Tuesday, August 26, 2014

Boy, I really feel jaded...

...when I read something like this:
"I have been fortunate enough to shoot many, many different firearms over the course of my life. While I have enjoyed most, a precious few have made their way into my heart as towering giants that provide an unparallelled shooting experience that is meant to be savored and appreciated."
...and my first thought is "'Savored and appreciated'? What the f$## does that even mean?"

*rolls powder smoke around in mouth before exhaling slowly* "Ah, yes... A fine Eastern European single-base... Late Cold War vintage? Smoky, with a hint of ammonia and a lingering aftertaste of fart."
.

40 comments:

RevolverRob said...

If someone asked me to make up a list of the most boring guns on the planet, it would pretty much look like that...After awhile they are all kind of boring.

One of my favorite quotes that sums this up is by Parnelli Jones, who when asked if he had a favorite car to drive responded once with something like, "After awhile all the dashboards look the same..."

-Rob

Ken O said...

The ones I enjoy most have an attachment to family and friends who are gone. Granddad's Model 42 Winchester, Great Granddad's 1911, the deer rifle I bought from my friend Mark and so on.

og said...

I followed the link hoping he was talking about a bespoke holland and holland double, or perhaps karamojo bell's actual 7mm rigby, but...no.

Paul said...

"aftertaste of fart"? Now that is funny right there.

Boat Guy said...

You came up with the perfect response to such preciousness, Tam. I almost didn't get through the second sentence 'cause my eyeballs were rolling up to vertical. Jeez. Some refugee from a Junior College Creative Writing course?
Even though my 1967 Model 27 5" is an amazing piece of mechanical art, I couldn't get anywhere near that gooey about it.

Glenn said...

There is nothing wrong with using the word "savor" out of the context of food. You can "savor the moment", although in the writers example, his crime was redundancy.

Tam said...

Glenn,

"There is nothing wrong with using the word "savor" out of the context of food."

I'm sorry, did you infer that I had said there was?

Tam said...

(And his crime was prolixity.)

Anonymous said...

I guess I'll be the contrarian and say I thought the article intro was heartfelt. I know I've experienced and savored a special feeling of peace while out on a nice day unhurriedly shooting certain firearms. Funny thing, the ones that have done it for me are rolling block rifles, Lone Eagle with .38 Special wadcutters, and a full-length tack-driving Turk Mauser (yes, such an odditiy actually exists). You know I'm an Knob Creeker, but MGs are a very different type of experience. Extremely fun, yes, but they just didn't generate that feeling of peace and solitude. To each his own, but I know what Alex is talking about and FWIW I can't argue with his #1 pick - it just makes perfect sense to me.

And don't get me started on the smell of fired paper shotgun shells...or even Aguila .22's.

Aaron - the gunshow ammo guy

Anonymous said...

OK, I had to look up the meaning of the word prolixity, now I get a little more of what you meant to convey...but I guess I'm still naive and unjaded.

Aaron - the happy-go-lucky gunshow ammo guy :-)

mikee said...

That absolutely boring S&W Model 10 police trade-in that I bought as my second gun ever, and used for a few years, and traded away, not knowing at the time that it had the best trigger on a handgun I would ever experience, yes, I savor the memory of shooting that one. I could actually hit what I aimed at, because of that trigger, and younger eyes, and inexpensive ammo that allowed me to practice a lot.

mikee said...

And I didn't see a good single shot 22LR on that list - teaching my kids to shoot has been the most wonderful shooting experience I've had.

Tam said...

Aaron,

I'm not happy about being jaded, mind you. It was kinda sad-making when someone pointed out that I wasn't even cracking a grin while firing that Kriss buzzgun on video.

Maybe I'll take up shotgunning, just to try something new. Never really done any wingshooting.

Cincinnatus said...

Prolixity aside, its a goddam listacle.

Joseph said...

I'd say you need a vacation, but from what?

Drang said...

@Joseph: *Cringes at sudden vision of Tam working as a Walmart greeter as a vacation*

Anonymous said...

I think "cordite" placed somewhere in the footnote would have enhanced the bouquet.

Tony said...

Hard to imagine anyone who uses these things waxing prolixic over them; just like it's hard to imagine my farmer grandpa getting too het up over a plow...

billo said...

A couple of weeks ago, one of my godchildren came up to spend a week with my wife and me out in a rural part of Virginia. The boy, aged 12, had been raised in the city and had never spent much time outdoors. He'd never been fishing. He'd never fired a weapon. He'd never been hunting. So I planned to take him out in the forest and let him see the sights, out on the Chesapeake and let him see the water.

His parents said they'd be fine if I took him shooting, so I did. Nothing special -- I set up some targets behind the house and brought out my AR-15, , the Remington .22 rifle my father got me when I was around 11 years old, a shotgun, and a couple of pistols for him to fire.

After the basic safety and ear protection stuff, I let him shoot until he got tired of it -- which turned out to be about a week's pay worth of ammunition. As you might expect, he really enjoyed the .22 rifle, since it wasn't as loud and didn't have much recoil. He must have fired over a hundred rounds through it.

When he was done (and I was looking at dismay at all the brass on the floor of my deck), he had the biggest grin on his face I've ever seen. I enjoy shooting, but I had forgotten how much fun it was to shoot when I was a kid. Maybe its not such a bad thing to get into that mindset again now and then.

Knucklehead said...

Heh now, if you've ever sat behine Ma Duece on her tripod and let her do her thing you know you can certainly savor the fillings that got shook loose. And if you've ever popped your head out of the loaders hatch at the precise instant the tank next to you on the firing line let loose with the 105mm rifle you can certainly appreciate why you were wearing that helmet.

And and H&K submachinegun is pretty darned close to sublime.

Tam said...

Knucklehead,

Fifties are pretty fun; a little bit goes a long way for me, though. Especially if I'm going to be expected to help clean the thing.

I did mag dumps from MP5s almost every night at work for years. (Well, not mag dumps; I'd usually only load five or ten rounds in the stick. That stuff costs money.)

Knucklehead said...

I once had the extreme good fortune to (lose my hearing) be one of about 8 or 10 of us who were selected to do a "Berlin Occupation" force "cross-training" with subs. US (M-3), British (Sten), French (lord knows what, it was forgettable and made me proud to be hauling an M3 along) and German Polizie (H&K, don't recall what model.)

We spent a couple hours emptying mags from the lot. What good fun.

And of course we had to qualify ever couple eons.

BTW, I may be the only person I can think of who liked the M3 grease gun. Of course the H&K was from another planet back then. The Sten didn't suck. Whatever the French thing was sucked.

Critter said...

guess i can die now. i've shot all those.

James said...

Tam I am a little surprised at your attitude if you never felt this way, I would a least respect his honest emotions.

Tam said...

People can feel how they want to, but I've never really been down with over-emoting.

Cincinnatus said...

Whoa, now, the idea of an "over-emoting" Tam ... that's scary right there.

;-)

Darrell said...

I recall reading of some great white hunter type, whose stock in trade was quarter bores and bigger, saying that there were a few guns he'd regretted pulling the triggers of. As in permanent damage, IIRC.

Keith said...

Her blonde ponytail flapping in the breeze, she was as cold, emotionless, and mechanical as the guns she used. We had never seen her smile, not once during those long, dark years. We all wondered what had made her like this. Though perhaps she had always been this way, her cool, calculating logic as much a part of her as the color of her eyes.

Tam said...

I'm a regular fuckin' Vulcan, I am.

DaveFla said...

I'm with Tam. Along with the occassional misused apostrophe, I couldn't tell the difference between that and the last time my preteen niece came up with ten reasons why she needs to be Mrs. Justin Bieber.

Sebastian said...

Anyone who would put the M1 Garand on a list of pleasurable firearms to shoot hasn't ever had M1 thumb happen. I like my M1, but in the "holding a piece of history in my hands," and, "holding the same firearm my grandfather carried in the war," sense. It's not the most ergonomically friendly rifle in the world to shoot. I wouldn't call shooting it a pleasure.

Tom the Impaler said...

Over emoting might not be the real problem, when you transition from "Am" to "Pro" the fun is nearly required to dry up. I've never owned a Ruger 10-22 I didn't like and I still pine for the PS-90 I lost due to a tax phale a few years ago. I've had great fun with a great number of things that go bang. But when someone asks if a Judge is a good gun for concealed carry or self defense the fun dries up and dies and you have to tell the friend/family/noob to pass Satan by and get something that'll go bang reliably, feed cheaply and hide easily. Save on the scroll work and spend on the ammo. ditch kitsch and go with something known.

Scott J said...

I've always thought Eastern European had more of an essence of wet dog aftertaste :)

P.M. said...

Y'all are fairly jaded. And that's OK.

I carry nondescript, functional handguns, but I did get a tingle when the author talked about "a good 1911."

An instructor let me run a few mags through his Wilson Combat once and it was a sweet kinaesthetic experience. It felt less like tool use than handgun shooting usually does, and more like acquiring a new sense, or reaching out to touch the plates with my new 50-foot long fingers. It was memorable.

It's probably relevant that I've never owned a 1911.

Unknown said...

I'll emote some sadness that I've completed the list except the belt fed.

billf said...

Tam,The first few times someone goes shooting,it can be exciting,and if they like it,it can lead to more and more.After a while,it may get to be 'old habit',unless they try a different gun,or different shooting experience (like three gun,or moving targets).
Eventually,someone may get a job in a gun store,or as a shooting magazine writer,and go to the range with a box'o bullets,just to see how many rounds it takes for the gun to fail or otherwise act up.To this individual,I can imagine that shooting one gun or another has maybe lost it's newbie excitement.Like a mountain climber who climbs to check another one off the list,and doesn't really enjoy the view any more.
I shoot because I enjoy shooting more than I do almost anything else,and I have some favorite guns,either because they mean something to me personally,or because they're rare,or extremely accurate,and I can amaze myself every time.
I worked in motorsports for 35 years,and at the end,I still loved to get to the track at 0'dark 30,and work on the car,and plan the race strategy,and I was still thrilled when we did well.Lately however,when I watch a race,I'm rarely excited for the victor,all I can see is the 'screwed up pitstop that cost somebody the race',or the crash that will require extra hours after midnight to repair it.Maybe that's where you are right now.But I don't belittle the guys who still get that thrill of showing up to the track with high expectations.
I read your blog every day,because it's informative and (sometimes)even funny.But I can't stand cat stories.Shall I tell you how much I don't understand how a grown woman with so much going for her can fawn over keeping a useless wild animal for a pet and waste valuable interent resources telling the world about her precious?Just sayin.

Boat Guy said...

I'm with Knucklehead on the M3. No aethestics at all; sheer performance.
Ah, but a Ma Deuce? Not so much on a ground tripod, but especially on the Navy Mk 26 "Soft Mount"; that's about as close to savory as one can expect with GI anything.

Ted N said...

Belt fed, M16, rented an MP5 for a mag dump, and a few magazines through a buddy's 1911, a Kimber IIRC.

Will said...

Standard Luger 9mm. An uncle brought one to hunting camp. I used the first shot to find POI/POA relation, then knocked off as many soup cans from the top of the target holder as there was rounds in the mag. First and last time I shot one. Part of the experience was the dead silence, and stares, of everyone at the camp when they saw this performance. :D

At that range, it shot low and to one side. I suspect it was a regular thing for them to bang away with it, and not hit much. Probably a bring-back from his WW2 service, which was only 20 years prior. They were friends of dad, most with WW2 and/or Korea service.

Ken O said...

Wing shooting leads to tasty vittles. Go For It!