RX: "Would you like a bagel?"
Me: "Yes, please! Although you didn't get any cream cheese..."
Me: "How are you supposed to eat a bagel without cream cheese?"
RX: "Why don't you just put some mayonnaise on it?"
Me: "What?!? They don't taste anything alike!"
RX: "They're both unpleasant-tasting white substances."
I guess this is payback for my comments about rice and legumes.