Okay, listen up. You citizens of Atlanta, Chicago, NYC, Seattle, Portland, LA, Austin, SF, and Philly, you can go now. No, you Bostonians sit back down; this is for you.
You there, the hippie from San Fran. Shut the door on your way out, okay?
Alright, Bostonians, what the hell is wrong with you people? Have your vertebrae atrophied so much that they can no longer support your brains atop your spinal columns? Have you devolved into a panicky herd of grazing creatures, easily spooked by blinky lights or sudden movements? I mean, for gawd's sake people, everybody else in the country looked at those little devices and said "Wow, a viral marketing gimmick." You all, on the other hand, freaked and called the cops. Who then shut your whole damned city down to save you from a blinking cartoon menace. You should be ashamed.
If Paul Revere were to get his warning in today's Boston, the lot of you would be on your cellies summoning the bomb squad to the Old North Church. Robert Newman and the lantern manufacturer would be forced to settle out of court and make a groveling public apology to the Mayor and his flock, and the Redcoats would have laughed themselves to death instead of getting shot up like they did. Look, here's a couple of flash cards for you to carry around to cut down on this sort of embarrasment in the future, okay?
This is a bomb:
This is an advertising gimmick:
See the differences? The ad gimmick is the one out in the open with the blinky lights. The bomb is the one that is hidden so that Jack Bauer needs a whole TV season to find it. Got it? Good.
Don't get 'em mixed up again.