Wednesday, November 14, 2012

Armageddon Man.

So, with the re-election of the president, internet gun forums exploded into... well, pretty much a repeat of late November, 2008.

There's going to be an executive order for confiscating all firearms tomorrow and Barry, Harry, and Dianne are all jocked-up and stacked outside your door even as we type this and then things get into all kinds of weird speculation and the black helicopters are flying and pretty soon people are just posting scripture references, like the guy whose post consisted of nothing but
Revelation 13:5
...to which I replied
John 11:35
I'm still pretty proud of that one...
.

30 comments:

Farm.Dad said...

As you should be LMAO

ExurbanKevin said...

Ezekiel 25:17

But only when Samuel L. Jackson says it.

Joseph said...

Barry, Harry, and Dianne are all jocked-up and stacked outside your door even as we type

You know that's chock full of trigger discipline fail right there. BTW, where's Joe B. at in this scenario? Driving the UAV?

Joanna said...

Ezekiel 25:15-17:

"15 “This is what the Sovereign Lord says: ‘Because the Philistines acted in vengeance and took revenge with malice in their hearts, and with ancient hostility sought to destroy Judah, 16 therefore this is what the Sovereign Lord says: I am about to stretch out my hand against the Philistines, and I will wipe out the Kerethites and destroy those remaining along the coast. 17 I will carry out great vengeance on them and punish them in my wrath. Then they will know that I am the Lord, when I take vengeance on them.’"

Conclusion: Quentin Tarantino is full of shit. (Seriously, it's one of -- if not the most -- commonly available books in the world. Do your research.)

Exurbankevin said...

Well, yeah, Joanna. I didn' go to Bible school for two years for nuthin'. :)

Quentin Taratino: Sucky at hermeneutics, pretty durn good at script-writing.

GmbH said...

I prefer Rev 19:
the defeat of the Devil, the preparation of the His Church, and then Jesus coming down with two-edged sword of His Word coming from His mouth to destroy all the nations. He calls the birds to feast on the flesh of the evil kings and also calls His Church to the Marriage Feast of the Lamb (that is eternal uniting of all Christians in heaven.)

Roy in Nipomo said...

Might I suggest: Hebrews 13:8

pax said...

Proverbs 26:11

pax said...

Incidentally, I can't wait to see what effect this post and the replies to it have on your ad selection.

Borepatch said...

Matthew 7:6

Cybrludite said...

I'm more fond of Armaments, chapter 2, verses 9 through 21.

Bruce H. said...

2 Kings 6:16

Exurbankevin said...

1 Samuel 8:10-18
Samuel told all the words of the Lord to the people who were asking him for a king. He said, “This is what the king who will reign over you will claim as his rights: He will take your sons and make them serve with his chariots and horses, and they will run in front of his chariots. Some he will assign to be commanders of thousands and commanders of fifties, and others to plow his ground and reap his harvest, and still others to make weapons of war and equipment for his chariots. He will take your daughters to be perfumers and cooks and bakers. He will take the best of your fields and vineyards and olive groves and give them to his attendants. He will take a tenth of your grain and of your vintage and give it to his officials and attendants. Your male and female servants and the best of your cattle and donkeys he will take for his own use. He will take a tenth of your flocks, and you yourselves will become his slaves. When that day comes, you will cry out for relief from the king you have chosen, but the Lord will not answer you in that day.”

Joel said...

I'm pretty sure you can go to hell for biblical snark, Tam. Better watch that.

Though when I actually cracked a bible and read John 11:35, I did laugh out loud so I'll probably be roasting on the next spit over.

Joanna said...

I'm pretty sure you can go to hell for biblical snark, Tam. Better watch that.

You're probably fine. I firmly believe the Lord God Almighty is not without a sense of humor. *cough*platypus*cough*

Anonymous said...

Insert Farting Preacher link here

Kristophr said...

If they wanted to be properly godly, they should only be driving old Plymouths or Honda Accords.

Jeremiah, chapter 32. Verse 37

and

Acts 2:1

( of course, Psalm 83:15 is good evidence that God wants his followers to drive either a Pontiac Tempest, or a Geo Storm )

Tam said...

Kristophr,

God is a Plymouth man, for when Adam and Eve were evicted from the garden, the Good Book tells us that "the Lord drove them out in His Fury."

rickn8or said...

Luke 11:21

"...Barry, Harry, and Dianne are all jocked-up and stacked outside your door..."

Oh, If Only. Add Jackboot Janet and Blinky Pelosi to the stack and I could do a whole lotta good there.

Now if you'll excuse me, I got a bunch of bible verses to look up...

Joe said...

Revelation 19:11

Angus McThag said...

What version?

Link Revelation 13:5

Anonymous said...

I always liked Judges 1:19

but then I served in the 3rd Armored Division...

Jennifer said...

Nah. The disciples were together in one Accord.
You should be proud of that one. I give it one internet giggle-snort

Fodder4Thought said...

Holy crap. The 'related videos' that come after this ends contain something amazing - Epic Rap Battles of History: Clint Eastwood vs Bruce Lee.

Scraped the URL, too:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eHCyaJS4Cbs&feature=player_embedded

Sorry for the potential threadjack.






Walpurgis said...

Suprised that no one mentions this.

luke+22:33-38

E.A.P. said...

My belief is Psalms 23:4,and quoth the Raven "Nevermore."

...the real Mr.O said...

~God is a Plymouth man, for when Adam and Eve were evicted from the garden, the Good Book tells us that "the Lord drove them out in His Fury."~ Tam

Heh...you know I've always maintained that you'd be a pretty well-rounded person if you just had a sense of humor.

Come see us soon...and get well soon.

...the real Mr.O

karrde said...

Proverbs 26:4-5

It seems to contradict itself, but it accurately describes the options available.

(Tam: I still feel like your original reference is better than any of the follow-ups, including my own.)

Rabbit said...

Yes, Luke 22:36 is a Household Commandment in my home.

Windy Wilson said...

This is a two part Bibical reference.
To those who voted for this and who are celebrating more than they would have enjoyed had the situation been reversed;
Matthew 27.5, and Luke 10;37.