Books. Bikes. Boomsticks.
"Hige sceal þe heardra, heorte þe cenre, mod sceal þe mare, þe ure mægen lytlað…"
Two lakes I'll go swimming in any time without fear of getting ninja'd by the evil zombie amoebas are Dale Hollow and Smith Lake.Then again I usually have a wet suit on to keep from suffering hypothermia too.
The real question here, is What Would Chuck Norris do?
hrmmmm, Zombies eat Brains, Amoebas eat brains?I would think Zombies are immune for the same reason lawyers are safe from sharks (professional courtesy).
Naaah murph, it's what Col. Cooper would do. Chuck Norris, Fred Thompson and Dick Cheney are not valid candidates for amoeba infestation. Homey don't play that.I wouldn't ask this anywhere but here, but: Once I get the gun up my nose, what do I do next?
I believe the proper gun for amoeba is a super soaker loaded with bleach.
"I wouldn't ask this anywhere but here, but: Once I get the gun up my nose, what do I do next?"I believe this might be a case where even a big fan of exit wounds like myself would worry about overpenetration...
The best gum for brain-eating amoebas is Beeman's or Blackjack. There is some secret ingrediant in either one that renders you immune to infection.
Metroniadazole bullets, but shoot 'em while you're sober.
Brain eating amoebas? Call Samus Aran!
Oh, is there no logic left? Of course, when brain-eating ameobas are the problem, the Liliput 4.25 auto is the weapon and round of choice! ;) (Best description of this caliber I've read is, "A dangerous toy." Well, aren't we all?)
Wait, are we trying to shoot the amoebas after they get in our brains, or before they get in our brains, or are we just trying to shoot our brains to save ourselves the suffering caused by the amoebas? Cuz the guns will differ, quite a bit.For the pre-infection, I think a Little John 105mm atomic howitzer would suffice (if you can't nuke the planet from orbit, just to be sure). For post infection treatment, let me get ahold of the team from Fantastic Voyage - they had ray guns that could shoot through a blood clot, so I suppose the amoebas would not have a chance. And heck, any opportunity to get a young Sophia Loren in my head is ok by me.And if I just want to deny the amoebas those tasty warm brain cells I keep in my head, anything from a 22LR up to a 303 British would do. I'd have to use my toe to fire the Enfield, though.Does that answer the question?
Oh, Mike. Mike, Mike, Mike.That's the Raquel Welch, not the Sophia Loren.Weren't really looking at the face, were you?
That's the Raquel Welch, not the Sophia Loren.Weren't really looking at the face, were you?She had a face? ;)
At last! A use for the Velo Dog cartridge!I'm sure S&W will sell a special "Amoeba Defense" kit with a bright yellow case, sulfa dust, tweezers, and a snub-nosed revolver for finishing the nasty beast off.
Post a Comment