*sigh*
It really is too bad that it's from a satire site, because otherwise it would instantly become my new favorite "Jehovah's Witness on the front porch" story.
My current favorite is a tale an old friend of mine, Byron Quick, told me about a roommate he had back in the day. This roommate was a scrawny, Alice Cooper looking dude who was an artist and had a pet python.
They didn't have air conditioning in the old Victorian home they were renting in Augusta, Georgia and so, one fine summer day, this hippie is there, working on his latest painting in the parlor, wearing nothing but this ball python draped over his shoulders. The doorbell rings.
The nekkid artist answers the door, six feet tall and skeletal, with a wild mane of black hair and a snake hanging around his neck, to find two elderly African-American women wearing their Sunday best..."white gloves and all!" said Byron...standing on the porch wanting to tell him about Jesus.
In Byron's words "Those two old ladies, without turning around or touching the ground, went from the front porch to the sidewalk without touching any steps in between, before turning around and skedaddling off down the street. To this day I have no idea how they did that backwards and in high heels."
.
