Thursday, April 29, 2010

Get a tan, go to jail.

Meanwhile, back in the XIIth Century...
"The public expects us to act firmly and swiftly if we see any social misbehavior by women, and men, who defy our Islamic values," Brigadier Hossien Sajedinia said.

"In some areas of north Tehran we can see many suntanned women and young girls who look like walking mannequins," he continued. "We are not going to tolerate this situation and will first warn those found in this manner and then arrest and imprison them."
Whoah.

Yeah, this is the kind of guy I want having access to nuclear weapons. Evil is one thing; evil, crazy, and dumber than a bag of hammers is another matter altogether. They might decide to nuke Cozumel to save the Earth.

23 comments:

Weer'd Beard said...

And here I thought you were going to talk about Obama's personal war on tanning parlors.

Only so long before these stories merge methinks.

Tam said...

By God, let Boehner be Boehner! ;)

2yellowdogs said...

Tam, Tam, Tam. You have NOTHING to worry about. The current administration has the whole Iranian nuclear thingy well in hand. Haven't you read about the smart diplomacy and firm sanctions that are being employed - as we speak! - designed to turn this situation right around?

Such a worry-wart!

Anonymous said...

And this is different from Obamacare how?

Shootin' Buddy

taylor said...

Nuke Cozumel?

Hmm...actually...

word verification: sessesi - spanish for metrosexual yes-man.

perlhaqr said...

All right, I know someone's gonna call me a racist for this one, but... how do Iranians tan? I mean... how can you tell? Aren't they already pretty much that color to start with?

Joel said...

C'mon, Tam. You know you want to try on a burka. Think of the concealed carry possibilities!

og said...

I don't think they make burkas in extra tall. it would only go down to Tam's knees.

docjim505 said...

If the Iranian girl I knew in college is any example, then the mullahs are free to send as many of their wanton, tanned women over here as they like!

Anonymous said...

perlhaqr said...

snippage... how do Iranians tan?

Not well,

I had an Iranian roomie in college.
One long weekend at the lake and he looked like fresh cooked lobster.

the laugher was he was from somewhere on the Persian gulf and should have known about glare etc off water.

oh well,

some folks have to learn the hard way.

woerm/thr

wv: alione,

no he needed aloe vera not alione.

Joanna said...

See, this is why James Bond is such a popular, enduring franchise. It lets us pretend that the evil in the world is highly intelligent, intellectual and reasonable -- not that Bond villains aren't insane, but there's a recognizable logic to their madness.

Unfortunately, the closest the real world gets to a Bond villain is George Soros, and it all goes downhill from there.

staghounds said...

“Lazy, industrious, clever, and stupid- each officer generally possesses two of these qualities.

Almost all are stupid and lazy, they will be used as ordinary line officers and will perform adequately.

The clever and industrious are fitted for the highest staff appointments.

The man who is clever and lazy is for the very highest command. He has the temperament and the nerves to deal with all situations.

But whoever is stupid and industrious is a menace, and must be removed immediately.”

Von Hammer Steiner-Equord

JC said...

@ Joel - Concealed carry, maybe, but access? Quick draw from under the pup tent just ain't happening!

perlhaqr said...

If we custom make Tam a burqa in her size, she could probably CCW a Nagant. With the bayonet. :D

Joel said...

JC - I've never actually gotten all that close to a burka, so I don't know. But does Islamic law forbid pass-through slots? 'Cause yeah, you'd need one for the holster. Or to work the trigger and bolt on the Nagant. Or to reload the brass cannon, for that matter.

But still, I'm just sayin'. Good luck to that cop who brags he 'can always tell when somebody's carrying.'

WV=excia. I am not!

reflectoscope said...

I maintain that if Iran want nuclear materials that badly, the US Navy I'm sure would be happy to oblige. (If so directed.) (30 minutes or its free!)

Jim

The Jack said...

"See, this is why James Bond is such a popular, enduring franchise. It lets us pretend that the evil in the world is highly intelligent, intellectual and reasonable -- not that Bond villains aren't insane, but there's a recognizable logic to their madness."

Joanna this is also why conspiracy theories are so popular.

Obviously bad things happen because of a highly motivated and super inteligent group that controls everything.

Their plans all run like clockwork and never fail due to bad luck, incompetence, sloth, or simply being too damn big.

Turther's I'm looking at you.

Of course the Iranians have their own conspiracies about the Jews.

rickn8or said...

I've long maintained that the chief failure of islam is that it fails to recognize and appreciate women for the wonderful, delightful and magickal creatures that they are.

Kristopher said...

Perlhacker: Iranians are mostly light skinned Caucasians ... which makes sense, as Iran is near the Caucuses.

Joanna said...

[Islam] fails to recognize and appreciate women for the wonderful, delightful and magickal creatures that they are.

A) I'm no more "magickal" than you are, honey. Don't run me down, but don't put me on a pedestal, either. I'm a regular human being, just like you.

B) You wanna get anywhere with me, you gotta learn to spell.

Geodkyt said...

Kristopher:

Crazy talk! Next you'll be mentioning things like the word "Iran" is a corruption of "Aryan".

(What? The Aryan people who came out of the Aisan steppes via the mountains aren't blue eyed blondes with milky white skin? Ooops. . . )

Seriously, Perlhaker -- the Persians are (primarily) ethnically hillfolk, not dester dwellers. They haven't been in Iran long enough to fully adapt. Of course, there is plenty of admixture from India and the Arab lands to help out in the melanin department, but these are some of the people closest to what the real meaning of "Caucasian" is. . . just like most Afghans.

Of course, if you run around in teh sun with no hat like Achmed Imanutjob, and you'll eventually get pretty tan in the visible parts too. That's why his skin looks like Texan hardpan. Sun damage.

Sendarius said...

... and now for something different:


UN appoints Iran to position on Commission on the Status of Women.

http://www.thenational.ae/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20100501/FOREIGN/704309844/1002

reflectoscope said...

A) I'm no more "magickal" than you are, honey. Don't run me down, but don't put me on a pedestal, either. I'm a regular human being, just like you.

B) You wanna get anywhere with me, you gotta learn to spell.


A. Fair point.
B. But you don't?

Jim