Note To Self: When you point out to the TSA agent that the brand label on the X-ray machine ("Rapiscan") would be more appropriate if it were on the great big Porn-O-Vision machine, they are not likely to find it as amusing as you do.
Hey, the guy gave me the raised eyebrow "What's so funny?" look when I busted out laughing, so I told him. (The TSA agent who checked the gun case remarked that he had a 22/45 just like mine that he used for shooting steel matches every month...) I didn't get the feel-around treatment, so I didn't get to stare fixedly at the wall, muttering "Two by two, hands of blue..." over and over again.
I find it amusing that they are selling ad space on the bottoms of the trays you dump your personal effects in. When the day comes that America has cattle cars and camps, the boxcars will have ads on the side and the prisoner's uniforms will have sponsorship logos. ("Real Americans wear Nike when they get reeducated!")
Anyhow, I wasn't intending to post today, what with it being a travel day, but I am overwhelmed by the response from y'all to yesterday's post. LabRat brought me a box of Kleenex, commenting on how bad the sagebrush was this year. Yeah, allergies... that's what it is.
So aim to misbehave
ReplyDeleteHave fun out there! Tell us all about it later.
ReplyDeleteThe walls at the FEMA camps will look like a minor league ballpark. The biggest differences will be that the away team will live in GP Mediums and the food won't be as good.
ReplyDeleteHmmm .... Blogerado again, I assume?
ReplyDeleteHave a good time!
ReplyDeleteIt occurs to me that the US's dark future is likely a mix between DeathRace 2000 and Brave New World. At least after the civ-rios and pop-reds from the collapse of the prole-cred supply settle out and things stabilize to the New /New/ Economic Patriotism.
Get Nutrient-Cubes at Blue Eagle locations today!
Have you ever actually done the "hands of blue" thing at a TSA checkpoint?
ReplyDeleteIf so what sort of reaction did you get?
Always remember, you're not alone.
ReplyDeleteIf I ever fly again, which I haven't done in 5 years now, I will definitely be wearing my kilt. If some guy wants to feel me up for a living, I'll make him actually have to feel me up.
ReplyDeleteI'll even act gay, and act like I enjoy it, on the off-hand chance it makes him so uncomfortable that he has to quit.
I hope & Pray that everything works out for you, Tam. Hang in there!
ReplyDeleteUlises from CA, near the City of Hope & Sta. Teresita Hospitals
I tend to fly a lot for work, mainly to LE trade shows. I found that wearing the "business tactical" look ( 5.11 pants and shirt) and having a brief case that looks like a bug out bag gets me though the grope line fast. It's not very "greyman" but I have only been groped once in the last 25 flights. I hate that we have to go through it each time we set foot in a airport and believe that it is all just security theater, but I have to fly to make a living, no other option for west coast shows or factory visits.
ReplyDeleteA hundred fifty-six comments just down there so far. I've never (that I remember) commented here-- just an imaginary friend. Know that we are ten, nay, a hundred people who didn't commment that feel the same way: Get well soon. Put it behind you and/or go at it straight on.
ReplyDeleteGee, never wrote to a cartoon character before. (Your DBD caricature is my current desktop.)
Glad to see that you are not letting that "whatever-it-is" on yer nose cramp your style, Tam.
ReplyDeleteI last flew in June and I didn't see the ads on the trays... Lovely.
ReplyDeleteDid any of those losers yell freeze or anything after you'd been through security theatre?
I like the kilt idea, and I had thought about Viagra before the airport.
ReplyDeleteThinking about being old, here. We old guys are not as brave as the young'uns, but along with old age comes no longer giving a shit.
ReplyDeleteThat is, smarting off to the TSA and daring them to do their worst. Not that I'll ever do that; I quit flying commercial long before 9-11, on account of the photo-ID nonsense.
I need to find a different hill to die on.
Tam,
ReplyDeleteLooking forward to catching up with you in CO.
Even if you are going to be laughing hysterically at my pathetic shooting.
(Count another 22/4 in the mix BTW...)
"Rapiscan" ?????????? Really?
ReplyDeleteI suppose if they make it sound worse than it is.....
Have fun in CO.....
I will be dipped in sprinkles.
ReplyDeleteRapiscan
Tam,
ReplyDeleteWelcome all you folks (NJT/Jay et al) to God's Country! You sure you can't stay? 'Least for a decade or so?
Let me reiterate my best wishes for your continued good health and happiness.
Wave when you drive by...
jimbob86,
ReplyDelete""Rapiscan" ?????????? Really?"
I'm sure that back before they started with the probulatin', it was pronounced with a short "a". ;)
Tim Ellwood,
ReplyDeleteI, too, have used the "I'm with you guys" camo routine. :)
Looking forward to seeing you tomorrow. Funny how those imaginary friends on the internet are actually pretty awesome. Wish I could figure out how they make my monitor fuzz out like that.
ReplyDeleteRelated Note: While using the Ohio Turnpike recently, I noticed that the Insurance Company that my Wife works for has Ads on the Bloody Toll Booths.
ReplyDeletePersonally, I'm surprised that those Public Schools that require Uniforms haven't jumped on the Nascar Bandwagon. Something about a Crayola Logo on a Kindergartener's Blazer just seems like the Next Step.
Anyway, have fun shooting!
The "box" style pornoscans are made by rapiscan. The ones with glass are somebody else.
ReplyDelete