Friday, May 07, 2010

Lending a whole new meaning to "Security Theater".

Security theater went from Kabuki to Punch and Judy this week in Miami, when a TSA groper-in-training got a little out of hand.

It seems that the trainee, one Rolando Negrin, was used as the demonstrator in the new see-through probulator, and the instructor made unkind remarks about the size of his junk, (or more precisely, the lack thereof,) in front of the class.

Rolando, manliness all affronted, waited for his instructor in the parking lot after class and proceeded to administer a beatdown with a PR-24.

I suppose we've gotta prosecute the guy, but thus far this has all the makings of a classic NHI incident, as far as I'm concerned.


(H/T to Unc.)

27 comments:

og said...

Look! It's just like a dick, only smaller!

Bob said...

Had he accepted the joke, only his coworkers would have known about his tiniwini, now the whole USA knows. He should have thought that one out a bit more.

Christina LMT said...

No fair! Hi might be a "grower" rather than a "show-er", after all.

Stuart the Viking said...

What are we going to do with kids these days? Instead of getting himself into hot water by beating the instructor up, maybe he should have gone to the instructor's supervisor (lawyer in tow). It is MUCH better to get the instructor fired and maybe a little hush hush money than to get urself in jail.

Now, that having been said. There was a time in America when jerks like this instructor got the smackdown they richly deserved the police would just laugh and look the other way. I understand "protecting the weak", and I appreciate it as much as the next guy, but sometimes people DESERVE a little NJP. If only we could figure out a way of codifying that.

I guess I'm a dreamer.

s

Anonymous said...

Rule of life 137A

Never ridicule people who have access to batons or tazers.

Especially if they know where you park your car.

Gerry

og said...

Rule #1: Don't get caught.

"No fair! Hi might be a "grower" rather than a "show-er", after all"

Actually, most crackers are. If we based our self esteem on the size of mr happy when not in use, we'd be in deep crap. Only the stunning difference between "Stowed" and "Active" modes is important.

I used to shower with 200 guys every farging day. Eventually, you can't not notice.

alath said...

Does anyone know exactly when the rules changed, such that @$$wholes can throw the kind of insults around that merit a sound @$$stomping, without expecting to get their @$$es stomped?

'Cause I don't think it's turned out to be such a good plan, and I'd like to get the ruling reversed.

perlhaqr said...

NHI?

bdickens said...

The world was somehow a better place when jackasses like the instructor got the snot beaten out of them for their shitty behavior. Some people just deserve to get beaten up.

Back when people were liable to have to cash the checks they let their mouths write, they were a lot more polite.

Lewis said...

perhlhaqr:

No Harm Involved?

Old Grouch said...

I'd love to be on the jury.

Verdict: "Not guilty with standing ovation."

Tennessee Budd said...

As a former sailor, I agree with Og. You can't not notice.
I am glad we honkies are built that way, though: I'd hate to have to use what I appear to be packing when it's 25 degrees.

Tam said...

alath,

"Does anyone know exactly when the rules changed..."

In 37BC, Centurion Naughtius Maximus of Legio X made fun of the small gladius of recruit Flavius Tinius from Calabria, who flipped and took a swing at the Centurion. Flavius was subsequently crucified.


perlhaqr,

NHI = No Humans Involved.
I have a hard time getting worked up about TSA-on-TSA violence. It'd tickle me ever so if they all made like the Gingham Dog and the Calico Cat...

D.W. Drang said...

I thought they said those things, um, er, those scanner things would have the image blurred or something...?
Also, if this guy was a new hire, DHS's background check system seems to work about as well as the rest of it...
Locally, the TSA went through some sort of touchy-feely training to help them deal with the public, apparently it either wasn't a national program, or it didn't take...

og said...

I plan on wearing a codpiece that has letters sewn on using silver solder that say "pervert"

the pawnbroker said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

But...size doesn't matter, right ladies? Ladies? Right? RIGHT???

OMG, I can never fly again!

Srsly, though...you know our wives and daughters will be the subject of after-work-banter-over-a-beer..."Holy shit, you shoulda seen the hooters on that one chick today!"...or, "Man, for a little 'tween, that lolly had it goin' on!".

I predict this won't be the last violence associated with the peek-a-boo process.

AT

wv: horsers...well, that's just cruel!

alath said...

Don't you all just feel safer now, knowing that these kind of clowns are out there protecting us every day?

Tam said...

alath,

"...these kind of clowns are out there protecting us..."

Is that what they're doing, then? I was kinda wondering...

D.W. Drang said...

Theoretically, if we all write angry letters to our congresscritters... After January, that is.

Joel said...

I do confess...

When I first read the article I thought about times in the past when I shared locker room showers with a bunch of Hispanic guys, any and all of whom gave me a terrible inferiority complex without saying a word. Kinda gave me the impression that that business about black guys having huge apparati might just not be unique to their genome, y'know? So if what we're dealing with here is a Hispanic TSA drone with a freakishly small package, it definitely would have behooved him to steer clear of the scanner. Or, as somebody else already said, take steps not to get his name (and backstory) in the national news. Because there's no going back now. :^)

OA said...

Hispanics? Really? Cripes, when underwear production moved south of the border I found the room in the crotch of said keeper of junk away from the machinery suddenly got much smaller. I think I used the words "nubbin-dicked", amongst others, to describe them. Haven't seen anything to be proud of when they're drunk and shaking it at people, either.

You might want to crack open a human sexuality book...specifically, average size amongst the races. Should help with the inferiority complex porn has put into so many.

Silver the Evil Chao said...

You know, I don't get it. Instead of showing the images to humans, why not instead run it through a computer that searches for abnormal shapes around the body? Using an algorithm or something? I mean, astronomers have computers that comb the skies and check against specific shapes, I don't see why the same principle wouldn't work here. Instead of having pervy guards looking at you through a screen...

Any idea if these sick bastards have these at Dallas International?

atlharp said...

Yep, that's Florida.

reflectoscope said...

One more reason not to fly. Not on commercial airlines anyway.

Jim

tickmeister said...

I've often had a thought whenever I see or hear an advertisement for hair restoration or penis enlargement, both products of which I would logically be a part of the target demographic.

Said thought being that never in my checkered life have I been in a situation that would likely have turned out better if I had more hair or a bigger clinton.

Brad K. said...

OK.

I know, "We're from the government, and we're here to help." I got it, one of the three biggest lies, after "Your check is in the mail," and as one manager euphemised, "I won't pee in your pocket."

But.

OSHA - Where the hell was OSHA? Talk about your sexual harassment, and "creating a hostile workplace" - golly, I can't think of a more graphic way to detect that the workplace feels hostile that seeing a supervisor get beat up.

I work part time selling popcorn at the local movies. We get the "no sexual comments, touching", "report to your supervisor, or HR, or the company president if that makes you feel more comfortable". So - what the hell is TSA doing, that every swinging . . er . . "one" of them, didn't report the incident, immediately, to their Union Rep (who was probably giggling along), to HR, or to Oprah?

Why didn't the trainee know, by the time they are demonstrating detection equipment, the law that forbids making fun (that is, bullying) people at work? Why weren't the procedures posted, and read to, each and everyone present, from the supervisor/trainer on down?

Why doesn't the story include how the supervisor was reprimanded, chastised, fined, laid off, fired, or sent home without pay for a week or ten, for the initial comment, regardless of what followed in the parking lot? Why doesn't the story include an apology from SEIU, TSA, and B. Hussein Obama - to the trainee, that is, not the supervisor.

Why hasn't the supervisor's boss been identified, and received disciplinary action, for letting discrimination and derogatory interactions become part of the "normal" workday?

Why did the trainee think that he was the only one ever harassed at work, and that TSA/SEIU and OSHA have provided ways to respond, that don't risk jail time?

And the part of this that really gets to me is this. Do all disgruntled TSA trainees carry police-type night sticks? And know more about how to use them than their supervisor?

Other than possible possession questions, I imagine that taking this dude to court will actually be a "federal case".