Wednesday, March 26, 2008

Does not compute.

We were unpacking the library in the attic and, RobertaX being RobertaX, we were sorting the books into piles by... well, we weren't being Dewey decimal system strict, but it would aid in organized shelving. And it was better than my plan of "Just get them out of the boxes and we can sort 'em later." Besides, it was kinda fun, with her hauling out books, calling out categories, and me running the books to the appropriate stack...

"History. History. Dinosaurs. Guns. General science. Guns. Guns. Novel. Large-format SF. More guns. Humor. Huh?!?" The "Huh" was the Book of Mormon, when I am pretty obviously disqualified by my vast consumption of caffeine and alcohol and my lack of special underwear. I can see where stumbling across that in a box of my books was kinda like running over an alligator. In Iowa.

Well, years back when I was rooming with Marko and still kinda convalescing from my big motorcycle accident, he was out of town on business and I was bored silly and two polite guys came to the door and said something along the lines of "Would you like a free book?" You mean a book like the kind with words in it and "free" as in "no money"? What kind of stupid question is that? Would I like a free book? Jeez, does a big snake crawl low to the ground? I have a hard enough time saying no to books that cost money (in fact I usually don't say "no" at a book store so much as "sorry, I seem to be out of cash,") so I don't much care what the book is about; if it's free, I'm your reader.

So obviously I was absolutely floored when I read at Breda's that they're having a hard time giving away free copies of Fahrenheit 451 at a library in Idaho. Hello? Ray Bradbury? Free? If I didn't already have a copy (and gas was, say, under $2/gallon) I'd be all about a roadtrip to Idaho Falls.

20 comments:

staghounds said...

Not to mention your abject failure to be an abject shared wife.

I read it for the same reason I read the Koran- not meeting my MDR of crazed ravings. It's still around here someplace.

vinnie said...

Take the book of Mormon with you if you go. You'll need it.

Alcibiades mczombie said...

What about books advertised on late-night television? I'm scared of this "Dianetics" book.

rickn8or said...

Tam--

You did a Good Thing, taking that Book of Mormon off the streets.

What if some child had gotten a'holt of it?

(Tell the truth, do you keep it under or on top of your copy of the Koran?)

Rustmeister said...

I used to have a lot of Hare Krishna books, got 'em the same way.

I really liked the artwork, the text, on the other hand....

og said...

"my lack of special underwear."

For some, any underwear you've ever worn is special. If you mean magic underwear, well, i guess that's less a function (in your case of how they';re made than what they contain.

Damn. Out loud again, huh?

Anonymous said...

Judgeing from the little I've read the Book of Mormon is pretty entertaining - at least in the " religious tome" category - which admittedly isn't exactly a tough league.

And if I had to be stuck on a desert island with very religious people, mormons are high on my list of "least disagreable".

Bond007 said...

Tam,

Thank you for telling me about "my lack of special underwear". I had no idea that LDS believers did that and had to use Google to understand the reference. It is 6:48 AM in Michigan and I need a drink and there is no alcohol in my house.

Roberta X said...

Og -- so you're the one that bids ours up on eBay? Thanks!

...Sorting Tam's library is a proxy for sorting mine. I have science fiction sorted and shelved through "O" and into "P" and all the cookbooks are in the kitchen but there are boxes and boxes labelled things like "Old Radio Books" and "Engineering -- Popular Accounts" (Henry Petroski, etc.) and "Freedom Books" and for those, I have not even got shelves yet!

--So, who else has The Upanishads?

Breda said...

Heh. Thanks for the link.

Have you or Roberta ever heard of librarything.com? Free online cataloging! I fantasize about every book in our house with tidy little labels on the spine, in perfect Dewey order - and a little old fashioned card catalog. Someday!

B&N said...

Fahrenheit 451 should be required reading for everyone, every year, including adults, from age 8 until expiration from this world.

Simply a travesty.

Mark Alger said...

I have upon occasion encountered books that, once I read them, you could NOT give me. And, sad to say, that was after having paid for them.

Full retail.

I don't usually trash books. If I don't want them anymore, I take them to Half Price Books or donate them to Goodwill or something.

These I trashed. Truly awful.

M

BobG said...

"--So, who else has The Upanishads?"

Guilty. I have copies of most of the world's religious books/teachings in the non-fiction part of my library.

Gregg said...

See, I always have trouble deciding whether I should put the religous/philosophical texts in fiction or non-fiction. As a result they tend to occupy that grey zone between the two categories.

Anonymous said...

Was in the book store yesterday, bought Bradbury's, "Bradbury Stories", for my 10 yr old.
Being as I gave away my 'library' during the great move to ATL in '92 my bookshelf is mainly technical & networking stuff nowadays...

Gmac

Anonymous said...

Once worked with a fellow who offered me a book. I said sure, and offered him one in return. I still have my free Book of Mormon. He never did take The Godmakers.

Anonymous said...

Going to grad school at UofU in Salt Lake City was a real Mormon education. SLC is about 50/50 give or take Mo vs. Non-Mo. The rest of the state runs around 90% Mo. The Church has two big conventions a year.

With that context in mind, the paper of record is the Deseret News. Each month they publish the alcohol sales for the county and state so you can see it. Being a scientist I started graphing this.

Interesting that there are two BIG spikes in the alcohol consumption in the state and both occur during the conventions. You can explain some of it to us Non-Mo's drinking to get away from it, but statistically I would venture to guess that a lot of "them" are drinking also.

The other thing I remember is the main Mormon TV station (KSL?) broadcasting interviews where these guys told their visions. This made no sense until we were told that they had to get voted in so this was a campaign type speech.

Final thing I really remember was the utter shock among the Mo's that we were married, my wife and I were both in grad school and we had no kids. The mere idea that we could be nearly 24 and no kids was just astonishing to them.

Zendo Deb said...

I love The Upanishads, unfortunately, space is severely limited on a boat. If you know who Joseph Campbell was - he produced some taped lectures that include great snippets from the Upanishads... told in his great style.

Get the new translation of Beowulf by Seamus Henley (?)

Check out Gilgamesh - as a bonus it is very short.

The Odyssey (don't like the Iliad too much)

Rick C said...

I realize this is a late comment, but "nobody wants the book you're giving out" can't be considered censorship for any reasonable meaning of the word.

David said...

No, but it can be just as bad if not worse. See Fahrenheit 451, as noted in the original post.

By the way, the plaintiff in the NRA's San Francisco gun-ban case is named Guy Montag Doe.

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