Thursday, July 29, 2010

Overheard in the Hallway:

Coming from the bathroom:

RX: "I decided to get clever and light a match, you know, to help out the air freshener. Now it smells like I set a bouquet of flowers on fire in an outhouse."

Me: "I'm sorry, but I have to put that on the internets."

12 comments:

og said...

And I'm told I overshare.

WV oufful. That air freshener smells oufful

Mr.B said...

thanks....

Coffee all over a keyboard.

Weer'd Beard said...

Hehehe, As a friend says "Now the bathroom smells like flowers and shit!"

DirtCrashr said...

No bathroom fan? I'm upgrading ours from 50cffm to 110. And it will be quieter.

Steve Skubinna said...

You know, without a control experiment this is just an unproven hypothesis. You're gonna have to set fire to an outhouse.

Lergnom said...

We live in an old house, so we have a full sized window. The only downside was that we used to have a cat who insisted on using the window for entry and exit during temperate weather.

rickn8or said...

DirtCrashr--

Some of us shy types LIKE noisy exhaust fans...

Tam said...

Roseholme Cottage has a badass exhaust fan, but physics has its limit. :o

Will Brown said...

I for one cannot wait for this goes on the internets tit-for-tat to escalate to the HD low-light video level of exchange.

An opt-in option for the full SenseAround effect would be nice.

John said...

I have started a fire in an old outhouse, while I was a guest on farm that abuts one of Ohio's few year-round trout streams. It happened when I lit a twist of newspaper to run flame around the insides and under the edge of the seat hole in the plank. It's pro-forma for clearing out black widows and brown recluse spiders when using an old outhouse that sees only occasional use.

As I learned it, a bite by one of them on y'r tender-bits, whether dangly-style or not, can have deadly serious health consequences. At the least, the bite-ee is in for an unpleasant time of it.

However, this particular house o'drops, not only was seldom used, but it had a shallow pit that was seldom dredged out. Natcherly, there was abundant dried-out paper products.

As the flames started to catch, under my horrified downward gaze, all I could think of was "How am I going to explain this one?" -- until in desperation I hoped that the earlier beer intake was going to be equal to the outgoing task.

And that's how I know what the burning contents of an outhouse smell like. Learning over that seat-hole and aiming for all I was worth involved quite a bit of pungent smoke in the face.

There's not an advertised product of which I'm aware that will really turn that into a happy floral scented TV commercial. At least I didn't have to explain it to my hosts and the local VFD , tho' for a moment there, I was going to claim spontaneous combustion was to blame.

Anyway, for my money, there is no better place to relieve those needs than in a pristine outdoor squat, whilst overlooking something scenic, with a fair breeze -- far away from my fellow humans.

Just remember to tie the dog to a tree at a bit of distance, before you do. Otherwise, you'll not be wanting to share any doggie licks real soon.

Brad K. said...

Tam,

I am so thankful that the smell didn't include burnt paint or burnt flooring.

Or burnt hair.

An enterprising young athlete in my sister's High School class, trying for the Green Flare, achieved an inordinately painful, yet surprisingly inconspicuous, burn.

Carl H said...

"Roseholme Cottage has a badass exhaust fan"

Is that a badass exhaust fan, or a bad ass exhaust fan?