Saturday, December 02, 2006

I guess it beats harsh language...

The Subtle Safety ring.
"Orange whistles are garish and weapons can easily be turned against you. Attackers rarely strike indiscriminately; they look for an easy target. A woman who projects confidence and direction is less likely to be targeted. The Subtle Safety Ring provides an at hand reminder for the wearer to consider her personal safely and make choices that will avoid dangerous situations."
The weight of the 1911 on my belt is a handy reminder to keep me out of dangerous situations, because nobody wants to be put in a position where she has to shoot somebody. Even under the most righteous of circumstances, it would be a colossal pain in the ass.

My real beef with a lot of these personal protection gimmicks is that they require the user to get within touching distance of an attacker. Most also require some level of physical aptitude to use properly. If you're 5'2" and have never been involved in anything more violent than a dodge-ball game, a trinket like this ring is worse than useless, especially if it instills a false sense of confidence. Get a can of name-brand OC, like Freeze or Punch. Get an extremely bright (60+ lumens) flashlight. Get some training. Get aware. Don't get taken.

9 comments:

Kaylee said...

ya know what....

I think we may have just seen the first safety device that doesn't beat harsh language.

HollyB said...

You missed a chance to recommend The Cornered Cat, or Paxton Quigley, or another author?
Can't believe that!

Dr. StrangeGun said...

Huh. 1/4 of a brass knuckle.

I wonder if it's occured to anyone that if you whould pop someone in the noggin with this thing, you stand a more than good chance of breaking your finger? There's a reason real brass knuckles reinforce against the palm...

D.W. Drang said...

My favorite silly self-defense tool was the 911 jack, which was essentially a bronze barbeque grill cleaning brush in a carrier you wore around the neck. When atacked you were supposed to use this to "rake" your assailant's face, causing him such pain he would run away crying like a little girl, incidently leaving behind a DNA sample. Standard comments about it in venues such as The High Road (or maybe The Firing Line, I don't remember) ran along the lines of whether the coroner could get a useful DNA sample of the assailant after removing the 911 Jack from a dead person's bodily orifices.
Oddly enough, I can't find any references to it on the web anymore...

MarkHB said...

That's amazing. I have never seen such a dangerous and pointless thing in my entire life.

Gahhhhhh.

Homer said...

The linked page for the Subtle Safety Ring contains the phrase "The Subtle Safety™ line of jewelry is a reminder to make safe choices."

So is a pair of 185 grain hollowpoints. Not subtle enough, perhaps.

Several millennia of advancement in a productive western civilization and we're still handing out talismans to ward off the evil spirits?

That faint rustling sound you hear in the background is Samuel Colt and John Moses Browning at about 40 RPM.

Alex said...

I was recently inspired by the bARbie15 and "customized" a small can of mace for a female friend who doesn't like guns or garish orange. Rose pink suited her much better. She now always has it with her. If an assailant mistakes it for lipstick or something else inocuous, so much the better.

phlegmfatale said...

The first thing I thought of when I saw that ring was that it was meant to gouge a little bit of DNA from your murderer so they might have a chance of nabbing him when you were past the living stage of your existence. Duh.

Rustmeister said...

The disclaimer says it all:

"Our Subtle Safety™ jewelry is not intended to be used as a weapon or as an aggressive device; rather it is meant to provide its wearer with confidence and a subtle tool for self-defense."

So, it's just the equivalent of a string tied around your finger.