Saturday, January 03, 2009

Overheard on the phone...

Shootin' Buddy: "So, you want to see Valkyrie?"

Me: "Duh! Machine guns and dead Nazis?"


People are whining about the plot. People are whining about the lead actor. People are whining about how it's kinda hard to make a suspenseful thriller when everyone already knows the ending.

Me? As far as I'm concerned, enough machine guns and dead Nazis will cover for nearly any movie-making sin. I can't think of a single movie, from It's A Wonderful Life to Mary Poppins, that wouldn't be improved by a whole bunch of machine guns and dead Nazis. (And with the release of Defiance, I'll be able to get a double dose this month!)

39 comments:

og said...

Needsa few zombies and killer rabbits with laser eyes and I'm there. otherwise I'll wait for DVD.

Turk Turon said...

I used to watch WWII movies on TV with my mom. Whenever there were Nazis she would tear up and shout at the screen, BASTARDS! BASTARDS!"
I've never seen her get so furious about anything. She' from Fredericksburg, VA and so of those little towns (Bedford is not far away) lost a lot of young men in the war, including a lot of boys in her high school class.
So yeah, any time I can see Nazis being killed by the "bushel basket" (Patton?) I'm happy.

Anonymous said...

""I can't think of a single movie, from It's A Wonderful Life to Mary Poppins, that wouldn't be improved by a whole bunch of machine guns and dead Nazis""

Classic.

J-t-R

Stan in MN said...

Defiance seems to have quite a few Mosin Nagant rifles and Nagant pistols. Haven't seen many of them since Enemy at the Gate.

Malamute said...

Wow, a girl thats gets what makes a movie good! Way to go Tam!


BTW, if you still have that VHS copy of Way of the Gun you were trying to give away, I've never seen it, and I still have a VHS machine,...just in case there happened to be anything coming in the mail from Indy to Wyoming and there was some extra room in the envelope,...


Malamute

the pawnbroker said...

btw..."it's a wonderful life"? i think the nazis and machine guns were there; remember baby brother harry's exploits? just took a little mind's eye imagination is all...

spoiler alert:

yeah, i know, you prefer graphics, but you're gonna be pissed at who doesn't get ripped up in valkyrie (i thought it was gonna be a motorcycle flick).

jtc

Adrian K said...

There's motorcycles in it? O dang. I might just have to get over my Tom Cruise aversion.

Oh.

nevermind....

Bad pun. You must be punished.

WV: blect

I think Blogger agrees with my opinion of your pun. =p

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Tam said...

Normally I delete spam posts, but I'm willing to make the occasional exception.

Congrats. ;)

Joseph said...

Hmmm...."It's a Wonderful Life" with machine guns and dead Nazis....yeah, could be done. And with "A Christmas Story" as well...;)

Gewehr98 said...

Tam,

Hopefully you or Roberta are home. UPS said package required adult signature on Friday, and they will attempt another delivery...

Heath said...

So... Valkyrie is safe to blow 30 bucks seeing in theatre?

Tam said...

G98,

Yup, found the note when I got back from the Land of Orange last night.

I will be sitting on the porch when the UPS guy gets here on Monday. :)

The Freeholder said...

Hm-m-m...The Ten Commandments with machine guns and dead Nazis...

(And the comment word verification ws "duckbult". Close, ever so close. :-) )

Farmer Frank said...

I don't know. When I saw it the other day I think I would have liked it better if there had been some ACTING in it by the lead so-and-so.

For my money it was a 'one-timer' only and it would have been better served on something I already paid for like the dish.

All The Best,
Frank W. James

alath said...

I can't wait to see your reviews of Defiance and Valkyrie Tam.

One of my favorite recurring musings is "What WWII event/campaign/battle would make a good movie that hasn't been made yet?"

Lately I have been thinking that the Night Witches - Soviet women flying around at night in obsolete wooden biplanes dropping stuff on Nazis - could be a good movie.

Also, I think there've got to be more movies to be had out of the South Pacific campaign. Airplanes, battleships, Marines... what's not to like? Something about Joe Foss and the Cactus Air Force, perhaps.

Crucis said...

How about making a movie of W. E. B. Griffin's "The Corps" series?

Remember the brother, Machine Gun McCoy? Of course those were BARs.

Ed Foster said...

We still had a few BARs in the armory when I was at Twenty-Nine Palms. I don't know why the American BARs didn't have the quick change barrel like the Belgian made ones. But still one savagely serious piece of ordinance.

We had lots of magazines, and plenty of linked M2 ball and tracer to break down and play with. until the incident. Oops.

Still, some day I'm going to get me one of those in semi auto. And how about a mini-series on Guadalcanal?

unix-jedi said...

Ed:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Pacific_(miniseries)

unix-jedi said...

And once more with html encoding:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Pacific_(miniseries)

Mister Snitch! said...

Funny you mention Mary Poppins. What made Julie Andrews' 'Sound of Music' so special? Yup. Nazis.

richard mcenroe said...

"Cross of Iron?"

Had lots of dead Nazis and machine guns... but it was Commies killin' 'em...

smacklin said...

""I can't think of a single movie, from It's A Wonderful Life to Mary Poppins, that wouldn't be improved by a whole bunch of machine guns and dead Nazis""

Actually It's A Wonderful Life kind of implied machine guns and not only dead Germans but Japanese Kamakizi pilots as well.

But it would have been better with more.

ljc said...

Some time there should be a musical "conspiritors' trial" movie with a funny scene of Judge Freisler yelling Schweinhund at some German general on trial, just as an RAF bomb comes through the ceiling and sends the Judge to his reward. It happened.

Dave Hardy said...

Sound of Music, except that Julie Andrews covers their retreat with a Browning 1917 watercooled. She has to change position several times because the Nazi bodies are blocking her field of fire. At last she runs out of ammo, and all seems lost ... until the Old Nuns nail them from behind with deadly yardsticks. Since Old Nuns cannot be stopped by conventional weapons, they massacre the remaining SS brigade in minutes, leaving only one survivor so he can go back and warn anyone else about messing with Old Nuns.

Yes, they could make a movie about Joe Foss, but nobody would believe it. Actually, Joe told me they did, sorta. "Flying Leathernecks." They told him about it and offered him BIG bucks, probably 20 years pay as a Marine officer. He told them the story wasn't authentic, a bunch of that stuff didn't happen, the love interest was BS, and he wouldn't take their money, he wasn't gonna sell his soul.

That's what I mean, that nobody would believe his real story.

Anonymous said...

There is always "Bedknobs and Broomsticks" in which a bunch of Nazis get beaten up by suits of armor animated by Angela Lansbury. Machine guns and Nazis, though the Nazis live.

Brian said...

"Cross of Iron?"

Had lots of dead Nazis and machine guns... but it was Commies killin' 'em..


Yeah,, but look on the bright side. I'm sure some of the Commies got killed along with the Nazis, so it couldn't be all bad.

CastoCreations said...

Classic! And I totally agree. :) I can't stand Tom Cruise but I will watch the movie when it comes out on video. Although I'm pretty sure the documentaries (there are several on the history channel that I've seen) are more interesting. =)

Mark@Sea said...

Tam. Roberta.

Adult signature?

(sorry, Tam. Easy shot, I had to take it ;) )

Anonymous said...

"...Julie Andrews covers their retreat with a Browning 1917 watercooled...."

A Spandau Maxim, I think. Or better yet, a Schwarzlose M.07/12!

Cossack in a Kilt said...

Kursk.

World needs a really good movie about big tank engagements, and let's face it, Sandbox I was just too much of a turkey shoot.

W said...

I agree; you can't shoot enough NAZIs, but they have been sooo done. Valkyrie is worth seeing for the supporting acting and the tension of the story. I had to explain to my wife that, like the Titanic, this movie is a foregone conclusion. God love her, she's a fine pistol and rifle shot, but not a history buff. Tom Cruise (couch jumping not withstanding) "sheppards" the movie well enough, but the supporting cast is pretty good.

Now, in a vain attempt to hijack this blog's steering wheel, let me propose the following movies that will NEVER be made by our patriotic, truth-searching friends in Hollywood (insert Oliver Stone, et al, here)
MOVIES:
1. "The War of the Rose Law Firm Billing Records"

2. "The Meaning of "IS": How Bill Clinton Changed The English Language"

3. "It's a Wonderful Life: The Real Story of the Community Reinvestment Act"

4. "Charlie Rangel's War: How One Congressman Fought Paying Taxes"

Other topics for consideration and development:
1. How FDR used his genius to trick the Japanese into attacking the US, thus ending the depression. Sheer economic genius!

2. How FDR gave us a wonderful "investment" plan that will fail under it's own weight that will...uh...wait a minute. This could be also be the Bernie Maddow movie.

3. How about an "Uncle" Joe and FDR buddy movie? We could focus on how the Soviets penetrated FDR's government like a fraternity boy with his freshman date at a pledge party!

I could go on and on and on, but I'll let someone else have some fun with this idea;-)


W

Pohjanakka said...

Simo Häyhä's story as a big budget movie?

Renny Harlin is trying to make a movie about C.G. Mannerheim, which would include our civil war, the winter war and the continuation war. He's at best an average director, but it might be interesting to see anyway.

Anonymous said...

"Hm-m-m...The Ten Commandments with machine guns and dead Nazis..."

It's called Raiders of the Lost Ark.

Ben said...

I get this very vivid image of Jimmy Stewart running down the street in the snow only this time it's not "Merry Christmas, movie house!" but "Merry Christmas, shouted curse of your choice!" and a Thompson in his hand to punctuate the sentiment to a batch of Nazis.

FatWhiteMan said...

Actually, It's A Wonderful Life had a boatload of dead Nazis. Jimmy Stewart's little brother he saved from the ice went on to get a medal by machine gunning Nazis from his airplane to save allied sailors.

As far as Valkyrie, I can watch any movie where Tom Cruise is stood up and shot over and over again.

staghounds said...

Have none of you ever actually SEEN "It's a Wonderful Life"???

Harry shot down a JAPANESE airplane that was about to crash into a troop transport, there is actual footage of full auto tracer fire.

Bert and Ernie fought in the ETO, winning the Silver Star in one case and helping capture the Remagen Bridge in the other. Dead Nazis guaranteed.

Sheesh.

staghounds said...

Oops, meant to write Marty, not Ernie.

Turk Turon said...

Bert and Ernie were in the Big Bird Battalion, weren't they?