Thursday, April 05, 2012

News from the dark side of the moon...

Any of y'all ever watched Current TV? That's Al Gore's network for people who are fed up with the pervasive right-wing bias of MSNBC, for those of you who weren't aware of its existence.

If you weren't aware of it, don't feel bad, because according to the ratings, neither was anybody else. I mean, it's been on the air since 2005, and I never even noticed it 'til a year ago or so. The star poodle of their prime-time act, the recently-fired Keith Olbermann, had viewership numbers that could easily be equalled if every man, woman, and child in Salem, Oregon watched their local public-access channel to see the Cherry Queen crowned at the State Fair.

More people were listening to late-night entertainer George Noory warning them about reptiloid aliens than were listening to prime-time Authorized Journalist Olbermann warning them about Republican congressmen. That's gotta suck. If he wasn't such a thoroughly unlikeable person, you'd almost feel sorry for him.

Speaking of thoroughly unlikeable douchebags, have you heard about what happened when Keith was actually expected to ride in the same car as one of the 99%? This guy was such a colossal douchebag that the only guy they could find to fill his spot in the lineup was Eliot frickin' Spitzer.

Think about that: If the only person on the planet douchier than you was a politician who had been hounded from office, basically for excessive douchiness, it'd be time to sit in the garage with the car running and the door closed and have a long talk with yourself. Of course, Olbermann probably owns a frickin' Nissan Leaf or something, so he won't be able to do the right thing.

20 comments:

RWC said...

How can you not like the guy?

“One time it was that the drivers talked to him, he did not like that the driver saw fit to speak to him."

That was just one of the limo drivers out of eight that Obie ran through during his time at Current.

Josh Kruschke said...

I'd bet money more people will read this post than watched his show last year.

SGB said...

He's the king douche.

Fuzzy Curmudgeon said...

Josh -- that's a sucker bet.

TBeck said...

It's Bush's fault!

Bubblehead Les. said...

This is what, his 5th or 6th Network Job he's been Fired from? The question that must be asked, is why he kept getting Hired? He better hope that his 1% of all the Wealth keeps him in Cheesie Poofs, because at this stage, Reptiliod Aliens probably wouldn't want him.

Anonymous said...

I concur with everybody bere. Tam and Bobbi probably get more views than Olbermoron any day of the week. Of course, it helps that our stalwarts make SENSE when they dish the snark...keep it up, guys. JohninMd(help)

Panamared said...

Now now Tam, it is much more fitting that he live to be a bitter old man, howling at the moon, because no one will listen to his rants.

RWC said...

Wonder how much he is going to get from his 5 year $50 million contract.

Ken O said...

Speaking of poor judgement and extreme douchebaggery, did you see who Gore's partner in this venture is? I mean, Tom Hanks did make a movie about just how much Hyatt blows syphilitic dromedary. And these are the same ass pimples that just expect the gay vote, the black vote and the Latino vote to fall in their laps- unfrickinbelievable.

joated said...

There were probably more people at an Ohio State football game last fall than watched K.O. on Current.

Drang said...

I'm not sure I'd even heard of Current TV until Olbermen got fired from it.

Anonymous said...

Spitzer is moving up, from Client#9 to Chandelier#2

Anonymous said...

I knew of Current TV through the Rotten Tomato movie review show, which I watched on HULU. The show was suddenly canceled in 2010 and I hadn't heard of Current again until just now.

Anonymous said...

Cable Access Channel 53 in Bowling Green, KY has a slot open for a 2:00 am show Obie. Send them your resume but you'll need to drive yourself to work big guy!

Gerry

Mark Alger said...

Hell, joated;

There were probably more people at a Cincinnati State football game than watched Olber-the-topman on Current.

Does Cincinnati State even HAVE a football team? I'm not really sure.

M

Anonymous said...

Panamared - that's all the necessary qualifications for Obie to take over for Letterman...

Pm

Anonymous said...

I used to scan Current for the Lucy Liu? Lisa Ling? Laura Ling docs. Some of them were pretty good. Some were lame. I liked the meth one from Ohio and the Uighurs in China

Pathfinder said...

FTA: "Meanwhile, Olbermann’s Current TV replacement, disgraced former New York Gov. Eliot Spitzer, drew miserable ratings in his debut last Friday."

This is my shocked face. No, really, I am shocked!!

Crowndot said...

Just need to let you know I am SO disappointed this post was not about IRON SKY!