Friday, May 19, 2006

Bored legislators make goofy laws...

I am of the age where being carded for alcohol purchases is usually more a source of joy than frustration. A carding at the convenience store could provide grist for my conversational mill for a day or two: "Hey, y'all, you won't believe this, but they carded me for beer at the Weigel's the other day!"

The local .gov recently took that simple joy away from me by requiring all retailers to card for all alcohol purchases. It kinda takes the compliment out of the carding when they ask the octogenerian in line behind you for ID, too. Now it seems they want to make sure I can't get complimented statewide.

This is the kind of stuff that happens when you pay folks to sit around and think up laws. The old ad campaign slogan "It's not just a good idea; it's the law," has morphed into "It's a good idea, therefore it should be a law."

Here are some future ideas for our liege lords in Nashville (since they've already done seatbelts and drinking ages and suchlike):

  • Not wearing a sweater when it's really cold outside: Class A misdemeanor.
  • Running with scissors: Class C misdemeanor.
  • Putting something in your mouth when you don't know where it's been: Class B misdemeanor.
  • Not listening to your mother: Class E felony.


Paul said...

My favorites are the the Click It or Ticket (Wait, was that slogan here or Arkansas?) where the cops say, "We've told you time and time again to use your safety belts, but you just don't listen, so now we're going to start giving tickets."

Why, thank you, officer! You know, it's a good thing there aren't REAL criminals on the street, or this would be a waste of time in addition to being an encroachment on my freedom, wouldn't it?

I wear my seat belt every time I get into a vehicle, but these commercials just make me want to live dangerously, just because I can. Who the heck do they think they are?

Anonymous said...

I'll be 42 in a week and a half. I got carded the other day. Here in Oregon a few months back the lady who runs the OLCC (Oregon Liquor Control Commisson) got busted for drunk driving. She got off. We the sheeple still get harassed though.

Isn't "freedom" grand?

Anonymous said...

Somehow I keep hearing Stallone going "It's Da Law".

Anonymous said...

If someone proposed to require proof of legal residency in the US of A before they could wire money out of the country, the protesters would be rioting in the streets.

Who is disgusted.

Paul said...

My mistake: The slogan is, "Buckle Up In Your Truck."

Which is stupid, anyway. I drive a 97 Sable. Do I have to buckle up?

Anonymous said...

Are you trying to tell me a man ain't allowed to make his own whisky?

Anonymous said...

Ya ain't been allowed to do that since 19 hundred and 23. However as of 1978 you are once again allowed to make your own beer and wine.

Really wish the people in our government would stop trying to tell me what to do or not do.

Our country made a lot of wonderful leaps before all this safety regulation. Sadly we are quickly approaching the point where what is not specifically authorized is verboten.