Thursday, April 28, 2011

But I don't even like long pig!

Because I own guns, it generally is assumed by a certain (thankfully demographically impotent) subset of the population that I'm an illiterate hillbilly; a Jew-fearin', woman-hatin' (?), gay-bashin', Negro-lynchin', people-who-talk-funny-mistrustin' yahoo.

But a cannibal?

That's a new one on me.

What do you call it when you're so afraid that somebody might be a bigot that you concoct a sort of Protocols of the Elders of Macon view of them?

30 comments:

Joan of Argghh! said...

*snerk!*

That's perfect.

og said...

I've eaten a boatload of raw fish, raw deer meat on more than one occasion, squirrel, turkey, gator, croc, rattler, wild bear, groundhog, horse, hartebeest, impala, kudu, catfish, alligator gar, hell, critters of all designations.

I wouldn't touch an armadillo, or a possum, or a raccoon, or a dump bear, or a liberal, or any other creature that lives off others like that. It's unsanitary.

Bubblehead Les. said...

Cannibalism? That's Crazy! Why would I want to contaminate myself by eating one of them? You know what kind of Diseases those people carry around with them?

Roberta X said...

"No snacking, you'll ruin your appetite. You know we're having the Smiths for dinner."

(WV: "protoo")

RobertM said...

I didn't realize selling people out to the Nazis made you a Holocaust survivor. I always thought it made you a collaborator.

Joseph said...

If we are gonna go cannibal, I like the "Protocols of the Elders of Bacon" better.

BobG said...

"What do you call it when you're so afraid that somebody might be a bigot that you concoct a sort of Protocols of the Elders of Macon view of them?"

The term "dumbass" comes to mind.

TBeck said...

So THAT'S what they mean when they talk about "the other white meat"!

Borepatch said...

Protocols of the Elders of Macon

Snorted coffee on that one. Ouch.

Unknown.Rodent said...

To quote Jayne :

http://www.moviesoundclips.net/movies1/serenity/fun.wav

Ken said...

Joseph beat me to it, durn it all.

.45ACP+P said...

Under the auspicies of "You are What You Eat"........ not only "NO" but "HELL NO". Not in anyway worth the risk of turning liberal.

Don M said...

When things get really really bad, Get up and go to work anyways. Remember: Your co-workers are edible.

Y.T. said...

I think cannibalism has an unjustifiably bad name. And I mean that. People conflate simply eating the deceased with murdering people in order to eat them. That's like.. hell, I can't even come up with a good comparison. Maybe reckless driving at high speeds through morning traffic compared to reckless driving on an empty racetrack. (Germany has one of those. On average, one German paying for the privilege kills himself there per week. Place should get a special mention on the Darwin Awards site)

Sure, it's pretty despicable to treat others as 'just' food, on the other hand, not eating those who died of natural causes(old age, stupidity, trying to rob the wrong person etc..) is stupid.

Red meat is red meat. Does it matter where it comes from? A bit.. sure, there are mammals that are not tasty, but that's not our problem.

Biologically speaking, there's not that much difference between the average hog and a couch potato.

Sure, the couch potato had more brains while he were alive, but in the end, probably tastes the same.

Western civilization is really irrational about this. Some people even frown on donating one's organs

(and I really don't get that. to me, giving parts of you, parts you no longer need, being dead, that seems like common courtesy. Like helping someone just because they've had a bit of bad luck)

You don't need your skeletal muscles once you're dead, so why exactly is it wrong to utilize those too?

Why burn the meat, wasting precious hydrocarbons or let the perfectly good meat rot?

Not that I haven't tried, you should've seen the face of the lawyer who was putting my will together when I brought that up. I've never seen a jaw hanging so slackly.

Imho, the best outcome would be for me to be able to eat myself*. But I doubt our society will have the technology needed for that in seventy years or so..

*all that needs is being able to clone new, young bodies and transplant the aging brains into those. Or coming up with a complete, reliable, artificial life support capable of supporting our brain. Preferably one that works at least as well as our current bodies. Tall orders both of those, but longer life is one of the oldest dreams of mankind, so..

Joanna said...

not eating those who died of natural causes(old age, stupidity, trying to rob the wrong person etc..) is stupid.

One word: Kuru. The prions would like to have a word with you ...

On the moral/social level, however, the taboos seem to stem from the necessary setting-aside of humans as different from other animals. That, no doubt, stems from the inborn, unspoken knowledge that if you don't set humans aside as different, a good chunk of the population will begin acting like the animals they now think they are, and that's not good for anybody.

Y.T. said...

Not everyone is susceptible to prions, not everyone has them, and brains don't taste that good anyway.

Skeletal muscles don't contain prions, afaik.

That about the setting aside..hmm.
I don't think it'd be a real problem.

Most urban populations are too squeamish to slaughter a fish. (around here, Carp is eaten instead of turkey on Christmas eve, and there are many anecdotes about people having trouble killing the fish, which is often bought alive)

Ought to be tried small scale though.

Anyway, civil society in the west is very different to what was before. Rates of violent death are at historical minimums.

People who think of themselves as animals?

You mean sheepdogs, wolves? Or furries?

Joanna said...

You mean sheepdogs, wolves? Or furries?

I mean the vandal who breaks a window because he likes the noise, and because he can't think of a reason not to.

Also, and this is not meant as a joke or an insult, I wouldn't want to be trapped in an elevator with you.

cj said...

Gah. This many posts and not ONE mention of Soylent Green?

Tam said...

Y.T./remontoire/Au├čenseiter,

"You mean sheepdogs, wolves? Or furries?"

I have to admit, that's unusually glib and facile even for you.

Tell me, what all have you stalked and killed and then eaten? I'm curious. (Store-bought fishies don't count.)

Y.T. said...

Well, hunting around here is generally prohibited. Unless you go through a year worth of college classes and volunteer some wildlife work , it's far cheaper to buy your pork from the butcher. I'll probably get around to getting that hunting licence at some point in the future.

I don't think I'd have any problems stalking or killing animals. ( I have gotten pretty close to several species of wild, large and tasty mammals, and it wasn't that hard. I have photos of them.

Unlike most people, I like the smell of blood, looking at roadkill or autopsy photos, so even dressing an animal and given a knife and some rubber gloves..

Facile and glib. Sure. I wasn't trying for anything else.

I find it facile to suggest that humans are that distinct from other animals. The way groups of humans work isn't unique, one could probably find a lot of similiar stuff among lower animals. What separates us from animals is reasoning, not emotions or group dynamics. I think you've noted that while we excell at technology, no one has the slightest idea of how to say, lessen cheating and corruption in our societies.

Sure, you libertarians always go on how private business is efficient, but I doubt you(Tamara K)'ve ever worked there(ever been a senior programmer or engineer at a large company).

I've spent months listening to assorted faults and mistakes of corporate management, from bullshit doctrinarism to outright graft and corruption.. (and I really doubt it's better in the US. Judging from the way say, IBM works.., or how much corruption you have in public sector)

It's shite everywhere. It's a miracle something gets done.

Tam said...

Y.T.,

tl;dr version: You haven't. And therefore you're pontificating out your ass.

BobG said...

I've worked at large corporations, and I've worked with the government. As goofy and inefficient as private business can be, the government has them beat hands down.

Y.T. said...

@Tam

Hey, I'll send you pics when I get around to it.

As to pontificating. You're the one running a blog, and you regularily pontificate on stuff you've never done or don't have much practical experience with(politics..).

Tam said...

Beg to differ: I've been involved with politics for quite some time.

Thanks for playing, however!

Y.T. said...

Ranting on doesn't count as being involved... where I come from.

Have you ever been elected to a public office?

GuardDuck said...

Being a participating citizen in a republic makes one qualified to pontificate on politics.

Kristopher said...

I've run for public office, YT, and successfully helped lobby legislators to get mandatory CCW issue passed in Oregon.

( myself, my wife, and two other persons were the entire lobby team, BTW )

My opinion: Running a blog with as many readers as she has while making political comments definitely counts as political action.

More so then some EU-weenie trolling. BTW, if you really wanted to hunt, you can. Just leave your current girly man country for a week. Guided hunts in Russia are dirt cheap.

Joseph said...

Anybody for finger sandwiches?

Y.T. said...

That's good for you, I mean, CCW.

It's not really a problem of girliness. US is girly-man country. I mean, US once caught it's president lying a about some minor indiscretion and he almost got impeached. If men were really in charge in the US, extramarital affars'd be the non issue they're here. No one really gives a flying fuck about whom they're fucking, as long as it's not a minor or a man.

It's more of a tradition problem. Even though there is now too much game in the forests, the tradition says hunting is an elite affair only, so the only people who can hunt legally are the rich snobs, and people who are really into it. The easy hunting you have in the US, that's because your country had never been parcelled among aristocrats. Even though they've all lost their lands, the spirit of monarchy still lingers a bit.

global village idiot said...

You might say that feeding trolls is a form of intellectual cannibalism.

gvi