Monday, December 16, 2013

If you liked $THIS, you'll love $THAT!

So, via some roundabout linkage through Borepatch, I wound up at a blog called The Worst Things For Sale, which takes a look at some of the truly stupid, weird, or awful things being hawked on the internet today.

Bobbi spun her chair around and we scrolled through a full six pages of the awful, like driving slowly past a car wreck, and I had actually clicked on a couple of the Amazon links to see the awfulness in all its [click to enlarge] glory. It wasn't until I found myself looking at the Drink And Food Energizer Orgone that I realized what I'd done to my Amazon browsing history...
Me: "Oh, gawd! I've clicked on a whale dildo, a spandex santa gimp suit, and some kind of crystal magic thing to put positive waves in my food! Based on my recent browsing history, Amazon is going to suggest items appropriate for a retarded pervert!"
If you'll pardon me, I have a bunch of "do not use this item for recommendations" boxes to go click.
.

23 comments:

Erich505 said...

Awesome.

Anonymous said...

I think I speak for many of us by saying "EEEEWWWWW"

Joseph said...

You know, it says something about you that you actually clicked the link to the animal dongs...

Just sayin'

Can't stop giggling here, thanks for the laugh.

Jennifer said...

I'm just going to leave this here
http://www.crapomatic.com/

og said...

This is, indeed, quite the jump from Best made.

OTOH, this blog has featured buffing wheels made from whale penis leather in the past.

I actually LIKE the things my (admittedly eclectic) browsing history causes Amazon to suggest.

John Anderson said...

I wish there were a click modifier for "Open link in incognito window", but right-clicking to accomplish the same really doesn't take up all that much more time...

AM said...

My first deployment I would buy my wife a dress every month just to let her know I was thinking about her.

Amazon started suggesting the book, "So my Husband is a cross dresser..."

True story.

Sherm said...

The San Diego Natural History Museum has a sperm whale penis on display. It's the one thing you're guaranteed to hear about when being told about a visit to the museum.

Brandon said...

Private Browsing ain't just for porn. Mostly, but not entirely.

BGMiller said...

The real amusement will be when it turns out that a lack of caffeine led you to add the items to your wishlist instead of blocking them from the recommendation list.


Given some of the things that have been done in the name of soliciting funds for KTKC I can see Santa Gimp and Shamu's toy being rolled out. Whether as "prizes" or threats I won't think about.

BGM

Windy Wilson said...

So is the Alaska Malemute Coffee like Indonesian Civet Cat coffee?
No thanks.

Matthew said...

Hell, I just got in two replica walrus baculua. One as a present for my boss, one for home defense.

Borepatch said...

It's a maze of twisty tubes, all alike. Except some lead to Rule 34 shopping.

Anonymous said...

ckhl chkl lollol LOLOLOLO ROFLOL PMPROFLOL



2nd verse same as the first

Kevin R.C. O'Brien said...

If you think your Amazon browsing history has a false impression of you, imagine what your personal shadow monitor among the NSA analysts thinks.

RWC said...

Annnnnd...

Productivity is now firmly at zero.

I hope my 'Dream Helmet' gets here in time for Christmas.

hdls said...

You could make Amazon forget all about your questionable browsing history. Hit your homepage (https://www.amazon.com/gp/yourstore/), scroll to the bottom and find the "Recently Viewed Items" link and Amazon will forget all about the items you viewed.

Jay Dee said...

My favorite was the Baby Hjölster. Sent the link to my nephew who was anticipating the arrival of #1 son.

Evyl Robot Michael said...

I loves me some WTFS. That's a daily stop around here.

Brad K. said...

I was disappointed to find that Amazon.com stopped selling Mom Spit (a rinseless cleanser for face and hands). They still had it two-three years ago. No all they have is a Mother's day card about mom spit.

I thought it seemed pricey at the time.

Will from Bama said...

I do it a really simple way: I never browse Amazon on a PC that logs into that site - I use a tablet that is never used to order anything from them. At least cookies on that tablet can't be traced to my Amazon account, unless they somehow start matching IP addresses.

Mike_C said...

@AM: Ahahahaha! Brilliant!

Tam said...

Pardon, it was mean to say "retarded pervert". I should have said "cognitively-challenged differently-jollied person".