Friday, September 03, 2010

Home again, home again, jiggety-jig...

Tired, sore, and sunburned, but I have successfully leveled up in Mall Ninja.

Now, don't get me wrong: There's nothing wrong with having good gear, and it can make a training class a lot more convenient when you're festooned with Cool Guy dump pouches, Camelbaks, and enough loaded magazines to reenact the taking of Fallujah. However, when you look at a picture of the shooters on line at gun school and the only way you can tell the jocked-up SWAT cops from the IT guys on their tactical golf vacations is by whether their flexi-cuff holder is in a basket weave pattern or not, it can make you wonder what the point is.

Off the line, guys are comparing labels on plate carriers and chest rigs as assiduously as style-conscious sorority girls. I recently read a review of a shooting class in which the author name-dropped each piece of gear he used, from the sights on his pistol to the brand of his (I'm not kidding) tactical boots, and then opened his next paragraph with "There's not enough space to cover all the valuable information imparted by the instructor..." and I thought to myself "Well, if you hadn't just pissed away two paragraphs telling me what brand of frickin' tactical underwear you were wearing, there might have been enough space after all."

For what it's worth, my tactical pants in the class were by Wrangler, and they come with two single 30-rd mag pouches, one right over each butt cheek. I can about guarantee that, should the balloon ever go up for real, those will be the pants in which I'll be fighting, so I reckoned I might as well practice fighting in them...

30 comments:

Dave said...

For most of us males, that'd only be one 30 round mag holder...the other one being used as a wallet holder.

ZerCool said...

Clearly, you are not tactical enough, if you aren't EDW'ing your 6.12 sooper-tack-tick-ill zipper-velcro-button-snap-fly cargo-combi-pant-shorts, over your ArmorOvers multi-wicking-evaporating-cooling-insulting knickers...

But I guess we still love you.

Tam said...

Dave,

"For most of us males, that'd only be one 30 round mag holder...the other one being used as a wallet holder."

I am unfashionable enough that I usually carry a small business card holder with my D/L, toter's permit, and plastische geld in my left hip pocket like a dude's wallet, because that way I don't need to carry a purse everywhere just to have the three or four things I really need. There's enough room in there for the mag and the small holder, but some of the giant butt lumps that I've seen guys carry would probably take up too much room to allow a mag in there as well.

Bubblehead Les. said...

I prefer .gov milsurp for my webbing (figure I'd get back some of my Tax Money), and Wally World Class Cargo pants/shorts. I'd rather spend what little free cash I have left under Obamanomics on ammo, magazines, spare parts and and Range fees. Always wonder about those people who spend $50 on a Tacticool pair of pants, yet complain that they can't afford to put a brick of .22lr into their shooting bag and spend an hour or so on the Range at least once a month. They must be expecting that the Tactical Fairy will drop a Rambo Skill Set on them if they are caught in a crisis. But I'm just a middle aged grump, so what do I know...

Anonymous said...

I know several guys who have fancy rigs set up, but couldn't quite seem to enroll in one of three (!!!) local Pat Rogers class. They also seem to have issues actually, you know, shooting in the rigs. I expect if we do have problems locally, the most I'll have on me gear wise would be a couple of Blade-Tech AR magazine pouches.

Eck! said...

I'd be far from tactical cool. Then again I'm a firm believer of be well prepared. I'd spend on the .22mag brick to put in a milsurp pouch or in the jeans I can bend over in, and get dirty. If your going to a party or a fight you go prepared. Seems for one it's all couture the other is able skills to use the available gear. Skills don't need a back pocket.

I do carry a purse, between the netbook, leatherman, and "stuff" I could swing it and do serious damage.


Eck!

Anonymous said...

For every Tactical Tommy who apparently has more pockets than he has brains, there's a Skinflint Sammy who comes to class without adequate equipment to get through -- holding up the entire class and driving everyone crazy with his utterly avoidable gear issues. Saw one not long ago who had affixed a light to his long gun using, no lie, duct tape.

Somewhere there's a happy medium.

WV: strappit. Buy a gun, strappit on.

Adrian K said...

If you people gear up like that for your live fire classes, I don't feel nearly so awkward gearing up like I'm leaving on a round the world trip when I go out for a 3-day weekend motorcycle ride.

Steve Skubinna said...

I have to admit that I went waaaaay up the scale in TactiCool... except none of my gear was name brand, just CTD stuff.

But when I found myself snapping on a vest with radio pouch plus God knows what else I had an embarrassing moment of self-realization. So now I'm back down to a web belt with drop leg holster for the pistol, dual mag pouch for same, and a drop leg three magazine carrier for 5.56 on the other leg.

If I'm planning to shoot a carbine, that is - if I'm just going to shoot pistol, then the 55.6 mag carrier stays off the belt.

Either way, it takes a lot less time and fidgeting to gear up.

But the real question, Tam, since you brought it up, is...

Tactical underwear? Photos?

Matt G said...

FarmDad and I were talking about, at the next Blogorado, having a Robe And Bunny Slippers match. Your name was invoked at this idea, Tam.

Jay G said...

For the love of all that's good and holy, don't invite Robb Allen to that one...

BillyBob said...

I'm confused. Was it the SWAT guys or the IT guys with the basket weave pattern?

ExurbanKevin said...

I agree. Brand-conscious people are the worst.

Signed,

ExKev
Loyal Nissan driver
Mac phreak
CZ75 Nut
Nikon owner

:)

aczarnowski said...

There were three Pat Rogers classes in the area and those guys didn't get to one? *shakes head* My problem is finding a class, any class, in my area! If anybody knows the secret handshake for getting good training near Minneapolis, MN I'd love an introduction...

As for go gear, pistol and mag pouches for same go on the belt I wear every day. The rifle stuff goes in the 5.11 sling bag that's next to the, wait for it, rifle.

When I finally get to carbine school I hope this setup works as well as I see it working in my head. If not, that's what carbine school is for.

Mad Saint Jack said...

Sigh... A missed opportunity.

http://tacticalcorsets.com/

D.W. Drang said...

For Tacticool Pants, I also wear Wranglers--their Riggs line of work wear has multiple pockets, and a hammer loop that doesn't make the britches scream "OPERATOR!" to the world, yet is small enough not to catch on anything--and I'm uncoordinated enough to know.
Although the line I prefer are the "Rangers", so maybe they know that, as well.

staghounds said...

So all the big bathrobe talk was just that.

Keads said...

Oh crap! I'm an IT guy and it appears I need some basket weave! Maybe that is why everyone laughs at me on the range!

Anonymous said...

aczarnowski theres a guy in MN:
http://www.pakieser.com/
Al

jumpthestack said...

Check out Pat Rogers' thoughts on this topic:
http://www.lmsdefense.com/forum/index.php?topic=6833.msg59035

I couldn't find the original reference to Pat's original post, but he had much the same sentiments.

The Jack said...

"I can about guarantee that, should the balloon ever go up for real, those will be the pants in which I'll be fighting, so I reckoned I might as well practice fighting in them... "

This.

And it's not just the carbines. In defensive handgun, I've seen people wear big old thigh strap holsters.

And sure you can carry that way in IN, but I somehow doubt those guys do.

Not to mention people that will go through a class with big iron when their normal carry... isn't.

Breda said...

oh, today would have to be the day that I had to blog about my new tacticool underoos.

og said...

I can't help but think "Giant butt lumps" would make an awesome band name.

D.W. Drang said...

Og: Or something you'd be consulting with your physician about.

Anonymous said...

Hey, I found some of that tactical underwear... http://www.centralchef.com/storefrontprofiles/processfeed.aspx?sfid=123094&i=253315004&mpid=7714&dfid=1

Anonymous said...

Steve, I had a similar "wtf am I doing" moment when I realized I was putting on one of those SWAT-like vests I had ordered from CTD because it was on sale. On the plus side, ammo carrying capacity on it was abundant and meant I didn't have to cram 2 range bags worth of stuff into one. So, I still use it when I'm shooting on our land, but you won't catch me wearing that getup anywhere resembling a public place (including a firing range).

WV: backinju. When the fecal matter hits the oscillating temperature control device, you better hope you have friends backinju up.

Scott said...

"If anybody knows the secret handshake for getting good training near Minneapolis, MN I'd love an introduction..."

Check thecarryforum.com and MNGuntalk.com both have training subforums.

Ross said...

Gee, what a coincidence, Tam! I, too, wear that tacticool Wranglers gear. Jeans AND the concealment vest, too! Got some real funny looks from all the operators in their Oh-Shoot-Me-First vests at the last IDPA shoot, too.

Patrick said...

Tam,
If you just carried a purse, think about how many more magazines you could carry. I don't think you are thinking this through... :)

D.W. Drang said...

It's not a purse, it's a bail-out bag.