Friday, September 16, 2011

That '70s Show again.

I don't know about you, but I was watching the events in Cairo recently and thinking "At least Mohammed Reza Pahlavi got a doctor's appointment at Cornell; Mubarak's gonna end up with jumper cables clamped to his junk before this is all over."

Meanwhile, with the peace-loving government in Cairo making ominous noises about the Camp David Accords, is Jimmy Carter going to have to FedEx his Nobel back to Oslo?

(And seriously, Egypt: I have to admire the pluck, but how many ass-whippings do you need to take at the hands of the Israelis before you realize that your days of martial glory were buried with Ramses II? You've been conquered by the Persians, Greeks, Romans, Arabs, French, and British. The only nation you've defeated in war since the discovery of iron is Libya, and they can't even kick their own ass without outside help.)

32 comments:

Stephen said...

Oh, that's good...you crack me up pretty lady....

Robert said...

Someone once said that you can tell the really crazy ones by the number of bumper stickers they have on their car.

Some time ago, I came up behind a beat up car that was doing 45 MPH on the interstate (55 limit), about 100 yards short of the exit ramp I was aiming for. It's entire backside, including at least 80% of the rear window, was covered with various tree hugging, one world, coexist type stickers.

I was understandably anxious to at least get into the decel lane before getting plowed from behind, so I admit I was close to the vehicle as she slowly slid over into the exit lane and meandered down the ramp. She proceeded to turn right at the bottom of the ramp, without so much as a pause for the stop sign. I turned as well, and then into the parking lot for the quik-mart where I always got my morning snack.

Unseen by me, she had U-turned and came into the store behind me. As I'm approching the counter with my stuff, she starts screaming.

Her: "Tailgating is illegal!".

Me: "So is running a stop sign."

Her: "I had to run it cause you were going to hit me if I stopped!"

Me: "I'm amazed that you could even see me with all those stickers on your windows."

Her: "I could kick you in the nuts right now and there's nothing you could do!"

Me: "You mean other than having you arrested for assault?"

Her (as she's going out the door): "I hope you die!"

Me: (smiling) "And you have a good day too!"

Anonymous said...

It does seem like 1967 all over again. A bunch of Arab states with the Turks included now gearing up for a fight.

They should remember in the Six Day War Israel didn't wait and hammered them first.

Gerry

Robert said...

Oh bloody hell. I posted this in the wrong thread. Should have gone in the post just below this one... Duhhh.

Bram said...

Sounds like it's time for the Israelis to perform another air show over the Aswan Dam.

Satanam in computatrum said...

"(And seriously, Egypt: I have to admire the pluck, but how many ass-whippings do you need to take at the hands of the Israelis before you realize that your days of martial glory were buried with Ramses II? You've been conquered by the Persians, Greeks, Romans, Arabs, French, and British. The only nation you've defeated in war since the discovery of iron is Libya, and they can't even kick their own ass without outside help.)"

Dang Tam - you win the internets AGAIN. You keep doing this and you're going to need a display case to show all of 'em off!

Bubblehead Les. said...

"But the Muslim Brotherhood is Peaceful!" (Hillary Rodham Clinton).

Tango Juliet said...

Wait! Weren't we told Mubarak's overthrow by the Muslim Brotherhood was a good thing?

Aw, what the heck. $10 gas is good for the environment.

Kevin Baker said...

She needs to comb her archives and publish a book: Intercontinental Ballistic Thermonuclear Snark: The Writings of Tamara Keel.

It would be a NYT bestseller for a decade, at least.

Bubblehead Les. said...

On a related Note: Good old Peanut Brained Jimmy Carter is supportting the Palestinian U.N. Vote later in the month ("Time to Kill all those JewBoys, y'all"). And Sarkozy was partying in Tripoli with their New Libyan Oil Producing Allies who will base their new Constitution on Sharia Law. You know, the same Sharia Law that he's fighting back home in Paris?

And everyone said George Bush was in the Middle East only for Oil.

Dave H said...

And everyone said George Bush was in the Middle East only for Oil.

You'll notice nobody tried to stop him, either. Just a little tsk-tsking and hand-wringing for show.

Just My 2¢ said...

Tam,
You're absolutely right about Egypt.. and Islamic countries in general. The heydays of enlightenment when Islamic mathematicians led the world and wise rulers brought prosperity are over. It will be interesting to see how their 21st century citizens continue to react to the corrupt, medieval model of government that their religious leaders espouse.

That was heavier than I intended.

Old NFO said...

Both you and Gerry are correct... And yes the Israelis will kick their asses yet again :-)

Anonymous said...

Israel kicking Arab butt: What happens when 20th century intelligence meets 7th century minds...

cap'n chumbucket

Cybrludite said...

Anyone know offhand how high the water behind the Aswan is right now, and how far downstream would the flooding reach if someone were to slam a couple of bunker-busters into the base of it?

VW: pitest. No rounding it down to three!

kishnevi said...

Tam, I think you forget Mamelukes v. Mongols. True, it's about the only one in the plus column for the Egyptians, but it was a big one.

Old Grouch said...

Yabbut in that one the Mamelukes fielded a bunch of Turkish ringers, and the Mongols were playing away...

;)

Justthisguy said...

Dang, Tam, you sure attract the Aspies! There is Cybrludite, and kishnevi, and I, and who knows how many who won't admit to it.

Oh, Mecca? Seventy or eighty megatons worth of hot lithium deuteride should settle their hash.

NotClauswitz said...

I thought the Asawn dam had silted up and the water behind it increased in salinity? An overall net-negative effect is taking place (if you believe the source): The Nile delta was, prior to the dam, the most fertile agricultural region in the world, and the silt rich topsoil over 70 feet deep in places. This is no longer the case, and agriculture in Egypt is now entirely dependent on artificial fertilizers to keep the fields alive.
In addition, Egyptian fields were, prior to the construction of the dam, the only large-scale irrigated agricultural area where soil salinisation did not occur. This was due to the "washing" effect of the inundation in flushing salts from the soil each year. Salinisation of agricultural land is now the single biggest problem in Egyptian agriculture, especially as irrigation methods centre around flood irrigation.
Soil erosion has also increased dramatically, as silt from the inundation no longer replenishes lost material along the riverbank, and also the low-lying delta coastline, which is largely built up on sediment transport from the Nile. As a result, the delta coastline is now heavily eroded, having retreated in some areas by over 1/4 of a mile, threatening the destruction of the brackish delta lagoons which support much of the Egyptian fishing industry, and many coastal settlements. Ironically, at the same time, Lake Naser, the lake formed by the Aswan High Dam, is silting up, reducing both its water storage capacity, and the ability of the dam to generate hydro-electric power.

Contra and relative to that the Economist says: The Aswan high dam, for example, is often cited as a cautionary example, a quixotic construction that now reduces the mighty Nile to a dribble before it trickles to the sea, leaving behind an explosion of water hyacinth, outbreaks of bilharzia, polluted irrigation channels and a build-up of sediment inland that would otherwise compensate for coastal erosion from Egypt to Lebanon. Yet, according to the World Bank, it has provided a bulwark against flooding for buildings and crops, a huge expansion of farming and Nile navigation (lots of tourism) and enough electricity for the whole of Egypt—all of which amounts to the equivalent each year of 2% of GDP in net benefits.

Comrade Misfit said...

Seriously, I don't imagine that the Egyptian military is itching for that fight. Being an Egyptian military officer for the last thirty years has been a pretty good gig. They live extremely well, relative to the rest of the country. The Egyptian military has its own for-profit industries and they are mainly very profitable, with the officers sharing in the profits.

Damn few of them are going to want to upset that applecart by actually going to get shot at.

Open question is how good are the Israelis. It's been nearly 40 years since they had to last fight a heavily-armed and mobile opponent and the Egyptians came uncomfortably close to kicking their asses in `73. The IDF has spent most of their time since chasing guys with AKs and RPGs.

I'd bet on the IDF, though.

rickn8or said...

"She needs to comb her archives and publish a book: Intercontinental Ballistic Thermonuclear Snark: The Writings of Tamara Keel."

It WOULD be nice, but that much snark in one place can't be safe.

Joseph said...

Egypt's been a military pipsqueak for quite a long time.

Isaiah 36:6:

Lo, thou trustest in the staff of this broken reed, on Egypt; whereon if a man lean, it will go into his hand, and pierce it: so is Pharaoh king of Egypt to all that trust in him.

Montie said...

It's posts like this one that remind me why I start here when reading up on my favorite blogs!

avidus said...

Given that we've re-armed Egypt through our $1.2B annual aid provided you spend it on our bombs, bullets and tanks program it will be interesting if IFF shows the IDF as friendly.

The Turks have that problem and announced this week that they are in the process of ripping out all the US supplied IFF so they can start targeting Israelis.

I do wonder if there are a few off switches remaining should someone start using our wares against one of our allies.

the pawnbroker said...

A thing of beauty, that last para...tossed in as a parenthetical aside, no less.

Girl can write her ass off.

Thanks, TK.

Greg said...

Look up 'Ain Jalut'. if you're gonna snark, get it RIGHT.

Tamara (remotely) said...

Gosh, Greg, you're right! I'd never heard of the Mamluk Sultanate before!

This is blog, not a frickin' textbook, ya aspie. Lighten up.

[Professor Frink voice]"Aactually... *snort* ...it wasn't a chicken that crossed the road, but a rooster. Get it right, Krusty!"[/Professor Frink voice]

Tamara (remotely) said...

PS: ...and I'm surprised I wasn't chided for omitting the Hyksos from the list.

Old Grouch said...

"...that much snark in one place can't be safe."

Oh, I dunno... I've heard there are still a few original editions of Brann The Iconoclast around that haven't self-combusted yet.

Montie said...

OMG Tam,

You're right not only did you forget the Hyksos, but remember the Nubians finally kicked Egyptian ass in the 25th dynasty!

Everybody wants to play the one upsmanship game, but you're right it's a blog not a frickin' textbook, why can't that wonderful turn of phrase be appreciated for its sheer snarky beauty, instead of nitpicking for every half-assed military power that's had their way with Egypt since the Sahara turned to sand?

wv: stone (you need a coupla those to think you can best Tam in military history trivia of ANY era)

David said...

If things turn all shooty over there Israel needs to decide how much of the aggressor's territory they think they want, or can control, then take it, and keep it.

You start a shooting war and lose you should pay with territory.

Then figure out how wide a security perimeter they want around their new, larger country, 10 miles, 50 miles, whatever - take it, turn it into a desolate wasteland and then let their new smaller neighbors know that they will destroy anything and anyone they find in that area.

Justthisguy said...

David, you are all rational and reasonable in yer comment there.

You, too, must be an Aspie, unfamiliar with how the Normals act, because the normal human monkeys would never accede to a proposal like yours,sensible as it is.