IRNA said the monkey was sent into space on a Kavoshgar rocket. The rocket reached a height of more than 120 km (75 miles) and "returned its shipment intact", IRNA reported.Iran insists that the monkey launch was a demonstration that proved its space program was focused on purely peaceful goals, and has nothing to do with western accusations that it is trying to develop an intercontinental nuclear arsenal.
Iranian space scientists say their next test will demonstrate the ability to launch several monkey reentry vehicles in a single payload, each of which will be independently and peacefully steered to a separate landing point.
No word on whether the monkeys are of the face-eating, feces-flinging variety, which could be a violation of several international treaties on biological warfare, as well as Leviticus 11:27.
26 comments:
Filthy Monkeys.
*shudders*
Jeez Tam,
Where to start? If this is how you recover from "emptyhead" I can certainly deal with the pauses.
I hope the mullahs in Qom and Tehran felt force of the snark from an independent woman with bare arms, bearing arms.
Well, screen's cleaned now (least enough to THANK YOU) but I'm still laughing...
ALL monkeys are a poo flinging, face eating menace. I applaud the Iranians dedication to eradicating them, one at a time, by extravagant, rocket filled means. Since Davy Jones is gone, they only have 3 more to go!
s
Wil imadinnerjacket the mad monkey fit in the capsule?
Great. Monkeys in space. Like we didn't have enough problems.
Imunutjob's from another planet? I KNEW IT!!!
Maybe he's getting ready to go home. One can hope, but I didn't think ACME's rockets had enough range.
Maybe he'll get lost in space.
The nation who controls MIRV'ed space monkees controls the world.
LBJ 1959 (It might have been Richard Nixon)
Gerry
Why, yes, Dorothy, those ARE flying monkeys....and your little dog, too!
(I'm just glad the Otterbox makes it easy to clean the Droid.....)
MIRV -- I see what you did there.
Maybe he'll get lost in space.
Exiled to a universe envisioned by Irwin Allen? Gads! Almost nobody deserves that fate! Almost.
We send monkeys into space. Seven miles! Next year, we use rocket!
ULULULULULULULULU!!!
-Aldhahamdi Mosqueto, Royal Aeronautical Society of Pakistan.
Anybody ever noticed that 75nm is pretty close to the optimum altitude for a successful (and devastating) EMP attack on the Continental US? Now if only the Persians could finish their nuclear (peaceful of course) bomb program. Too bad their 'puters keep breaking down. Must be something they ate. (Wanna bet whether it was kosher or barbecue?)
If only the Persians had some friends to help, like maybe modern day Mongols? Better buy matches (needed for building fires so that FEMA. (Oops, I meant Homeland Security) can find us and issue us citations for unlawful burning (err, I mean rescue us)
I'm just saying.
Not 75. 250 - do the math.
Yeah, strictly speaking the Caliphists are avenging themselves on the wrong infidels.
On the other hand, they remember the stomping they got the last time they trifled with Eastasians, and hence remember which side their bread is buttered on.
As an aside, Leviticus is pure comedy gold.
gvi
Yeah, just remember, Spam is intact until you open the can.
Make 'em Marburg monkeys and you've got bioweapons, Multiple Independent Reentry Viruses.
global village idiot said...
"As an aside, Leviticus is pure comedy gold."
Yeah one of my favorite texans can't seem to say it without mispronouncing it as Levidiot.
I pay my local Grease Monkey good money to keep the ol' Geezermobile up and running.
Only three good kinds of monkeys. Grease, Trunk, and Dead.
Jim
Sunk New Dawn
Galveston, TX
as well as Leviticus 11:27.
Not really. For one thing, the animals referred to there are cats, dogs, bears, etc. (That's what you get for not having a Rashi in the house.) For another thing, the animal needs to be dead. And if IRNA says the monkey is alive, then it must be alive, because we all know the IRNA always tells the truth. (Short pause to pry tongue from back of cheek.)
And unless you plan to talk a walk on the Temple Mount in Jerusalem, and are Jewish, or eat the priest's portion of sacrifices that have been impossible to offer for the last 1943 years, it's irrelevant. And if you do want to take a walk on the Temple Mount and are Jewish, the possibility that the Iranians may subject you to ritual contamination is probably not the outcome you're worried regarding Iranians and suborbital rockets.
So the Iranians are up to monkey business. What else is new? :)
Peaceful? When monkeys fly.
Oh, wait...
I was hoping the monkey they launched was of the species formerly known as Mohmoudascus Ahmadinejadus, but now known as Craterus Impactus... No dice.
Great, now on top of everything else we have to worry about Shia Twelver Monkeys.
Who would have thought a Bruce Willis film could be a cautionary tale?
> Iranian space scientists say their next test will demonstrate the ability to launch several monkey reentry vehicles in a single payload, each of which will be independently and peacefully steered to a separate landing point.
LOL.
Genius.
"Intact" can mean many things, including inert...
I've been trying to work in a Kerbal Space Program joke for two solid days, but I got nuthin'.
Monkey incinerated? Well done!
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