Thursday, March 10, 2011

Chump change.

With talk of replacing the $1 bill with a $1 coin circulating again, I find myself wondering what the impact will be on the... er... "exotic dancing" industry.

Are shoe models going to need to wear some kind of special coin receptacle? Is this not really about the money at all, but rather some kind of sneak flank attack from the Legion of Decency?
.

38 comments:

Anonymous said...

thigh mounted credit card readers.

-SayUncle

Tam said...

That'd make typing in the PIN hard on debit card users, at least if it was a fast-paced dance number...

Joseph said...

Coin slot, duh!

Seriously, they'll sell "bills" at the door for patrons to tuck. And no, I've given this no thought at all.

Skip said...

The last time I went to such an establishment, several years ago for a bachelor party, drinks bought with cash had their change returned in $2 bills, under the theory that most of them would go to later tips, i guess.

og said...

Some higher end places have already replaced greenbacks with "funny money" that the club can control, it's no different from using chips at vegas. You buy an amount when you come in, and the girls know they're not having "contaminated" cash (dollars are hideously filthy)jammed near to their... persons. The "funny money" can be cashed in at the end of the evening, if you have any left.





Or so I'm told.

theirritablearchitect said...

I was once the recipient of a story from a somewhat older co-worker about 20 years ago.

He was in the Navy for some time and was stationed in the Philippines at one point. He had a story about what the local dancing girls did with the local currency, a Peso, I think, and there was a term for what they did with a stack of those coins.

I believe he called it "squinting."

Nothing left for me to say.

North said...

When I dance I get nothing lower than a $10.




*heh*




*cough*

Ferret said...

With all of the recent hand-wringing about how the current U.S. coinage is worth less than the metals from which it's made, what will the new coins be made of? It would have to be something so cheap and abundant as to never be worth more than its denomination. Plastic? Carbon fiber? Depleted uranium? Campaign promises, maybe?

The Raving Prophet said...

It's the penny that is worth less than the cost to make it. "Melt value" of the penny is actually lower than a penny (read that someplace else this morning).

IMO, if it will save that much money, well, dollar bill, it's been fun, but don't let the door hit you in the rear on the way out. Ditto for ditching or redesigning the penny.

If we're going to be scrutinizing the budget, I know this isn't why the US is broke, but we need to grab savings wherever we can. In this case, it's the kind of thing that causes no real issues.

Anonymous said...

I don't want the coins! Aussies use $1 and $2 coins and after a bit of shopping your change pocket ends up weighing a bunch and bulging worse than a 14 year old boy at one of those establishments mentioned (of which my client has no knowledge)

Ken said...

Did you take a good look at the engraving on the recent Washington dollar coin and the new Jefferson nickel? They aren't spending any money there, either -- they look like Chuck E. Cheese tokens.

Actually, there's a lesson buried in there. Who hath ears, let him use a Q-Tip.

USCitizen said...

"Shoe Models"

Heh.

It's phrases like that that make it a required daily visit to Tam's place.

Anonymous said...

>thigh mounted credit card readers.

Naw, that's what the RFID credit cards are for. Probably mount them on the ass.

I've _always_ said I prefer the contact smart cards where you have to put card "A" into slot "B" and no one can sniff the packets out of the ether. I'll let someone else make the strip club joke here.

>It's the penny that is worth less than the cost to make it.

Both the penny _and_ nickel. I think it's time to make the dime the lowest unit of currency.

Also, can the government figure the fuck out that no one, I mean no one wants the goddam Carter Quarter? Even if you make it look gold-ish, or has Sacajawea or Jefferson on the obverse?

If you want to see inflation destroy the value of money, check out India, where a _steel_ 1-rupee coin is worth more melted down and made into razor blades.

-SM

Jake (formerly Riposte3) said...

"what will the new coins be made of? It would have to be something so cheap and abundant as to never be worth more than its denomination. Plastic?"

Now that gave me an idea. How about sapphire glass or transparent aluminum with an embedded hologram instead of engraving?

Something like that would be light, durable, and difficult to counterfeit. Size it so it's slightly but noticeably larger than a quarter, and it might be useful.

Sigivald said...

Here in Oregon, strip club capital of the country, it's illegal to touch the "dancers" anyway.

So tips get left on the bar in front of them.

So, zero impact here.

og said...

"Both the penny _and_ nickel."

The nickel is still worth more as a metal than the face value. Some people suggest saving ammo cans full of them.

Joanna said...

I got a Lincoln dollar coin in my Christmas stocking this year (Why? I have no earthly idea. My dad has a thing for coins.) and it immediately struck me as looking like a commemorative something-or-other. The portrait is straight-on facing you, so it takes a second to register "Oh yeah, Abe." They use profiles for a reason, and changing that (no pun intended) smacks of adolescent reasoning in the design process. There's usually a reason things have always been the way they are.

All that to say that I doubt replacing bills entirely will catch on well, if at all.

Stretch said...

Clear plastic platform shoes with coin slots. Think piggy banks for your feet.
Um, am I giving this too much thought?

Wabprepper said...

In Canada, it works fine... The dancers play games, where you throw the coins, (loonies and toonies) and hit certain target areas to get posters, magnets, and keychains as prizes...

Although it also creates other opportunities for devilry and hayhem... Keep the coins under your cold, ice filled glass.... then throw.

Or are a masogonist with a death wish, heat the coin with your lighter. And be guaranteed a solid beating from the bouncer.

d said...

The dollar has been a coin amount for a long time.

Perhaps back when a nickel bought you something a dollar was worth pulling out your wallet for, but inflation has ended those days.

Add in that the Constitution authorized a mint to make coinage but not a FR to make paper currency and the dollar coin makes more sense.
(and no, I'm not a fan of the design, but the SBA, Sacajawea, and presidential coins are all locked into the same size and approximate weight by the vendo industry at this point)

Anonymous said...

Consider the size of the old Silver dollar. That was about an ounce.

Now consider the same weight in gold, (it would be smaller). That would be 1400 Dollars.

A roll of once ounce gold coins would buy a pretty fair car. A few rolls would buy a house.

Every once in a while I re- read "Probability Broach" just to keep in touch with alternatives.

loren said...

Here in Oz the 1 and 2 dollar coins work just fine and a hell of a lot better than a fist full of almost worthless US paper dollar notes. On the other hand the Aussie larger denomination notes really suck. They're plastic and slip, slide and refuse to stay folded.
PS - a few years ago the OZ dollar was worth 49 cents US. Now it's over a buck. Guess where it'll be after Obama?

Mike said...

Why does the GAO hate single mothers?

Roberta X said...

Gah. I always hated it when they threw nickels. Dang, those things sting.

WV: "cherme" I am so not even getting near that.

Anonymous said...

Uncle had it about right.

In a world where my late-twenties professional son makes two dollar purchases at Circle K with plastic, currency regardless of form is increasingly irrelevant...

Unless the good folks at survivalblog are right in which case a couple quarters from your stash will get you a brewski and a lap dance. ZOMGWAGD! Well, yeah, you're still gonna die but at least you'll die happy.

Also, why am I thinking that any guy who flings nickel at 'berta is likely to get lead flung in return?

AT

Anonymous said...

I can't really add anything, but a captcha reading "mating" seems too apropos to pass up!

Ok, I'll say this: 1 and 2 dollar coins are handy for vending machines on account of their being somewhat more resistant to becoming dog-eared.

Jim

Brad K. said...

Tam,

I would think that dropping the $1 bill would be part of the intent to skip to $5 bills for general commerce - a candy bar, a can of beans, a loaf of bread.

As for the shoe models, I 'spose they could just install card-swipers like at Wal-Mart, put one every ten feed around the . . ahem, 'shoe modeling area' . . that lights a light and dings a bell every time someone contributes from . . uh, admiration. For the shoes. Sheesh.

Besides, with the cards you tie in the bank records that the IRS now has access to, which makes the . . shoe models . . appear to be reporting their income accurately. Which they would have been doing anyway, of course.

If nothing else, shoe model venues could just sell $1 or $1.15 or $0.86 'tokens' that look and act like dollar bills. For the shoe exhibition event. Sheesh.

Gewehr98 said...

Saw a "model" in Okinawa that could do amazing things with a stack of coins.

I didn't want them back after she was done with them, though...

Anonymous said...

I agree with US Citizen...

It's phrases like "shoe model" and all the other word-smithing that Tam does that makes her blog a required daily read...

Thanks Tam!

Guffaw in AZ said...

I was reading the earlier post responses, and musing about 'possibilities', e.g. swiping a debit card, keying in a PIN...if one hits the wrong button, do they get a prize?

wolfwalker said...

from way up above: IMO, if it will save that much money, well, dollar bill, it's been fun, but don't let the door hit you in the rear on the way out

It would. Actually I thought about this at lunch today. I got $1.05 back in change when I paid. The dollar bill was 'slightly used' and probably about six months old. The nickel was dated 1980. Thirty-one years old.

I regularly get eagleback quarters in change, even though none of them have been made in twelve years. Couple months ago I found a bicentennial quarter in my pocket. I still occasionally see 'wheat' design pennies -- and those haven't been made in over sixty years!

But bills? Feh. 18 months is about the best you can get.

If our government had any brains with its marketing, we'd all already be using dollar coins. But they don't. They've tried to 'launch' dollar coins three times that I can remember, and three times it's been a dismal failure.

global village idiot said...

In my vulgar, misspent youth I used to exclusively carry $2 bills and Susan B. Anthony dollars, just to be a prick.

I was in a mall in El Paso (was stationed at Ft Bliss at the time) and paid for a $2.75 meal at an oriental fast-food place with three SBAs.

Ganesha be praised, the Manager called security on me.

I'm NOT making this up!

rickn8or said...

My line of work. And yes U.S. currency of all denominations is filthy; I use hand sanitizer like Ted the Swimmer used scotch.

But dollar coins have been a tremendous flop the last couple-three times they've been issued. And bags of coins of any denomination are a real PITA to any bank teller.

Sure would generate some work in the cash-handling equipment industry, what with changing all those cash drawer inserts, coin and bill acceptors, etc.

But perhaps TPTB should wait until they get the Next Generation $100 bill right and distributed before dealing with the other end of the denomination spectrum.

stranger said...

If dollar coins come back the same old solutions will come back. Tip cans, tip jars, or just passing the hat after a performance.

Stranger

Stuart the Viking said...

It's not cellulite... it's dents from all the dollar coins...

s

WV: imasult. The wv thing must be dislexic, it should read imaslut.

Inbredredneck said...

If the penny needs to go away, why do so many of my customers make such a big deal of it when stamps go up by one cent?

Rob J

Anonymous said...

I have a vision of Glenn Quagmire swiping his credit card down a dancer's... ahem.

ASM826 said...

You should not have thought of this. I remember Piso shows in the Philippines, and the Legion of Decency would not approve.

They got to keep all they could hold, if you're understanding what I mean. Do not google. Resist the curiosity.