Columnist DeWayne Wickham says that if Barry Bonds' record gets an asterisk, then everyone that played before baseball was integrated should get asterisks too.
Really, DeWayne?
You mean that Babe Ruth secretly and against the rules of baseball, for his own personal aggrandizement and benefit, kept black players out of the sport in order to better his numbers? Is that what you're saying?
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But Babe Ruth was black!
How about a whole galaxy of asterisks, then, for Fleetwood Walker, bare-hands catcher, and team captain of the world's-champion 1884 Toledo Blue Stockings, who played his whole career before baseball went Jim Crow.
And how about Cadillac, naming that car after him?
A lot of Goody Two-Shoes want eternal credit for ending segregation, when in fact it was their own "social hygiene" forbears who created it. Baseball was only segregated for 58 years. (Now, go ask a Georgian about slavery!)
Won't we also need asterisks for players who never faced Japanese competition?
I reckon Of Wayne doesn't subscribe to the "look at his nose, Babe Ruth was black!" theory...which, in itself was happy to grab hold of a stereotype and ride it like a sorority girl. Good thing Babe came before dyeing hair blonde was common...
I realized a long time ago the people constantly screaming or otherwise insinuating 'racism' or 'sexism' from behind the curtain of 'equality' want no such thing.
Actually, you could question Ruth's place in the modern record books, but for the simple reason that a couple of key rules were different back then:
1-ANY ball that left the park in fair territory was a home run-including what today are called ground rule doubles. But you'd have to peruse old newspaper stories from 714 games to figure out exactly how many of these there were.
2-the so-called 'Babe Ruth Rule' - limits teams to altering the dimensions of their ballpark only once per season. Instituted because teams would move the fences in when Ruth's team came to town, so the fans had a better chance to see him hit a homer, then move them back when Ruth left. Again, you could almost write a dissertation figuring out how many of Ruth's homers were due to this.
ride it...sorority girl.
I'm dying here.
Yeah, and we'll have to asterisk everyone who played before cyborgs were admitted to the sport, to. And don't get me stated on what happens after we recruit the first Freendinks from Gargulon IV...
Actually, I'm guessing Wickham is one of these embittered prunes who furiously deny that anything good ever happened in America before his socially enlightened consciousness arrived on scene.
He probably spent Thanksgiving wearing black and mourning. Tough patooties - don't expect, let alone demand, that anyone else share your wallowing in self loathing.
Baseball is nothing more than an excuse to drink beer.
And a poor one, at that.
Most days, most ways, you are right, geek. Is it also an excuse to take steroids, though?
Or to drink beer in the exclusive company of only a legally-defined percentage of the citizenry?
See, they've got these sharp-edged asterisks flying around now, and that alone is a threat to public safety...
Yawn.
I'm not real excited over someone on steroids who's achieved some sports record or other.
But then, I'm not real excited over someone who's not on steroids who's achieved some sports record or other.
We could fit track stars with rockets up their butts and see who would be the fastest for all I care.
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