A teenager has killed eight people and wounded five others in a knife attack in China's Liaoning province, state media says.If only the Chinese had civilised knives*.
Remember, kids: When murder is outlawed, only outlaws will murder!
*How long before Britons are reduced to using yarn scissors, wearing helmets to bed, and eating paste for entertainment? How quickly H.G. Wells' prophecies have come true: A race of globe-conquering merchant warriors reduced to a tame herd of soft, toothless Eloi in the span of a single human lifetime, with the exception of a small Morlock undercaste left to man the Forces and patrol the streets and wonder what has happened to their Sceptred Isle.