Friday, October 05, 2007

You know, now I'm wondering...

What's the best gun for brain-eating amoebas? Could a ninja defeat a brain-eating amoeba?

Obviously the killer space robots would have no problem with brain-eating amoebas, but would they have an effect on zombies?

This is important stuff to know...

15 comments:

Gmac said...

Two lakes I'll go swimming in any time without fear of getting ninja'd by the evil zombie amoebas are Dale Hollow and Smith Lake.
Then again I usually have a wet suit on to keep from suffering hypothermia too.

Murphy said...

The real question here, is What Would Chuck Norris do?

Anonymous said...

hrmmmm, Zombies eat Brains, Amoebas eat brains?

I would think Zombies are immune for the same reason lawyers are safe from sharks (professional courtesy).

comatus said...

Naaah murph, it's what Col. Cooper would do. Chuck Norris, Fred Thompson and Dick Cheney are not valid candidates for amoeba infestation. Homey don't play that.

I wouldn't ask this anywhere but here, but: Once I get the gun up my nose, what do I do next?

Jeff the Baptist said...

I believe the proper gun for amoeba is a super soaker loaded with bleach.

Tam said...

"I wouldn't ask this anywhere but here, but: Once I get the gun up my nose, what do I do next?"

I believe this might be a case where even a big fan of exit wounds like myself would worry about overpenetration...

Anonymous said...

The best gum for brain-eating amoebas is Beeman's or Blackjack. There is some secret ingrediant in either one that renders you immune to infection.

dr mac said...

Metroniadazole bullets, but shoot 'em while you're sober.

dr mac said...

Metroniadazole bullets, but shoot 'em while you're sober.

ExistingThing said...

Brain eating amoebas? Call Samus Aran!

Anonymous said...

Oh, is there no logic left? Of course, when brain-eating ameobas are the problem, the Liliput 4.25 auto is the weapon and round of choice! ;) (Best description of this caliber I've read is, "A dangerous toy." Well, aren't we all?)

Mike in Round Rock said...

Wait, are we trying to shoot the amoebas after they get in our brains, or before they get in our brains, or are we just trying to shoot our brains to save ourselves the suffering caused by the amoebas? Cuz the guns will differ, quite a bit.

For the pre-infection, I think a Little John 105mm atomic howitzer would suffice (if you can't nuke the planet from orbit, just to be sure).

For post infection treatment, let me get ahold of the team from Fantastic Voyage - they had ray guns that could shoot through a blood clot, so I suppose the amoebas would not have a chance. And heck, any opportunity to get a young Sophia Loren in my head is ok by me.

And if I just want to deny the amoebas those tasty warm brain cells I keep in my head, anything from a 22LR up to a 303 British would do. I'd have to use my toe to fire the Enfield, though.

Does that answer the question?

comatus said...

Oh, Mike. Mike, Mike, Mike.

That's the Raquel Welch, not the Sophia Loren.

Weren't really looking at the face, were you?

Rustyvth said...

That's the Raquel Welch, not the Sophia Loren.

Weren't really looking at the face, were you?


She had a face? ;)

TBeck said...

At last! A use for the Velo Dog cartridge!

I'm sure S&W will sell a special "Amoeba Defense" kit with a bright yellow case, sulfa dust, tweezers, and a snub-nosed revolver for finishing the nasty beast off.