smacking Senators with a horsewhip.
ReplyDeleteHe'll save the children, but not the British children.
ReplyDeleteQuick, somebody go out and measure the magnetic field at Washington's tomb.
ReplyDeleteHe may be spinning fast enough to generate power sufficient to energize the entire north-east grid.
He once held an opponent's wifes hand....in a jar of acid.....at a party.
ReplyDeleteThat's nothing...one time Teddy Roosevelt one-handed an M60 at a charging Bigfoot while standing in the middle of a raging forest fire. But as cool as that is, it's *nothing* compared to the time Ronnie Reagan rode a flag-waving velociraptor while firing an MP-7 one-handed while dodging tracers.
ReplyDeleteThe awesome...it hurts!
Commander Zero,
ReplyDeleteI am troubled, because I cannot decide if that was a Sasquatch, or a Wookie...
And just what the Sam Hill is Ronnie doing shooting a German SMG while carrying a commie rocket launcher slung over his shoulder?
ReplyDeleteLOL, gotta admit that's a funny one!
ReplyDelete"And just what the Sam Hill is Ronnie doing shooting a German SMG while carrying a commie rocket launcher slung over his shoulder?"
ReplyDeleteWay I heard it he started in a jail cell under a castle with just a pistol, and traded up as he went. Dunno where the 'raptor came from.
Drang,
ReplyDelete"And just what the Sam Hill is Ronnie doing shooting a German SMG while carrying a commie rocket launcher slung over his shoulder?"
Kicking godless commie arse, apparently. :D
John Stephens,
ReplyDelete"Way I heard it he started in a jail cell under a castle with just a pistol, and traded up as he went."
...aaaand that's the internets for today, kids. Submissions are closed. :D