Thursday, December 11, 2008

Stopped cold in Seattle.

Our ever-vigilant guardians have prevented us from being invaded by a sedated rhesus monkey.

She should have just waded across the Rio Grande with it.


EDIT: Jeez, I just can't let this one go...

New DHS recruiting slogan: "Are you able to outwit a sedated rhesus monkey? Have we got an exciting career field for you!"

If someone could translate "Smarter Than A Sedated Rhesus Monkey" into Latin, we'd have a new motto for the CBP's shoulder patch. (Photoshop project for those with a double set of 1337 skillz.)

Future Janet Napolitano soundbite after a terrorist attack: "How were we supposed to intercept them? It's not like they were sedated rhesus monkeys or something!"

12 comments:

El Capitan said...

Mmmm... Monkey!

You can boil 'em, stew them, fricasee or even BBQ them for a tasty meal!

'Cause there's no wrong way to eat a Rhesus...

Tam said...

Do sedated rhesus monkeys taste better than crazed spider monkeys? The world wonders...

Kristopher said...

The crack-addled rhesus monkeys are already in the US.

They were paid by Century to assemble CETMEs.

Not sure what Century is using them for now, but we will find out eventually.

Matt G said...

"Cause there's no wrong way to eat a Rhesus..."

El Capitan wins!

Jay G said...

I dunno. I liked the whole smuggling/pirate connection m'self...

Bob S. said...

Had to take liberty with the word
Original phrase
More Intelligent than A drugged Rhesus Monkey

Latin
Magis Intelligent quam A venenum Rhesus Monachus

guncozy said...

dang i had
arsi aliues sedo ab simia

Brigid said...

Smarter quam a sedated rhesus monachus

check your email when you get home this afternoon for a poster. :)

Conservative Scalawag said...

So our beloved BPC folks can find one stupid monkey, but Paco,Ivan, or Kim Fung working housekeeping,cleaning pools, or picking cabbage. Yeah, I feel safer,not.

Anonymous said...

El Capitan, you have GOT to warn a brother before postin' like that! Beer is bad for keyboards!

Adrian K said...

I reiterate:

If any of you have ever driven in Seattle, you'd understand why such stupidity occurs. This is about as good as it gets in this town.

Most of these ijits can't even drive worth a damn in the RAIN.

Ed Foster said...

As for wading across the Rio Grande, I'll e-mail you a horror story some time about what happened to a friend doing just that.
If you're interested. It's not really fit fodder for the blog. And they're wasting time and money on monkeys.
On the subject of when bureaucrats morph into parasites, when Ronnie Reagan was Governor of California he sponsored a study of state efficiency vs. size.
Over 200,000 people, any government becomes more inefficient, at an almost geometric rate of increase.
Under 50,000 it begins to lose economy of scale.
Socrates once said any city with a population over 10,000 was ungovernable. Seeing as he was talking about adult, freeborn men, add five dependents per citizen (two kids and three freeborn female relatives in the extended family), plus three helots per well born Greek, and Eureka! Things don't change much.
All the more reason for some form of devolution in the next election.