And so it goes...

A train full of congresscritters derails and who gets killed? Some poor random taxpayer.
If I had any religion left to lose, this would do the trick. pic.twitter.com/g1xc3Ke3kE

— Tamara K. (@TamSlick) January 31, 2018

Zero Context QotD...

Zero Context QotD: "The Venn diagram of people who own "drone" trainer blades and people who own pistol bayonets looks like the business end of a coach gun."

— Tamara K. (@TamSlick) January 31, 2018

Another hundred...

Another hundred rounds of Lucky Gunner's .357SIG ammunition got sent downrange yesterday morning in the ongoing effort to make the Surefire XC1B say uncle.

Also seen in the picture is a review gun for an upcoming Shooting Illustrated piece.

Four back-to-back mag dumps of .357SIG leave the slide too hot to touch, for what it's worth. The XC1B continues to work, and the mounting screw hasn't loosened.

Yesterday's shooting brings the total round count on the light to 750 rounds. There's another three hundred rounds from Lucky Gunner yet to go, and if the light's still running after that I'll just have to bolt it to my Glock 29 or something. If .357SIG won't do the trick, maybe 10mm Auto can.

It still lights...

Monday morning was back to the grind with the Surefire XC1B-equipped Glock 32 and a hundred rounds of Lucky Gunner's Remington 125gr FMJ .357SIG ammunition in an attempt to see if this light will wilt in the face of all that muzzle blast.

I had wiped the grease (and powder residue) off the lens after the last session and I was too lazy to head down to the basement to get more, so as I headed out the back door, I dabbed a fingertip in the bowl of congealed bacon grease in the fridge and dabbed that on the lens instead. I figure that if Pam and Crisco both work, why not bacon fat?

With the fresh recoil spring in the gun, it ran fine. I function-checked the light at several points during the range session, and it continued to function normally.

With this session, it has put up with six hundred and fifty rounds of .357SIG with no hiccups.

Also, the mixed smell of burnt gun powder and bacon fat borders on intoxicating.
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Overheard in the Office...

RX: "Organic yogurt? I like it a lot better than that inorganic yogurt."

Me: "I hate mechanical yogurt. Also, Mechanical Yogurt is the name of my next band."

"Black is the New Pink"

Wherein the guys from InRangeTV host a panel of experts discussing the best way to pander to a very important market demographic...
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What did John Farnam tell us?

Big shootout in Indianapolis! Bar fight turns into shooting! Two dead, three wounded, and two of the wounded are critical. Also, the bar's security guard was among the wounded.

This is what the TV was blaring at me as I woke up this morning, and so I hit the intertubes to see the details.

Oh. I knew something was up when the newsreader referenced the nearest big intersection as 16th and Sherman, and the online story corroborated that as having the incident occurring in the 1300 block of Sherman Ave.

This isn't technically The Swamp, but it's Swamp-adjacent. "The Swamp" being the near-Eastside neighborhood traditionally largely populated by the unemployed descendants of the unemployed denizens of Appalachia who flocked to the factories of the North and Midwest during WWII and the postwar boom years.

The near-Northside, once known as "War Zone D", is pretty gentrified these days. There's a wine bar at 16th & New Jersey, where there used to be trash fires and bum fights thirty years ago. But venture too far east or west on 16th from the enclave between Meridian and College, and you're back in the hard 'hood again.

If you were to ask me "Hey, Tam, I'm in Indianapolis for a week and I'd like to get into a gunfight. Where should I go?" well, 42nd & Post would be at the top of my list, but the parking lot of a bar at 13th & Sherman at 0200 on a Sunday would be pretty close behind it.
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Leaving Las Vegas

So, along about Wednesday, I got to wondering how I'd miscalculated my packing so badly. I always pack enough socks and underthings for fresh ones every day, and enough shirts to have a clean one every day, plus an extra shirt in case I spill something on myself.

But by Wednesday it was pretty clear that I was going to be one day short on socks and underwear...until I checked my itinerary and noticed I was leaving at 12:05 AM on Saturday, not 12:05 PM.

Anyway, I didn't get any sleep last night other than a couple thirty minute catnaps on the plane, and I'm flat wore out. I'll write stuff for y'all tomorrow, when I'm coherent.
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Prose and cons...

So, I did a quick straight up report on Mossberg's 590M.

More thoughts later.
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That went well.

Another day at SHOT, another RECOIL story (or two).
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I don't want to grow up...

Let's see if I can hold off doing so for another year.
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More writings...

• You can't swing a Galco Miami Classic without hitting a 10mm Auto pistol at SHOT this year.


• If you're gonna snowflake, snowflake all the way. (And yes I would.)

Happy JMB Day!

Today is the day we celebrate the birthday of the guy who invented the basic operating systems of half the stuff out there on the SHOT Show floor.
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Another thing I wrote...

...can be found here.

Share and enjoy!
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Day One

I wrote a thing last night instead of partying. Actually, a few things, but that's the only one up so far.

Now to get my game face on. I don't want to mess this up.
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So, this is a thing that happened...

Waking up and finding a still-in-the-wrapper Pmag in the pocket of the jacket I was wearing the night before, with no recollection of how it got there, is the most #SHOTShow thing that has ever happened to me.

— Tamara K. (@TamSlick) January 23, 2018

Long day...

Ow, my legs.

I am told by my phone that I've covered over four miles today, not counting all the standing around.
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I wrote a thing.

It can be read at RECOIL's site.

I had fun writing it.
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Verklempt

I got a notification from my friends at Indy Arms Co. that a package had arrived for me. A reader had sent me a birthday gift, and would I like to come and pick it up or should they hold it 'til after SHOT?

I allowed as how I had some shopping to get done at the local Meijer store just across the street, and I'd swing by on the way and get it.

I found myself standing in the middle of the gun store with eyes full of tears...

Thank you very much!

I took a minute to get my $#!+ in a sock before heading over to Meijer's for groceries and sundries. While there I swung by the magazine rack to see if the new RECOIL was in. It was.

The first issue of RECOIL with my byline in it. I do wish Pat were here to see it, even though I know what his reaction would be...

Important tip...

I frequently get asked via email or FB Messenger or whatever to offer CCW concealment advice to a male reader's Significant Other.

I'm 5'12" tall, I work from home, and I dress like a hobo. I'm currently wearing jeans a size too big, a nylon web instructor-type belt, and an untucked and unbuttoned overshirt that I like not only for its gun burka properties but also because it has cavernous "document pockets" that will swallow small notebooks and an Olympus Pen E-PL1 and the other things I use in my day-to-day work.

Is this how your Significant Other dresses every day? If not, I probably don't have a lot of specific concealment advice for her, just a lot of vague stuff and hints I've gleaned from other friends.
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Relic of the Past

So, Indiana is the state where you can buy a bottle of Jack Daniels in the CVS with less hassle than a packet of Sudafed, since you need to take a card to the pharmacist who stores the Sudafed behind the counter with the opioids and weapons-grade plutonium but the whiskey is just out there with the soda pop and bottled water.

Indiana is also...still...the only state where you can't buy cold beer anyplace but a liquor store, for some vague and no doubt John Dillinger-related reason.

This leads to the weird sight of grocery stores that have coolers for white wines and champers, but the beer is just sitting out warm.

A bill was advanced to allow cold beer sales in convenience and grocery stores this legislative session, but it died in committee, thanks to stiff opposition from the liquor store owners lobby.

"Alcohol and gas do not mix. So let's go ahead and use Hoosier common sense and be different from the other 49 states," said Knightstown resident Sarah Ward, who is president of the Women's Christian Temperance Union of Indiana.

Wait, the WCTU is still a thing? Apparently it is here in Indiana.

At least it looks like we'll get Sunday sales this year. (When I moved here it was only for sale by the drink on Sundays, and recently they added an exception for on-premises sales by breweries, wineries, and distilleries.)

...aaand that's a wrap.

The various testing protocols for magazine reviews leave me with a lot of partial boxes of ammo, and so I grabbed a box of Winchester 124gr NATO FMJ, Federal HST 147gr +P, and TulAmmo 115gr FMJ left over from...I think the XD-E review? Anyway, each box had only 15 rounds left in it.

I needed 91 rounds to finish the test, so those three and a full box of TulAmmo would do the trick.

The COM shots are from seven yards, with the full box of TulAmmo. That was just hosing nearly as fast as I could go, reinforcing not pinning the trigger.

I brought the target in to five yards and fired the fifteen HSTs at the upper A zone, at about the pace you'd use for shooting at the 3x5 in a FAST. Still at fifteen, I fired the fifteen Winchester NATO at the yellow triangle.

Finally, I pulled the target in to four and put the remaining eleven rounds of TulAmmo into the red star because duh.

There were no malfunctions of any type to report.

So this wraps up the CZ-75B Omega 2k round test. The gun was field-stripped and lubed with Lucas Extreme Duty Gun Oil on November the 6th, and has since fired 2,000 rounds, most of it filthy, steel-cased TulAmmo, with no further cleaning or lubrication. The gun has not once failed to go through the complete cycle of operation. The front sight's tritium vial leaked all its radioactive glow-y stuff, but there have otherwise been no parts breakages.

Stay tuned for field-stripping photos and general thoughts on two months of life with the Cee Zed.
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Long session...

In order to hasten the wrapup of the CZ-75B Omega test yesterday, I brought two hundred rounds of ammo with me to Indy Arms Co.: A hundred of the Aguila 115gr FMJ and a hundred TulAmmo 115gr FMJ.

Still using the distal joint but concentrating on getting off the trigger as soon as it breaks so I can be prepping for the next shot. This stuff was all shot at what was nearing "wheels coming off" speed for me. I am okay with this relative to the previous session, considering I was going a lot faster, but got better results.

There were no malfunctions of any type to report.

This makes 1909 rounds since the weapon was last cleaned or lubed with no malfunctions of any type. 91 rounds to go.
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I'm not as big a loser as I planned to be.

According to the scale and my little weight loss app on my phone, I'm down 17.8 pounds since I started using the app in late September. While this is the equivalent of no longer having to carry Huck the cat with me everywhere I go, I still didn't quite hit my target.

Unless I lose six pounds between now and Sunday, which seems unlikely without using a Stryker saw, my SHOT Show weight goal will not be met.

No matter. Onward.
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What's In A Name?

So, KEH is having a one-day flash sale on Hasselblad and Leica stuff. Even though I have no business even thinking about stuff like this with SHOT Show expenses looming in the near distance, I click the link in the email. I figure there's no harm in a little window shopping.

My eye is caught by a little Leica 14-50mm F/2.8-3.5 D-Vario Elmarit Micro* Four Thirds lens. It's not really a Leica, of course. It's Panasonic glass that Leica had some design input on and then licensed the sacred name to grace the lens. It would be like if Wilson offered a few design ideas and styling cues to Ruger and then Ruger sold a "Wilson edition" SR1911 that contained no Wilson parts nor had ever actually been to Berryville.

Yet I couldn't help but picture that lens hanging off the front of my svelte rangefinder-looking Pen E-P5 as I bicycle around Broad Ripple or Mass Ave this spring.

This is silly. I already have a vastly superior Olympus 12-40mm F/2.8 M.Zuiko Pro lens. If price tag were the chosen yardstick, the Olympus Pro is twice the lens the "Leica" Panasonic is. It's faster and covers pretty much the same focal length range. I can think of literally no situation where I'd use the "Leica" in preference to the M.Zuiko.

But it did briefly catch my eye.

Such is the power of brand image.

*As a reader was kind enough to point out, this is a regular Four Thirds lens, not Micro Four Thirds, which means I would have needed to use my 4/3-to-MFT adapter to run it on my camera. Most of my point still stands, though. Also, I shouldn't surf sales fliers before coffee.
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Fudd

Presented w/o Context: "I'm so Fudd that the only gauge I own looks like a #Magpul catalog had sex with a #Surefire catalog and they had a baby and the baby threw up on my shotgun."

— Tamara K. (@TamSlick) January 17, 2018

Finger issues...

Back to Indy Arms Co. yesterday morning, slithering along icy streets to get some more shooting done with the CZ. I had with me a hundred rounds of Aguila 9mm 115gr FMJ, part of a princely Christmas gift from Bobbi's friend, the Data Viking.

The gun functioned fine, although I still don't dig the sights. I'm noticing that a problem I'm having is that when I'm using the distal joint (or "power crease" because we need jargon for everything) I have a hard time letting the trigger reset rapidly during recoil. My old bad habit of "trigger pinning" creeps back in when I try shooting at speed, with the awful results you see above.

Oh, well, it's something to work on.

There were no malfunctions of any kind to report.

This makes 1709 rounds since the weapon was last cleaned or lubed with no malfunctions of any type. 291 rounds to go.
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Those double digit temps we were supposed to get?

Well, they didn't happen. Instead of the promised 13°F, the mercury struggled up to 8° and then shrugged, gave it all up for a bad idea, and began retreating again.

We're not supposed to see the far side of freezing until Friday.
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Once more unto the breach...

Constitutional Carry is up again in the Indiana legislature, in the form of House Bill 1022.

Contact your local legislator, Hoosiers, and also make sure that Speaker Bosma's office know that we will not appreciate him burying this in committee or shuffling it off to a study again. You can't call yourself "Indiana's Conservative Leader" and continue to kill gun rights bills. Pick one.

And if you're not a member of the ISRPA, fix that. Help from the national organization is always nice, but this is first and foremost a state-level fight.
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Three below...

Yesterday afternoon I got a little light cardio by shoveling our walks and those of our neighbor to the north. I wasn't cold or worn out after that, so I shoveled our neighbor to the south, too, linking up to the cleared sidewalk two doors down.

It was -3°F when we woke up this morning, so nothing at all melted off last night. Not supposed to see double digits until afternoon, too. I'm going to try to make it to the range and the store today, I reckon.
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Light snowfall...

Dammit, I just shoveled those. #snow #southbroadripple

A post shared by Tamara Keel (@tamarakeel) on Jan 15, 2018 at 7:54am PST

The soft whirring sound of derp.

If you think a USB-rechargeable battery operated fan is a worthwhile addition to a holster whose claimed primary reason for existing is that it's "more comfortable" than a plain kydex rig, you need to go sit in the corner and feel bad about yourself while the rest of us point at you and laugh.

Like Joshua H. brought up on the Bookface, this might have potential for hilarity:

Guy: "What's the noise?"

Alien Gear wearer: "What noise?"

Guy: "That humming noise. It's coming from... your belt? What is that?"

AGw: *fitfully tries to conceal his poorly fitted holster* "I don't know what you're talking about man! Just leave me alone you weirdo!"

Maybe if strapping a huge swathe of something to your side makes you sweaty and uncomfortable and gets your buttsweat all over your gun, the solution shouldn't be electric fans and cooling ducts, but a holster that is much smaller and waterproof?

I mean, I just drove from Indianapolis to Shawnee, Oklahoma with a Dark Star Gear Orion holster carried IWB, and that was something like ten hours, only stopping to pump gas. No cooling fan required, either.
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Sneak Preview...

Having lost over sixty pounds on the way to my initial goal of seventy, project AIWB is well underway. I've got the P30L and I have a temporary holster all set up. I'll be ordering a real dedicated AIWB holster here shortly.

I also got my hands on a subcompact for carrying when concealment might be more important. It's going to be the subject of the next VFTP 2,000-round test before I start carrying it, though, so watch this space once I finish up with the CZ.
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Automotif CXLIII...

Got lunch at Books & Brews in Broad Ripple proper this afternoon, after hitting the Indy 1500 Fun Show. It's in the building where the Monon Food Company used to be. It's a shame MoFoCo had to go away (I loved their new menu) but this means that Broad Ripple has a used book store again, and one that serves beer, to boot.

After lunch, we walked next door to Rusted Moon Outfitters, where this beastie was spotted, parked up outside.

An old school 280GE Geländewagen.  To paraphrase an old C/D review, it's like a Land Rover for people who prefer Dobermans and black leather trench coats to Irish setters and Harris tweed.
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This is making me all OCD...

I need to find a one-hour class. I'm feeling itchy looking at that total...

I'm also feeling powerful nostalgia for 2015.
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Changing with the times...

I noticed that the latest CDNN advert was ate up with ARs and AR uppers featuring quad-rail forends. And they were throwing a free quad rail forend in as a deal sweetener for packages with Colt 6920s and other guns.

And I got to wondering...

Who is still buying quad rail forends in 2018? And what are they going to do with the unsold ones?
They'll probably be donated to Third World charities like old sports game t-shirts are.

— Tamara K. (@TamSlick) January 13, 2018

I'm picturing some emaciated child soldier in Sierra Leone or wherever with an "NFC Championship 2013" shirt and a spanking new Yankee Hill Machine quad rail on his blaster.
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Resumed testing...

Thursday morning saw me at Indy Arms Co. with the CZ-75B Omega and a hundred rounds of TulAmmo 115gr FMJ ammunition.

I'm starting to close in on the finish line here and I want to get the 2,000 rounds wrapped up so I can move on to my next project.

That being said, I really like the way this gun shoots. I'm tempted to drop some Dawson fiber optic sights on it and go holster shopping and dabble at gaming. The target above was hosing in great big long 6- and 7-round strings and a couple mag dumps, and the heavy gun was stupid easy to control.

There were no malfunctions of any kind to report.

This makes 1609 rounds since the weapon was last cleaned or lubed with no malfunctions of any type. 391 rounds to go.
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That was fun...

While Roomie was finishing getting ready for work this morning, I headed out to go start her car and thaw off the ice.

I was greeted by an RX300 in a quarter-inch thick cocoon of clear ice. The door wouldn't budge. The ground was too slippery to yank very hard, too. I'd grab the door handle and pull and wind up sliding toward the vehicle.

I crunched my boots through the frozen crust, set my feet and yanked again, but I became worried about tearing door seals. So, I headed back into the house and grabbed an old blow drier and spent the next five or ten minutes using it to thaw around the edges of the door.

Once inside, it was just a matter of letting it warm until the ice started thawing away from the heated glass over the vents and then knocking it off in big sheets.
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Filling in...

Back on January 2nd, I upped the round count on the CZ75B Omega and didn't note it here for some reason...

There were no malfunctions of any type to report.

This makes 1509 rounds since the weapon was last cleaned or lubed with no malfunctions of any type. 491 rounds to go. 
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Still more abuse...

I hit the range at Indy Arms Co. yesterday morning with the Glock 32 and another hundred rounds of Lucky Gunner's Remington .357SIG 125gr FMJ to subject the Surefire XC1B to more trial-by-muzzle blast.

I'll note that the switches are positioned such that, if you shoot with a thumbs-forward grip, the Glock 32 recoils enough that you're likely to inadvertently turn the light on while shooting. It's probably because of this that the light needed a new battery by the end of yesterday's range session. Fortunately AAA batteries are cheap and we keep plenty of them on hand at home.

Also, every hundred rounds, I'm tightening the battery cap. Blue Loctite should correct this if it becomes annoying.

I had applied a little grease to the lens at the start of the test, and yesterday I wiped it with a Q-tip and the lens is clean and clear as new.

This gets the testing up to 550 rounds, and the light is still functioning.

Tinkering for tinkering's sake...

Once upon a time, computers weren't all constantly connected to the intertubes. What we call "air-gapped" these days was the normal state of machines back in the desktop beige box days.

Back then, when you bought a program it came in a cardboard box on physical media. You would install it on your computer and it would work the same way from the day you installed it to the day you stopped using it. Nobody could rearrange the menus on WordPerfect or change the buttons in Secret Weapons of the Lufwaffe... Good times.

Nowadays, half the software you interact with doesn't even reside on your PC. Further, there are whole departments at, say, Facebook or Blizzard or Google whose entire job is to "enhance the user experience". If they're not constantly dicking around, adding and removing features, changing what buttons do, moving things around...then they're not doing their jobs.

We have incentivized instability.
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Home Again, Home Again, Jiggity-Jig!

Good evening, readers!

A leisurely five-ish hour drive after taking my time checking out of the hotel in Rolla, Missouri is a lot less stress than hammering through straight from Shawnee to Indy in one ten-plus hour slog. Plus I get more Holiday Inn points, so I should get at least one night free during my stay in Little Rock for Tac-Con this year.

This trip was also a shakedown cruise for some gear I'm planning to use going forward. More on that later. For now, I just want to take these boots off. They're comfy...for boots, but I'm ready for house slippers after this past weekend.
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No Fate But What We Make

So, with Sunday being the final day of the class, I knew we'd be shooting the scored qualifier. For a change of pace, I field-stripped my carry Gen4 Glock 19 in the hotel room Saturday night and used a patch and some FP-10 from my range bag to wipe off the worst of the cack inside the gun. I didn't want to be clearing a malf on the clock*, and cleaning and lubing the gun couldn't hurt.

Setting out from the hotel to BDC Gun Room, I figured that I could just go ahead and leave the range bag in the hotel room that morning.

You know what else was in the range bag, other than cleaning supplies? My gloves.

Simunition rounds on the bare hands hurt.
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Long haul truckin'...

Indianapolis to Shawnee, Oklahoma is a pretty long-ish haul. It was something on the order of 740 miles on the odometer by the time I got down here. I drove in my usual style, stopping only long enough to put gas in the car.

Of course I stopped to get gas in Terre Haute, despite being only a couple gallons down at that point. See, since I have a dangerous firearm strapped to my hip, I'm only olly-olly-oxen-free driving across The Land of Lincoln so long as I don't exit the vehicle.

I gassed up again just on the far side of Saint Louis and again in southwest Missouri, grabbing a packet of soy & wasabi almonds and a Monster Zero at the latter gas stop for at least a little stomach ballast.

Having left Indy just before sunrise, I rolled into the hotel parking lot right before sundown. It was -6°F on the Z3's thermometer as I crossed the Wabash at dawn, and 34°F in Shawnee when I got here. Tonight it's still above 40°F here just before midnight, but tomorrow morning I'm headed back to a predicted high in the mid 30s and "wintry mix".
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I'm happy. For now.

The Casino Drill, it's called.

You stand on the five yard line with a holstered, concealed pistol and two concealed reloads. The pistol and both spare mags all each loaded with seven rounds for a total of twenty-one rounds on your person.

At the go signal, you draw from concealment and shoot one round into the triangle with the number "1" on it, then two rounds into the red circle bearing the number "2", then three rounds into the number "3" triangle, four rounds into the square labeled "4"...et cetera, reloading every time you hit slidelock.

The idea being that you are drawing from concealment, firing twenty-one shots with two mandatory reloads, keeping track of where you are on the target, and finishing this all under a twenty-one second par time. Each missed round, or round engaged on the wrong target, adds a second to your finishing time.

I've scooted under the par time barely on previous runs, but only when shooting by myself in a pistol bay, and not shooting from concealment, at that. I've blown into the nineteens in classes...but only in raw time. It always involved a couple dropped shots that pushed it over the 21 second mark.

But today in the EDP class at BDC Gun Room in Shawnee, Oklahoma, with the introvert's nightmare of being the only one shooting while Tom Givens stood there with a timer and the rest of the class stood around judging watching, I managed a 20.26 clean. That's a personal best, and I'm stoked.

Now to get better than that.
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Ugh.

I feel an essay comin' on...
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Hope and Change!

Drug warriors gonna drug war. #PumpMoreSwampIn

— Tamara K. (@TamSlick) January 5, 2018

I have to say that...

...the highlight of this latest Trump-Bannon scuffle is the fact that there are people running around in the comments section at Breitbart saying "Guys! Guys! Stop fighting! They're still secretly BFF's and this is just some 6D chess move to something something deep state drain the swamp!"

I am going to have to break into the strategic popcorn reserves before this plays itself out.
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Cold again, but...

...at least we're a whole degree on the right side of zero now, so yay?
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L versus X

So, in the circles in which I run, a fairly common Glock modification is to take a 17 and chop the grip to take 19 magazines. It's even got an informal nickname: the Glock 19L, playing off of Glock's own name for their longslide 17L.

The reasoning behind this is that, when you're carrying inside-the-waistband, barrel length is largely irrelevant to concealment, while grip length is very relevant. So theoretically the "19L" has all the velocity and sight radius and other benefits of the full-size gun, with the shorter more concealable grip of the 19. This copies the old "Concealed Carry Officer's" pistols from Gunsite, which married a Commander-length slide to an Officer's model frame for the same reasons.

Now Glock is selling what is basically a commercialized version of their MHS entry as the "Glock 19X", with the 19's compact slide atop the 17's full-length grip. For the MHS entry, this was because the contract specified both a 17-round magazine capacity as well as a maximum overall length.

A lot of the shooters I know are having a field day with this, with parodies like this one popping up all over social media:

The general shooting public vastly outnumbers the tiny demographic slice who even know what a "19L" is.

The general shooting public likes 1911 Commanders, 2.5" K-frame snubs, and putting Pearce grip adaptors on the G22 mag in their OWB-carried Glock 27. They buy truck holsters and Remoras.

Given how many people carry their SR40 and XD40 subcompacts with the (included) full-size magazine and (included) adaptor sleeve, Glock shows it knows more about the general shooting public than any of us 19L-loving snobs. They'll buy this.
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Warning...

I would like to take this moment to remind my fellow Hoosier motorists that 0°F is not an arbitrary number, like comedians have told you all your life, but is actually the freezing point of brine.

Drive accordingly.
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Reminder...

Every time I see someone addressing their "haters", I feel compelled to hand out this handy Primate Body Language Protip for the Internet: When someone is pointing at you and laughing in great big helpless girly shrieks, the emotion that is being expressed is not "hate".

And if you think this song is about you? Well, then it is.
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Oh, about that Kel-Tec ad...

The line was "For those who'd drink their own urine", while the hardcore survivalist dude in the photo had a beard and eyelashes covered in ice, so presumably he is surrounded by snow.

Anybody who'd drink their own pee for "survival" reasons when they're hip-deep in, you know, frozen water is either dumber than a stump and maybe doesn't need to be buying guns or they...well, we won't do any kink-shaming here today. Whatever floats your boat, Dollar General Bear Grylls.

(nb: Should you find yourself in this position, remember to thaw the snow and drink the water. Don't just eat the snow. That's bad.)

Argle Bargle

You're typing away, thinking you're communicating, and then suddenly you find out you aren't.

It's a funny ol' world.
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