...and yes, if you click on the above graphic, you go to the Toyota Matrix site. They've given me the creeping willies so well that the least I can do is spot 'em a link.
Monday, March 31, 2008
Ad bogosity.
Some of you may be aware of Toyota's strange new marketing campaign for the Matrix, having discovered it by clicking on fake banner ads for a Pub-Fighting School or Animal Lingerie. The best "ad" in the campaign is the one below, however. The image of Mr. Raccoon is, for some reason, just seared... seared into my subconscious:
...and yes, if you click on the above graphic, you go to the Toyota Matrix site. They've given me the creeping willies so well that the least I can do is spot 'em a link.
...and yes, if you click on the above graphic, you go to the Toyota Matrix site. They've given me the creeping willies so well that the least I can do is spot 'em a link.
Today In Geek History: Supercomputer.
On this date in 1951, the first US-made commercial computer, a UNIVAC I, was sold to the U.S. Census Bureau. They had it up and running in time for a June 14th dedication ceremony, so I'm guessing the peripherals weren't plug-and-play.
The behemoth took more vacuum tubes than an internet's worth of audio geeks, occupied over 40 square yards of floorspace, and was dumber than your cell phone by several orders of magnitude.
The behemoth took more vacuum tubes than an internet's worth of audio geeks, occupied over 40 square yards of floorspace, and was dumber than your cell phone by several orders of magnitude.
Y'know what's going to grind me to a halt?
In a few months, when all the log-rolling, influence-peddling, chip-calling, glad-handing, and back-stabbing is over, and Hillary "Ms. Inevitable" Clinton still doesn't have the Democratic nomination, I'm going to have to put up with four years of the worst whining in certain circles since Ferraro followed Mondale into oblivion. The whole thing will be stone cold proof to them that the patriarchy still has the game rigged, or that American women who didn't vote for her are just too blinded by the media machine of our male overlords to select one of our own for the top job. Not for a moment will it be considered by those folks that it's because the first really serious woman contender for the Oval Office is the most divisive figure in American politics since Richard Nixon.
Sunday, March 30, 2008
You wanna see something really scary?
The U.S. Constitution set up a federal government with very limited powers. Among the most limited were police powers, which were almost exclusively left to the states. Nine out of ten federal law enforcement agencies exist via the most loopholeish of invisible penumbras (a polite way of stating that they're pretty much completely unconstitutional in anything approaching a strict reading.) Even the FBI is the Federal Bureau of Investigation and not the Federal Bureau of Enforcement because, as originally envisioned, it did the legwork and relied on locals to effect the busts.
A view of how far we've strayed from this was illustrated in an otherwise innocuous line from Breda's St. Paddy's Day post which has been itching at me ever since, such that I finally had to write about it.
Regardless of your view of open container laws, if this was anybody's business, it was that of the City of Cleveland or the State of Ohio, not the United States Department of Homeland Security. And the scary part is that we don't even bat an eye at it anymore.
A view of how far we've strayed from this was illustrated in an otherwise innocuous line from Breda's St. Paddy's Day post which has been itching at me ever since, such that I finally had to write about it.
Determined to find a sunny spot, we headed to the parade route. But before we turned the corner onto Superior Avenue, I noticed quite a few police cars - federal police cars. They read "Department of Homeland Security" on the side. Officers in what appeared to be riot gear were patrolling nearby.Ponder that for a moment: The might and majesty of the Federal Government of the United States of America being used to bust a guy for violating an open container law. The Tenth Amendment might as well not exist these days.
"Uh-oh...is something happening?" I wondered. I realized then that we were outside of the U.S. Court House, right next to my first cousin. In a crowd of thousands, I found myself standing next to family. I was the flowergirl at his wedding and now he's as white haired as my father used to be...we laughed, both surprised at seeing the other. We both said "eejit" as we watched a man get ticketed by the Feds for drinking Guinness on the street.
Regardless of your view of open container laws, if this was anybody's business, it was that of the City of Cleveland or the State of Ohio, not the United States Department of Homeland Security. And the scary part is that we don't even bat an eye at it anymore.
Today In History: Royals 'R' Us.
Having fired their previous one, Otto, the Greeks went king shopping and on this day in 1863 they hired 17 year-old Prince Vilhelm of Denmark to be their king.
This must just be one of those European royalty things that doesn't make sense to someone unless they read a lot more British tabloids than I do. I mean, here's Vilhelm, a younger brother of the crown prince anyway, minding his own business and trying to get his feet wet in the Danish Navy, no doubt worried about looking like a complete twink aboard the new-fangled steam frigates, when:
"Vilhelm, sir."
"Huh? I mean, 'Yes?'"
"How would you like to be king?"
"Uh, isn't that kind of treasonous? What with my dad and older brother still being alive and all?"
"Not of Denmark; King of Greece, sir. They sent the job offer only just this morning."
"Greece? But I've never been there. I don't even speak Greek!"
"I'll hunt up a dictionary while you see to your things, sir."
This must just be one of those European royalty things that doesn't make sense to someone unless they read a lot more British tabloids than I do. I mean, here's Vilhelm, a younger brother of the crown prince anyway, minding his own business and trying to get his feet wet in the Danish Navy, no doubt worried about looking like a complete twink aboard the new-fangled steam frigates, when:
"Vilhelm, sir."
"Huh? I mean, 'Yes?'"
"How would you like to be king?"
"Uh, isn't that kind of treasonous? What with my dad and older brother still being alive and all?"
"Not of Denmark; King of Greece, sir. They sent the job offer only just this morning."
"Greece? But I've never been there. I don't even speak Greek!"
"I'll hunt up a dictionary while you see to your things, sir."
Saturday, March 29, 2008
This little light of mine, I'm gonna let it shine!
Heh.
The Democrat next door forgot to turn the light on her garage off, although the rest of her house is darker than three feet up a well-digger's butt at midnight. Save the TV, of course.
We, on the other hand, are lit up like the alarm board at Chernobyl.
The Democrat next door forgot to turn the light on her garage off, although the rest of her house is darker than three feet up a well-digger's butt at midnight. Save the TV, of course.
We, on the other hand, are lit up like the alarm board at Chernobyl.
Today In History: Surprise!
On this date in 1941, under the cover of darkness, a British battleship squadron closed to within 3,500 meters of an Italian fleet that had already been battered by air attacks during the day. Unlike their British opponents, the Italian warships were not equipped with radar, so it was a complete surprise when searchlight beams stabbed through the night and a veritable storm of 2,000-lb 15" shells blew the rigatoni out of Mussolini's fleet at what was, for battleships, point blank range.
BONUS!: Neat-o animation of the gunhouse and barbette (turret thingie to us non-navy types) on a British battleship.
BONUS!: Neat-o animation of the gunhouse and barbette (turret thingie to us non-navy types) on a British battleship.
Prepare to geek out.
LiberalCCW (after admittedly fair warning) provided linkage to this bunch of RC geeks with way more time and money than sense of perspective. It turns out that if you take bundles of hundred-dollar bills, shred them finely, and apply great pressure over time, the result is amazingly detailed 1/4 scale tanks. With movies.
I haven't seen such neato grownup toys since I stumbled across R/C model warship combat on the 'net.
I haven't seen such neato grownup toys since I stumbled across R/C model warship combat on the 'net.
Friday, March 28, 2008
Oh. My. God.
I suppose I have my friends at Atomic Nerds to thank for this latest blood pressure spike. If it wasn't for them I would have remained blissfully unaware of the kerfuffle at Lubbock airport that seems destined to go down in history as "Nipplegate".
More importantly, I wouldn't have known about the comments over at Hot Air. See, in the post over there it only took seven comments for some gonadless denizens of Vichy America to turn up and defend the low budget rent-a-cops of the TSA. Seven comments before some toadying sycophants lauded the TSA for defending the American skies from exploding boobies.
Folks, if the jihadis have you quivering under the dust ruffle in fear of nipple-ring-activated breast bombs, then it's time to grab a rusty bayonet and Daniel Pearl yourself live on Al Jazeera because they have won. If you can't see that your spineless defense of this farcical bit of security theater makes you unworthy to empty the colostomy bag of an Iwo vet, then you should just turn in your Lee Greenwood albums, exchange your dollars for dinars, and pull a burkha over your buzzcut, bro, because it's all over here in the Land of the Formerly Free and the Home of the Not-So-Brave.
More importantly, I wouldn't have known about the comments over at Hot Air. See, in the post over there it only took seven comments for some gonadless denizens of Vichy America to turn up and defend the low budget rent-a-cops of the TSA. Seven comments before some toadying sycophants lauded the TSA for defending the American skies from exploding boobies.
Folks, if the jihadis have you quivering under the dust ruffle in fear of nipple-ring-activated breast bombs, then it's time to grab a rusty bayonet and Daniel Pearl yourself live on Al Jazeera because they have won. If you can't see that your spineless defense of this farcical bit of security theater makes you unworthy to empty the colostomy bag of an Iwo vet, then you should just turn in your Lee Greenwood albums, exchange your dollars for dinars, and pull a burkha over your buzzcut, bro, because it's all over here in the Land of the Formerly Free and the Home of the Not-So-Brave.
Mars needs women...
...and California needs moving trucks. In comments here, JT writes:
You don't need to be an econ major to do the math behind that one. Sacramento's already tried taxing the pensions of folks who retire out of state (with their comically inflated Calidollars that go such a long way back in the states because we've foolishly pegged the exchange rate between CA and the US at 1:1.) How long before they just take another page from the Red playbook and build a wall along the border? Not the Cali/Mexican border to keep illegal aliens out, but the NV/AZ border to keepresource units... taxpayers... Californians with jobs in?
When the family and I made our move to The Former Republic 18 months ago, U-Haul quoted us ~$3000 for a one-way rental. I got a quote the same day for a one-way TX->CA rental. $250. I laughed merrily on that one.
You don't need to be an econ major to do the math behind that one. Sacramento's already tried taxing the pensions of folks who retire out of state (with their comically inflated Calidollars that go such a long way back in the states because we've foolishly pegged the exchange rate between CA and the US at 1:1.) How long before they just take another page from the Red playbook and build a wall along the border? Not the Cali/Mexican border to keep illegal aliens out, but the NV/AZ border to keep
We're still waterboarding my muse...
...and she'll spill her guts any minute. In the meantime, have a meme:
In my defense, I've only had two cans of Vault Zero, a Full Throttle Blue Demon, and one cup of coffee this morning, so I'm not quite up to speed yet.
In my defense, I've only had two cans of Vault Zero, a Full Throttle Blue Demon, and one cup of coffee this morning, so I'm not quite up to speed yet.
Today in the news.
Glorious leader launches phallic symbol. He's so ronery. Again.
When the subprime mess augered in, it actually left a crater.
Single, unemployed mother of two eyes nutritious children. All Bush's fault.
When the subprime mess augered in, it actually left a crater.
Single, unemployed mother of two eyes nutritious children. All Bush's fault.
Today In History: Those kooky French.
On this date in 1871 the inhabitants of Gay Paree, still somewhat disoriented from dining on zoo animals during a four month Prussian siege, declared the Commune and instituted a bunch of the fun stuff from the old days of tumbrels and guillotines and Andrew Lloyd Webber musicals, including rearranging the calendar to one with months named "Fog" and "Germination" and forgiving a slew of rents, debts, and interest.
As idealistic revolutions by fuzzy-headed academics often do, it ended with somewhere between 10,000 and all of them being killed by the army.
Coincidentally, on this day in 845AD, Viking raiders looted everything in not-so-Gay-at-the-time Paree that wasn't nailed down and raped most of what was left, and kept putting their feet on the little tables in medieval sidewalk cafes until they were paid to go away by the rather inauspiciously named French monarch, Chuck the Bald.
As idealistic revolutions by fuzzy-headed academics often do, it ended with somewhere between 10,000 and all of them being killed by the army.
Coincidentally, on this day in 845AD, Viking raiders looted everything in not-so-Gay-at-the-time Paree that wasn't nailed down and raped most of what was left, and kept putting their feet on the little tables in medieval sidewalk cafes until they were paid to go away by the rather inauspiciously named French monarch, Chuck the Bald.
Thursday, March 27, 2008
I'm such a little angel.
Memery found at the Munchkin Wrangler, who is apparently a bigger pottymouth than angelic l'il ol' me. (Which should be pretty damned hilarious to anyone who knows us both in Real Life.)
Mysteries of the Universe #457,390:
How come the same lipstick that comes off actual lips in no time whatsoever will remain on a coffee cup through an hour-long blast with rotating jets of scalding hot soapy water?
Business Opportunity: Make a lip primer coat somehow involving glazed ceramic molecules.
Business Opportunity: Make a lip primer coat somehow involving glazed ceramic molecules.
It just keeps getting funnier...
"If we had sensible fire extinguisher laws like they do in England, we wouldn't have all these innocent fires getting extinguished."
"You must have done SOMEthing to provoke the fire, so you deserve whatever you get."
"Are you sure you have the judgement to know when a fire needs extinguishing? Firemen are trained for years to make those calls."
"It'll be like the Wild West, with civilians running around extinguishing barbecue grills and the smoker at Greasy Joe's Rib Joint by mistake."
"You must have done SOMEthing to provoke the fire, so you deserve whatever you get."
"Are you sure you have the judgement to know when a fire needs extinguishing? Firemen are trained for years to make those calls."
"It'll be like the Wild West, with civilians running around extinguishing barbecue grills and the smoker at Greasy Joe's Rib Joint by mistake."
Today In History: Great balls of fire.
On this date in 1977 a KLM 747 commenced its takeoff roll at Tenerife airport. Unfortunately, due to miscommunication and severe fog, a Pan Am 747 was taxiing the other way on the same runway. The result was the Tenerife Disaster, the largest loss of life in a single commercial airline incident to date. As a matter of fact, until an A380 in cattle-car configuration suffers a premature air/ground interface, it's pretty much got the lock on the gruesome record.
Wednesday, March 26, 2008
Does not compute.
We were unpacking the library in the attic and, RobertaX being RobertaX, we were sorting the books into piles by... well, we weren't being Dewey decimal system strict, but it would aid in organized shelving. And it was better than my plan of "Just get them out of the boxes and we can sort 'em later." Besides, it was kinda fun, with her hauling out books, calling out categories, and me running the books to the appropriate stack...
"History. History. Dinosaurs. Guns. General science. Guns. Guns. Novel. Large-format SF. More guns. Humor. Huh?!?" The "Huh" was the Book of Mormon, when I am pretty obviously disqualified by my vast consumption of caffeine and alcohol and my lack of special underwear. I can see where stumbling across that in a box of my books was kinda like running over an alligator. In Iowa.
Well, years back when I was rooming with Marko and still kinda convalescing from my big motorcycle accident, he was out of town on business and I was bored silly and two polite guys came to the door and said something along the lines of "Would you like a free book?" You mean a book like the kind with words in it and "free" as in "no money"? What kind of stupid question is that? Would I like a free book? Jeez, does a big snake crawl low to the ground? I have a hard enough time saying no to books that cost money (in fact I usually don't say "no" at a book store so much as "sorry, I seem to be out of cash,") so I don't much care what the book is about; if it's free, I'm your reader.
So obviously I was absolutely floored when I read at Breda's that they're having a hard time giving away free copies of Fahrenheit 451 at a library in Idaho. Hello? Ray Bradbury? Free? If I didn't already have a copy (and gas was, say, under $2/gallon) I'd be all about a roadtrip to Idaho Falls.
"History. History. Dinosaurs. Guns. General science. Guns. Guns. Novel. Large-format SF. More guns. Humor. Huh?!?" The "Huh" was the Book of Mormon, when I am pretty obviously disqualified by my vast consumption of caffeine and alcohol and my lack of special underwear. I can see where stumbling across that in a box of my books was kinda like running over an alligator. In Iowa.
Well, years back when I was rooming with Marko and still kinda convalescing from my big motorcycle accident, he was out of town on business and I was bored silly and two polite guys came to the door and said something along the lines of "Would you like a free book?" You mean a book like the kind with words in it and "free" as in "no money"? What kind of stupid question is that? Would I like a free book? Jeez, does a big snake crawl low to the ground? I have a hard enough time saying no to books that cost money (in fact I usually don't say "no" at a book store so much as "sorry, I seem to be out of cash,") so I don't much care what the book is about; if it's free, I'm your reader.
So obviously I was absolutely floored when I read at Breda's that they're having a hard time giving away free copies of Fahrenheit 451 at a library in Idaho. Hello? Ray Bradbury? Free? If I didn't already have a copy (and gas was, say, under $2/gallon) I'd be all about a roadtrip to Idaho Falls.
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