Thursday, November 11, 2010

Dear Mr. or Ms. Royalty:

While monitoring enemy radio traffic this morning, I heard...
It was two years ago, at 4 a.m. at her apartment in Maryland, that Peggielene Bartels got the news from West Africa. A relative called from Ghana to say that her uncle, the king of the fishing village of Otuam, had died.
...and I blurted out "I get two or three of those emails a week!"
.

8 comments:

Ancient Woodsman said...

"And when we poured libation and did the rituals, as soon as we mentioned your name, it started vaporing and we were surprised. So we did it three times. So that's when we got to know that you are the king." Sounds way too much like: "Listen, strange women lyin' in ponds distributin' swords is no basis for a system of government. Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses, not from some farcical aquatic ceremony."

Unfortunately, the first one appears to be real. What planet did I just wake up on?

Anonymous said...

Peggielene? Her mama must be from Southern Ghana...

AT

Anonymous said...

And it looks like King Peggy has been scarfin' the whole damn village's grits n' gravy...AT

nbc said...

Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses

Unless you happen to have a Death Star in orbit.

Jennifer said...

I had the exact same reaction! Glad it wasn't just me.
And now I also know I'm not the only one listening to enemy radio in the mornings.

Armed Texan said...

U.S. Constitution, Article 1, Section 9, Paragraph 8:
No Title of Nobility shall be granted by the United States: And no Person holding any Office of Profit or Trust under them, shall, without the Consent of the Congress, accept of any present, Emolument, Office, or Title, of any kind whatever, from any King, Prince, or foreign State.

But, hey, since we ignore the constitution for things like health care reform and drug laws, I guess this doesn't apply either.

Anonymous said...

Armed Texan:

But, hey, since we ignore the constitution for things like health care reform and drug laws, I guess this doesn't apply either.

Yeah, and it no longer applies to eligibility, either...

cap'n chumbucket

Tam said...

Armed Texan,

BZZZZZTTTTTT!

Read it again:

"No Title of Nobility shall be granted by the United States: And no Person holding any Office of Profit or Trust under them..."

The United States did not grant this title of noblility.

Further, King Peggy holds no Office of Profit or Trust from the United States.

Relax. I f you were discovered to be the thirty-seventh Earl of Swampmire tomorrow, you could go claim your booby-prize without losing your citizenship, unless you got elected to national office or took a federal gig.