Monday, September 15, 2008

That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.

I was in to buy Merrill Lynch for four dollars and ninety-seven cents, which was what I had in the change jar, but I woke up this morning to find out that those jerks at Bank of America had outbid me by $49,999,999,995.03.

Oh, well. I didn't know where I was going to keep the bull anyway. My roommate said the garage was right out, even after I promised to get him one of those diaper things the carriage horses use downtown.

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

If you hurry, you may still be able to get in a bid on Lehman Brothers for that much, and they would probably accept. Plus, no bull droppings anywhere, win-win!

Anonymous said...

I wonder who they borrowed money from to buy out Merrill Lynch...

Is it just me or does anybody else smell BOA collapsing from from not being able to pay the "mortgage," so to speak?

BOA is anti-American and is pure evil. Doom on BOA!!

Brad K. said...

According to Sharon Astyk (Casaubon's Book) and the other Peak Oil collapse-of-civilization over the end of cheap energy people - wait until tomorrow.

Anonymous said...

Don’t just risk your company, risk the entire world of Finance. Modest incompetence is insufficient — if you merely destroy your own company, you won’t get rescued. You have to threaten to bring down the entire global financial system. The fear and disruption caused by a Bear collapse is why it was saved. (AIG has the right idea on this)

Unknown said...

Dear Tam:
You can still get in on my plan to purchase a major daily newspaper (the *Austin American-Statesman*). I believe we're up to $15 now (I'm only asking $1 per person from my friends) and, to the best of my knowledge, the majority of the *Statesman* journalists are housebroken.

Ken said...

What the bull would leave in said diaper would be worth more than Merrill Lynch. I don't get BoA's play here, apart from trying to get to be too big to fail? (I am no expert in these matters, though.)

Anonymous said...

STAINLES said:
the majority of the *Statesman* journalists are housebroken.

...or at least "paper-trained" ;p


WV is mosbqkr - middle-Eastern knockoff copy of Mossburg?

Anonymous said...

morgan stanley....this week...golden slacks ....next week....aluminum foil hat on my head ....maybe commodities can save me...all hail alcoa.